I am a high-functioning nerd. My bookshelf has entire shelves devoted to RPGs, comic books, and board games; I own two console systems; one of my computers runs Linux. I can go days without talking about them, bathe daily, don't freak out around women , and have other interests, but I'm proudly a geek and it's not going to change.
I'm shy but friendly, honest but tactful, cynical but optimistic, and quiet but passionate. I take a while to become fully comfortable with people, but am a fiercely loyal friend.
I am not vegan-friendly but I am friendly to vegans.
I have five nipples.
Okay, that last one was a lie.
I am also madly in love with an amazing woman who is pretty much the best.
I am a comedy tornado, pugnacious, and verbose
Forgetting where I put things I had just a moment before.
Rapidly acquiring basic competency in a task and then failing to devote the necessary time to take it any further.
It's perhaps stretching it to say I'm "really good" at it, but I can pick the lock of a set of standard metal handcuffs even behind my back, assuming I can get my hands on something suitable to use as a pick.
I honestly have no idea. Perhaps you could tell me?
1) Fear and Loathing In Las Vegas, The Big Sleep, Jingo, Last Call
2) Ghostbusters, The Princess Bride, Das Boot, Big Trouble in Little China, Amelie
3) Bad Religion, Warren Zevon, Louis Armstrong, Less Than Jake, Rancid
4) Sushi, Steak, Rice, Noodles
That said, I pretty much always need something to read. I'm one of those people who will read every ad on the subway or everything on the cereal box in the absence of a book.
It's become increasingly clear over the years that I can't do without some sort of outside stimulus. While rather introspective, I'm not one of those people who can just sit in a quiet place and soak it all in for hours and hours. I am far less interesting to myself than almost anything else, so if I'm all I've got to work with I get bored quickly.
I also, when visiting this site, ponder questions like, "What should I have in the 'Religion' section of my profile?" I mean, I'm an atheist. I'm serious about that, and have rather strong opinions on the subject, but I also enjoy a good joke, religious or otherwise. I don't see why I can't be "Atheist, and serious(ly laughing about it)," but there you are.
My mind also wanders off and envisions strange things, like longshoremen adjusting the phase of the moon with winches and hooks, and produces things like this (from my journal, reproduced here to bump the character count of my profile and get another elusive percentage point (am I the only one who thinks it's a load of crap that they keep changing the metric on this? I used to have a "100% complete" profile, then they move the goalposts and send me back to 90 something! Terribly rude!)):
City of Broken Fancies
Streetlight explodes into a galaxy of sparkling flashes as it reflects off minute flecks of glass and metal embedded in the paving stones of the sidewalks.
The streets are haunted by the living. Stumbling, wandering, striding purposefully with blank stares and slack jaws and cheeks sallow and flushed and gaunt and clammy. They mutter, they shout, they tell stories to hear their own voices, reassuring themselves that they haven't stopped existing during the moments of silence in between.
Not that there is ever such a thing as silence. Always there is sound: the buildings form canyons through which the wind speaks in secret voices even when the ghosts retreat indoors. And always and forever, an omnipresent vibration, a hum just beyond hearing but which can be felt in the still moments when the mind turns inwards.
At night, across the river in the foreign land where people's names have no meaning, men turned leather and callous and horn from years of labor, blood the color of the rust that flows in their veins, work the huge winches down by the shoreline and adjust the angle of the moon. The massive hooks, invisible with distance, pull her just so, and the new moon ends with a silver crescent flare.
My main role model for manhood as a small boy was Westley from The Princess Bride.
I'm mildly concerned that this version of my profile is not as entertaining as earlier versions, and it embarrasses me slightly to say so.
I have a full-back tattoo that is not quite completed as originally envisioned because the artist turned into a junkie. I still would like more tattoos.
My first response to a message here is panic.
Message me if you want to teach me guitar. I'm getting nowhere on my own, damn it.
Actually, you probably shouldn't. I've a lady and she's a coruscating ray that illuminates all my dark places. Home is wherever we are together, and I know a good thing when I've got it.