41Toronto, Canada
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
My self-summary
Back after a long break.
DISCLAIMER: This represents what being on this site often feels like to me:
And PLEASE: No more messages from women living in the U.S., or Iceland, or Europe looking for a "relationship." Toronto only, please.

My opinions are as strong as they are fallible. Keep that in mind while I get long-winded-y. Profile potentially under construction.

First, my apprehension with all these "statistics" about ourselves:
Let me first say that I have nothing to hide. (In fact, I've been scolded before for being TOO forthcoming, but I still don't fully understand that.) Now, I am a big believer in chemistry, that "je ne sais quoi" about love and/or relationships. I've been - and see others be - friends and/or lovers with people that they would have never spent time with if it had been in this online social networking age within which we can state and over-analyse everything about each other. To me 'compatibility' is just as much about a shared ability to live with and compromise on each other's differences. Obviously there are many exceptions. I won't date racists, homophobes, or people without a good and thick-skinned sense of humour, for instance. I know this sounds corny (and I can be corny!), but love has a mind of its own sometimes, and isn't about thinking "oh, she likes this-and-that, so forget it." Again - I have my limits, but I just feel that the more we say here, the more we risk having that pickiness take over. Besides - a lot of the stuff we could say here is more fun when we say it in person.

That being said, I understand that there are a LOT of douchebags and spooks out there, so I get it. So here we go.
I am (like most of us, I suspect) a walking contradiction: I am a bookworm and a sports guy. (But would never expect a partner to like sports.) I have a degree in Philosophy and a Masters in Film, and am a writer - including poetry - but I don't like being around pretentious people. I can be very loud, but also have many moments of quiet introspection in a day. I am very fit and quite health-conscious about my diet, yet I drink a lot and like to smoke pot from time to time. I am very principled, yet often too forgiving with people I don't know very well. (Well, I don't know them, so how can I say for sure?) I am fiercely loyal and supportive to those close to me, but not afraid to put those same people in their place. (A true friend tells one what they should hear, not what they want to hear.) I welcome new technology in many areas, but am also very old-school. (I still prefer film photography to digital, I didn't have a cell phone until last summer, and I don't drive.) I was a jock when I grew up, but am also a staunch feminist, and generally understand why you find us men so silly. I am a writer, but don't often like to talk about it. I'm going to stop now; this is too long and, like I said, the fun should be in telling it to each other together, not filling out a resume.
What I’m doing with my life
Contract faculty work at York University (mostly Teaching Assistant). I also have dreams/plans to be a writer, but thats' like saying I want to start a band in my garage. We'll see. I've been doing it all my life in so many different capacities, so there's that. Although what kind of job I have is important to me, I am NOT my job. I have goals for bettering myself as a person, but they are not necessarily career-related. I see far too many people these days prance around, going on and on about life goals, only to "fulfill" those via chasing their own tail daily in an office somewhere. That is not me.
I’m really good at
Jeez....I don't know - Jack of all trades, able to master any upon request, is what I've told potential employers before. I have a VERY eclectic job, interest and experience background. I can't draw for shit, but I am very artistic otherwise - especially in the creative department.
The first things people usually notice about me
Aaah - this is the part when humility takes a blow, I guess. I mean are any of us going to out bad things here? That I look a lot younger than my age. Beyond that, I really don't know....I TRY not to be so concerned about what people notice....I've heard my eyes. Lots of people also tell me I'm smart when they meet me, but I truly don't understand why they would say it so early on. In fact, I'm not even sure what I want "smart" to mean anymore. Maybe it's just because I like talking about things.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I'm a former film student....I'm a writer....those two are almost impossible to narrow down. Too much stuff to rank that's too different from each other. I LOVE music. Most kinds, other than new country and some others. It's more about the artists....I LOVE hip-hop, but not any of the misogynistic or gangster crap or silly Kanye shit...funk, jazz, rock, classic, folk, acid jazz, salsa, beat poetry, electronica, the list goes on. I just got into Zap Mama after I read Denzel Washington recommend her in an interview. (I know, I know. But she's pretty damn good.) Love concerts, like the theatre, more picky about musicals.
As far as food goes, I'm vegetarian (14 years), but tolerant of meat eaters. Love to eat healthy (with some wine, of course).
Six things I could never do without
1. Bukowski. I'd figure out the rest.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Everything. Twice over.
On a typical Friday night I am
I really depends. I'm not afraid to stay in and write and cook dinner, but will also party.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I'm not at all a private person with the person I date, so....I'll say that I seem to have a bad habit of leaving this site open on my computer by accident, so if I don't answer you it's likely because I'm not actually online, just logged in.
You should message me if
TEMPORARY POST: .....If you are effin REAL about treating people properly, and not hiding behind the internet's anonymity - something we're all guilty of at times.... Remember when there was a time when we could only interact/date with people either face-to-face or voice-to-voice? Sure, online dating has emboldened many of us to be more open/honest about ourselves, but for many it's also taken away our backbones. I'm talking about starting conversations, etc with someone and then just ditching with no explanation. Changed your mind? Holding out for someone else that seems better (man, do we ever treat each other like commodities here)? Read something in the profile/questions that you didn't realize before? It doesn't matter; we should just be open with the other person instead of just cutting off communication. Would you just walk away from someone in the middle of a conversation w/o explanation if it was in person? Hell, no. (If "yes", then you're the sort of person that "Mean People Suck" bumper stickers were made to address.) I'm not typing this to chastise anyone else - I can handle it, I'm a grownup. But I've done it myself too, and so have friends I know, but no longer. If I take the time to start up anything beyond a hello with you, I pledge from here on forward to be communicative about "leaving". And sorry for my past insensitivity. We all need to pay better attention to ourselves! The anonymity of this site shouldn't be a justification to be more cold/heartless than we would be in person. It doesn't take much to explain your feelings if they change - it's the sort of base humanity that we tend to lose sight of when we spend all this dating time online inside our own heads. At the risk of sounding harsh, if reading this makes you feel guilty, maybe it's a good thing you read it. Think about it.
I should that, no, I am not angry about some previous OKC interactions. I just find the whole thing somewhat problematic.
The two of us