May 17, 2008 10:43pm

I'm 95% sure they can, I just want to make sure.  Like I sent out some messages a while back and the person never replied, but they keep showing up in my matches.  If I removed them from the search (effectively taking them out of my matches), could they still reply if it was just a matter of them taking a long time to get to the message?


May 18, 2008 10:16am

The topic should read "If I remove someone from searches" just to clarify.


May 19, 2008 7:01pm

Nobody knows?


May 19, 2008 7:03pm

I have received a message from someone that I had "blocked" or "removed from searches" - the old 'dead to me'.  I believe where they cannot message you would be if they *have* messaged you and you click through on the bottom of the message to block them.  I have only done this once, but I haven't received anymore messages from the person.  Whether that is because they don't message me (given that I didn't respond) or that they can't, obviously I don't know.

In any case, if you click "remove from searches" that person WILL be able to message you - or would as of a week or two ago the last time it happened to me.


May 20, 2008 6:37am

When you say you can block someone from messaging you, do you mean instant messaging or when sending you mail? I would like to be able to block certain people from sending me mail....especially those who can't understand my profile and email me anyway. How can I do that?


May 20, 2008 6:44am

At the bottom of their mail to you is a link to block them.


May 20, 2008 11:14am

Dead to me will remove them from match searches, your recent stalkers list, and seeing their journals when reading random stranger journals.  It will not prevent them from messaging you.  I also wish it did this simple task.  If they message you, you must click the block link at the bottom of the message.  I'm not sure if that will prevent them from instant messaging you.  You may have to block them there separately.


Aug 16, 2008 12:25pm

Does the other person know if I've removed him from searches?


Sep 24, 2008 6:30pm

You can hit the square containing a circle with a slash through it to block them from IMing you. I'm wondering: if you block someone, does that person know you've blocked him?

Sep 24, 2008 10:24pm

Other users do not have any way of knowing if you've blocked them or "removed from searches" (used to be called "dead to me"), with the exception that someone who is blocked could assume such from the fact that A) IM's to you never work and/or B) when they try to post a comment on one of your otherwise publicly-commentable journal posts, it won't show up.

Jan 23, 2009 10:25pm

I have a four people blocked (for IM and messages) and put on my "dead to me lists". They STILL can message me hours and days later. They keep harassing me and I'm really sick of it. I guess there is no way to really block anyone on this site.

Feb 1, 2009 8:34pm

THIS IS BULLSHIT!!! if you block someone, they shouldn't be able to message you. i keep getting harassed by this guy named jkeeper. i'm tired of hearing how fat and ugly i am. WHAT THE FUCK OKCUPID?

Feb 1, 2009 8:58pm

I think this got broken in the new mail system. They really don't seem to know what they are doing, nor do they bother to test things before getting live. I'm sure they'll fix it eventually, but until then you're probably out of luck.

FWIW though, you're certainly not ugly nor fat.

Feb 2, 2009 10:54am

They definitely need to fix it. I'm getting harassed as well Indigo.

Feb 2, 2009 11:22am

I've had this problem as well. Why can't guys just accept rejection?

Feb 2, 2009 11:37am

You should read my blog entry I just posted from a guy insulting me because I told him "no thank you and good luck". All the guys I've said no to just call me fat/bitch/no wonder I haven't found a nice guy/some other crap that's insulting as anything.

Feb 2, 2009 11:52am

No you guys shouldn't read the post cause you have better stuff to do than worry about some girl's self induced problems

Feb 2, 2009 12:01pm

Or, for that matter, you SHOULD read the post to get an idea of some guy's insecurities about his self worth that he felt the need to impose on her for saying no. I'd hardly call it a 'problem' when she's not interested in someone, and she even had the decency to TELL them she wasn't interested so they could focus their transient affections on someone else. It's people like that that help spread the notion that chivalry is dead.

Feb 2, 2009 12:08pm

No, trust me, she completely exaggerated the truth

Feb 2, 2009 12:17pm

I just copied exactly what the conversation was. He's not the first guy to say things like that because a girl said no. He told me he already wrote me off but in fact, he had already written me off from what I read in his profile.

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