CaelestisAbyss
30 Atlanta, United States
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CaelestisAbyss
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My self-summary
Jack of all trades
Master of none
Cry all the time
Cause I'm not having fun

Sad human and terrified of something making me sadder.
Super creative if I'll ever get around to doing it.
I'm manic-depressive but I try to keep it to myself.
Humanist.
Polyamorous.
Love some creepy ASMR videos.
I'm a lefty, but I also make a good righty.
Favorite things: cold, cool colors, rain, coffee, artstuff, femininity/androgyny.
I don't really believe the binary gender model is at all necessary. If you play by those rules, cool, but I like to have fun across the gender spectrum. I mostly have a masculine demeanor and appearance, but I do enjoy ladying up on occasion. Pronouns are He/She/They cuz I don't give a fuuuuuck. I usually use "they" when speaking of anyone else... I believe neutrality is just easier for everybody.

I'm generally genuine. A terrible liar. People seem to trust me, and I never want to betray that trust.

I have a strange infatuation with deep sea divers... the outfit and the concept of deep sea exploration. I am in awe at giant squids: they terrify but also mystify me. I find it poetic to think they will be my demise.

Kids are the shit. Maybe I'll teach them one day.
You may see photos pop up of me with children... they are NOT my own. I nannied my nephew and niece. They happen to be my favorites. Objectively speaking, they're better than unicorns. If you want a conversation starter with me, just ask me about them, I dare you. Dare you.

Love to see passion and sincerity in people. I want to be around those who can spark my ardor. I want to be around minds in search for better awareness. I feel that when someone believes they have come to understand all that there is to know, they settle for ignorance. I wish myself and everyone to always remain open to the fluidity of humanity and our surroundings.

Egalitarian as fuck about LGBT rights, gender equality, animal rights... just equality in general. I hate hierarchies, corporate ladders, and anything that demands one human being or animal is less than another. At the top of meaningful topics, child development and security hit home base for me.

art: ryandugger.com
tumbl me: caelestisabyss.tumblr.com
There needs to be more hugs: http://thenicestplaceontheinter.net
What I’m doing with my life
Just finished jailbreaking from SCAD Atlanta after earning my Illustration BFA... Slowly reemerging into the world and remembering how to live, socialize, play a game, breathe, eat, sleep, human. Biding my time selling art supplies at Sam Flax until I can place a job(s) in my career.
I’m really good at
writing too much.

Dreaming vividly.
I used to log some of my dreams: http://littleryanindreamland.tumblr.com

Winning massage battles. One day I will reign as international massage champion.

Body heat. I create a lot of body heat. Like, I double as a central heating unit for winter survivors. I could keep 3 people besides myself alive in an arctic clustercuddle.

Hugging. There's a rumor going around. They say I give the best hugs. "Who's they," you ask? I don't know but they need to stop spreading rumors - it's tacky.
The first things people usually notice about me
My pheromonal musk? Saucy hips?
No. It's my hair. Shocker.
People apparently want to own it... True story: someone on okc persuaded me into skyping to try and buy my hair. Long story short, they tried to make me cut it live on camera... some bullshit business practice so yeah I declined.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Movies:
Ex Machina, Vanilla Sky, Moulin Rouge, The Fountain, Cloud Atlas, What Dreams May Come, Eternal Sunshine, Stardust, Howl's Moving Castle, Escaflowne, Fifth Element, Serenity, Leon The Professional, V for Vendetta, Raimi's Spiderman 1 & 2, The Avengers, Iron Man, Watchmen, The Dark Knight, Sin City, Hellraiser, Boondock Saints, Smokin' Aces, Cloverfield, Cabin in the Woods, Silent Hill, Butterfly Effect, The Cell, Mirrormask, Night Watch, City of Lost Children, Hugo, Amelie, Pirate Radio, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Scott Pilgrim, Kick-Ass, Tron/Tron Legacy, Legend, Labyrinth, The Last Unicorn, Little Nemo, Neverending Story (say my name, Bastian!)... um... Kung Pow!, Austin Powers, Shaolin Soccer, any Monty Python movie, Office Space, Hitchhiker's Guide, Zombieland, What We Do in the Shadows.

