1. Propose a Grand Unified Theory of physics.
2. Write a computer program that generates human-like thought.**
3. Develop the next Facebook/Google.***
4. Travel the world as part of an awesome rock band.
5. Work as an unpaid intern for the Daily Show.
6. Invent a revolutionary new way to produce or store energy.
Unachievable, you say. Laughable. Preposterous. I completely agree: These are ridiculous goals.
If you would like to help me achieve any of these unachievable goals (perhaps you are a physicist, psychologist, computer scientist, musician, humorist, or electrical engineer), you get 15,000 bonus points.
I also enjoy doing other things in my free time, including going to concerts, hiking/backpacking, drinking Guinness, playing guitar and drums, playing video games, skiing, playing soccer, and (apparently) writing short descriptive paragraphs about myself.
* Ideally, I'd like to not die.
** Read this: http://waitbutwhy.com/2015/01/artificial-intelligence-revolution-1.html
*** Kind-of working on this one now, but it's an inside job.
Movies: The Big Lebowski, Fight Club, the old Star Warses, Clerks, Office Space (fuckin' A, man), V for Vendetta, WALL*E, Inception... I also enjoy weird/artsy movies like The Royal Tennenbaums (to all you fancy-pants elitists who think that example's not weird or artsy enough............ I applaud your refined tastes).
TV: The Daily Show, The Colbert Report, 30 Rock, The West Wing, Futurama, South Park, Sherlock, Star Trek: The Next Generation ...
Music: Top scientists agree that The 5 Best Musical Artists are The Beatles, Bob Dylan, Beethoven, Cake, and Radiohead. Other wonderful bands include The Strokes, Weezer, The National ...
Food: is delicious. Except for chicken feet. The shape and texture and bone structure of a cooked chicken foot are just all wrong. It's like eating a small child's hand.
I cannot emphasize this strongly enough: Never eat chicken feet.
2. Good (funny/deep/contemplative/drunk/dirty/smart/silly/stupid) conversation.
4. ??????? (It's a secret. SHHHH.)
5. A sense of humor.
6. Maslow's physiological needs (breathing, drinking, eating, excretion, sex). (Is this cheating, putting all of these on one number? Probably.)
I also spend a lot of time thinking about stupid Apple gadgets, silly webcomics, and petty politics.
Sometimes fat, sometimes thin.
(I lied just now, about my weight;
It really doesn't fluctuate.)
Embarrassing Fact #326: I should have put Singin' in the Rain in my list of favorite movies.
Or: You have fingernails that shine like Justice, and a voice that is dark like tinted glass. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X5KmB8Laemg
Or: You play a musical instrument, and you want to jam after work with me (in SF or MV). Make-outs optional in this case; platonic musical friend time is cool too.
Or: You think Calvin & Hobbes is just about the best thing ever.
Thank you for reading my profile. Have a great day.