Jan 18, 2010 1:56pm

To everyone that references the blog on this topic, I am well aware of it (I mentioned it when posting), but I was curious as to what people's comment on it was & what their justifications were. The OKTrends does note the statistics, but they haven't pinpointed any reasons for why black women or asian men are responded to the least amount, I was curious as to why people think they have their preferences & how much those preferences would affect whether or not they'd respond to a message or pursue something with a person outside of their normal preference. 


Jan 18, 2010 2:07pm

I dont have a preference in women and I actually like to date out of my race, but as the OP stated I get rejected most of the time because I am Asian.  It does kinda suck, cause this is not only a phenomenon online, but is something I have to deal with in real life.  Since joining this site, Ive met girls that say you're pretty awesome guy....BUT you're Asian.  Sorry, but that is racism.  Whenever you evaluate someone solely on their race, that makes it racism.  Just a little disheartening that in dating its so prevalent. 


Jan 18, 2010 2:07pm

white girls are the best


Jan 18, 2010 2:18pm

Race matters very little to me.  If I think you are good looking, then that's it.  I have to admit I do have a soft spot for Asian girls.  There's just something about them.


Jan 18, 2010 3:50pm


Well most Asian girls prefer white guys anyways.  So you're in luck.  Go crazy broheim! 

I'll definitely say since experiementing, I am dissuaded to message white girls.  Most white girls if not almost all white girls never return my messages.  Which makes it even harder cause most of the girls frequenting this site are white.


Jan 18, 2010 4:03pm

I hear you on that - girls of my own race never message me back either.  I have always felt a lot of them tend to be a little bit spoiled or have some manner of superiority complex.
Not a bad stereotype for white people in general, come to think of it.


Jan 18, 2010 5:51pm

I barely even think about race. Sometimes I'm surprised when I hear someone talking about race because it doesn't mean anything to me but to others that's all they can think about.


As I recently said in another thread, racism and homophobia are stupid.


Jan 18, 2010 6:16pm

i somewhat agree with Archer2099 as i myself tried chatting and sending messages to women in OKC...atleast 2-3 Caucasian women out of 4 or 5 women never replied back....and if they did....some of them pretended to be interested using all sorts of sugarcoated sentences...but in the end the result was the same...FAIL...none of them were interested in dating an Asian guy....i guess OKC blog statistics about asian guys having low success rate in dating is true indeed....


Jan 18, 2010 10:43pm

Man, yeah, being Asian is the most terrible thing in the world.

Yeah, not quite.  The problem with Asian guys is that they sit around on internet message boards whining about how white guys get all the Asian women and that white girls never return the favor.

Playing the race card is a bullshit excuse. Even if it had any truth to it stop using it as a crutch and get some better social skills to offset the utter horror of being Asian.


Jan 19, 2010 8:04am

Ok here comes honesty. I am least attracted to Indians (not native american indians). I am also not attracted to mexican men which is really odd being that I am half mexican. But I wouldn't say I would let their race entirely depict whether or not I would date them. I would just have to find them attractive and I guess I just haven't had very many attractive indians or mexicans contact me nor have I seen many on this site in my area that would make me feel as though I had to contact them to let them know I am interested.


Jan 19, 2010 8:17am

Race matters slightly to me but that's because I think we're naturally attracted to people who are similar to ourselves and I consider my race to be Jewish. To put it numerically, if I could rate how attracted I am to a girl from 1 to 100 I'd do so only taking basic traits into account. Jewish girls would get +10 and very intelligent girls would get +20. A lot of Jews are pushed hard by their parents to be smart (or study a lot), so often, one of those girls will get +30 which is a huge increase and explains my inherent preference. No other criteria gets points in either direction.


I've never used race as an exclusionary criteria though. I've dated girls from a variety of races, ethnicities (can this be plural?), and cultural backgrounds. Specifically to the OP's question though, I've never dated a black girl. Not for lack of trying though. I've never gotten a very interested response (or any at all) from most of the black girls I've messaged.