Music:
Muse, Death Cab and Postal Service, The Beatles, Nobuo Uematsu, Sigur Ros, Explosions in the Sky, This Will Destroy You, Apparat, Kodomo, Boards of Canada, Blue Stone, Ulrich Schnauss, Tangerine Dream, Jamie XX, James Blake (mmm), Tycho, Little Dragon, M83, BT, Daft Punk, Royksopp, Imogen Heap/Frou Frou, Kate Havnevik, Bjork, Mum, Mike Milosh, Portishead, Telepopmusik, Caravan Palace, Basement Jaxx, Galantis, MIKA (!!!), Scissor Sisters, La Roux, Outkast... game music reorchestrated because nerrrrd, ambient, celtic. Just please don't make me listen to shitty country, pop, or rap.

Food:
Omnivore. Yes, I love meat. Salmon is my favorite animal to consume. I require spinach in my salad. Fuck tomatoes.
Favorite cookie: no-bake cookies.
Coffee... in all its many forms. I drink coffee black with sweet foods, though.

Shows: Jessica Jones, Daredevil, Firefly, Game of Thrones, Sherlock, Misfits, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, Escaflowne, SAO, Cartoon Hangover stuff like Adventure Time and Bravest Warriors (60% because Catbug: youtu.be/rFWb7DG7zTc)
The six things I could never do without
1. Earth
2. Fire
3. Wind
4. Water
5. Heart
6. and Captain Planet.

alternatively:
Coffee
Cold
Music
Isolation
Inspiration
Jetpack
I spend a lot of time thinking about
I should've left sooner… I should've stayed longer… I probably offended someone... that message had to of made the relationship more awkward... Am I acting too assholish. I'm such a pushover... I'll never be as strong as they think I am... I'll never meet the level of worth they seem to think of me... Will my tribulations ever see rectification... Will my family ever understand what I've undergone to keep the peace for them. How does everything come to be... Why is anything the way it is- cataclysmic butterfly effects, social conditioning, my thoughts manifested, or your's? String theory bullshit... We're probably living in a simulation, anyway... Did humans invent that simulation in the future? Are we just stuck in a loop of existence we engineered?
Each little thing, every microhabitat, vibration or cell, could reflect some macrocosm. Cosmic matter ascended from stars to become sentient life, which evolved and birthed concepts allowing it to marvel at itself- what the universe has become when we used to be nothing but hydrogen. We're riding a crescendo of astral brilliance; maybe the universe made us so it had an audience to admire the show. ...Narcissus-ass universe.
Everything is connected, an ocean of molecules endlessly echoing with waves and vibrations, but to what dimension?... am I convince myself that I have deja vu when it was genuinely a past glimpse I had of the future?... Does that mean my cells that exist now also exist in the future and can share signals of sensory memory that transcends spacetime? I swear I'm not stoned right now.

Sometimes, I'll catch a glimpse of someone driving by, or an image in the static. And for a moment, I'll revel in what I thought I saw, a concept sparks from a momentary sight and maybe turn into a character backstory, or some type of narrative of bizarre events.
On a typical Friday night I am
Same as any other night, Pinky...
Scrambling to pay off student loan debt.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I use tumblr for more than porn, which is a foreign concept to some friends of mine. Contrary, 90+% of my Reddit visits are to the nsfw subreddits. :|

-*-This next portion is pretty personal, just a heads up.-*-

For the first years of my life up through my adolescence, I was sexually molested on a daily basis by a relative. The person I looked up to during my childhood. I hardly mention this to people I meet in person, now. I don't wish for this to define who I am to myself or others... but it's an aspect of my past that I cannot deny being a fundamental part of who I've become, so I feel it's worth mention in a comprehensive self-description.

THAT ESCALATED QUICKLY, RIGHT?
At least this confirms how honest I can be. I'll basically admit to or discuss anything.
You should message me if
you're cosmic.
You want to go to Six Flags with me.
You can prove to me you're not a flake.
You think we'll dig each other. I'm exploring any connections I have with people, whether it be intellectual, romantic, sensual, humor, inspirational, or comfy fun. 420 fun a plus. Although I prefer to talk to people that view relationships on a broader scope, I still enjoy learning others' perspective which differ from my own.
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