Feb 2, 2013 11:38am

I came across the profile of a user (Deslovesyou) who indicates in his activities update that he's contemplating suicide. I messaged him to ask if it was a joke and to tell him that if so, it wasn't funny, but he indicated that he might be serious. I sent him the number of a hotline and told him to hang on and that it gets better, but I want to know if there's something else that OKC or anyone can do. This is very serious and I don't want anyone to get hurt. What's the protocol for this type of thing?


P.S. I know that some of you will say that this is an overreaction/none of my business, but you gotta take this stuff seriously just in case. 


Feb 2, 2013 11:49am

Take The Suicide Ploy impersonally, to remain One-Up on the patient.


Feb 2, 2013 12:19pm

The pretty girls on OKCupid should message him and say they will sex him, and prove that life is worth living.

There are a few of us who live in New York, you girls could rescue this guy.


Feb 2, 2013 1:46pm

Don't invite him to the forums, the boredom alone can kill


Feb 2, 2013 1:50pm

At the very bottom of your page you'll see About, contact, help. Send a detailed message to contact, and copy/paste the IM. That's the best you can do, unless you want to try to contact the police in his stated area, but he may have a different area posted than where he actually lives.

It really won't do you any good to flag the message or IM, because the flag moderators can't do anything to help you. Sorry.


Feb 2, 2013 2:18pm

The site admins themselves are of limited help.  They can exhort him to seek professional help, but so can any other user.

Which is really all you can do.  There are tricks to help make sure nothing happens today or tomorrow, but longer term than that means they need to face their problems head on.  Something that amateurs are as likely to screw up as they are to make better.


Feb 2, 2013 3:05pm

I think another OKCupid user very recently tried to kill herself, but I might be under a legal duty to keep the facts confidential. idk. I won't risk it. 


Feb 3, 2013 3:38am


The staff here in the past has definitely taken action on some of those sorts of things. I suggest you send the message via the "Contact page" as sandy suggested, if you don't get any response feel free to contact law-enforcement and they probably have a more direct channel to contact OkC if they feel it is necessary.



Feb 3, 2013 2:46pm

I'm thinking of killing myself, in case you're reading this Pilank


Feb 3, 2013 3:52pm

I told a kid on WoW that he should go kill himself, I'm pretty sure he did :/

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