Jan 19, 2010 8:23am

@JakeChance I think that that "natural" attraction to our race is only somewhat true. I don't think we're naturally attracted to our own race, I think that through example of our parents, the typical standards of beauty & the diversity of the people we spend the most time around affect our preference, I don't think it's something that's innate. 



Jan 19, 2010 8:27am

"How much, if at all, does a person's race affect whether or not you're interested? "

Good question, sister! You might as well ask, "are you now, or have you ever been a card-carrying member of any fascist, nazi, or hate-mongering club?" I mean, which stupid idiot would answer your quesion truthfully, in front of a lot of people, for everyone to see, if their answer would make them into an immediate outcast?

Give your head a shake, baby. By the way, I only read the first, opening post.


Jan 19, 2010 8:31am

Beautiful is beautiful. Hot is hot. Sexy is sexy. I could give a fuck what race she is. I'll take an asian girl over whitey any day of the week.


Jan 19, 2010 8:32am

@voroscsepel I don't understand how it's racist to have a preference. If I said I was only attracted to black men, no one would blink twice, why should that not be applied to a white male who has a high preference for white women? Most people in fact have answered honestly, some saying that they prefer to date only within their race, others saying they only date outside of it & others having little to no preference at all. I think that the first page or so everyone was scared of stepping on toes or offending, but now everyone's gotten fairly comfortable. In no way do I think that racial preference indicates whether someone is racist unless they also state that they date within their race because they believe their race is superior. 

Next time, maybe don't make assumptions without reading a single post. 


Jan 19, 2010 8:32am


You're right that it's somewhat true. I've not read a lot on it but it sounds like it's a nature vs nurture thing. The thing I find interesting about this is that without our modern society effecting nurture, we'd naturally only be surround by those like us. Now I'm really interested in reading about more about race and attraction but something tells me it'd be quite a few hours of study and I should be working :-p.

If it helps, I'd totally ask you out if you weren't 2,000+ miles away.


Jan 19, 2010 8:50am

Elle, I hear what you say. Please go back over the posts, and count the men who said "I would never date a black girl". Then devide that number by the total number of people who posted on this thread. Then compare that ratio to the ratio given in the statistics by this site, how many black people there are and how many more times do white people get letters.

I am not going to argue with you. You may be right, I may be right. Do the math, that will decide.

It's just asking "which guys here would not date a black girl" is a very pointed racial question; if anyone answers it in the affirmative, he's dead meat.

If you can't see that, I'm sorry, I can't explain it in simpler terms.


Jan 19, 2010 9:16am


Far as physical appearance, race has nothing to do if I wish to date a woman or not. More to do with shape, style, and confidence in her appearance. Personally, if you were in Saint Louis, I believe we could at least be real good friends.

I do have friends that would not touch a black woman. I'm greedy, and find this to be beneficial to me. Less competition. It's a personnel preference of theirs I believe, I know it isn't racism. I find the preference mind-boggling though..

Regardless, I checked out your profile. Perhaps if you lived in Saint Louis, I'd at least message you and make an effort to see if we can be friends or more. *Shrugs*


Jan 19, 2010 10:27am

@voroscsepel but i never said "HEY WOULD YALL DATE ME?", I asked about general preferences & whether those preferences weigh heavily enough for someone to write a person off because of their race. Perhaps I havent gotten entire honest answers, but I think it's brought forth an interesting discussion. 


Jan 19, 2010 3:30pm

I haven't dated many black women even though I am half. I attribute it to my experiences growing up, which have no business on this forum but if someone were so inclined, message me.

Anyways, everyone gets a fair shot in my eyes. But, honestly, on a side note, women should come correct to a man, just as any man should come correct to a woman; with decent sentence structure and grammar. I grew up in the technological boom, I understand abbreviations, texting vs. phone calls, etc. But seriously, if I have to sit down and give mental effort to decipher your message or conversation, then it probably isn't going anywhere. And, yes, in my own experiences this does relate to the topic at hand.

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