CarterJons
34 Charlotte, United States
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CarterJons
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My self-summary
So in my most recent performance review at work, I was labeled as an "artist type" and as someone "unlikely to conform to the company culture," probably not the best thing when you work for an company that takes great pride in its ultra-conservative values (hey it's a paycheck), but I'll take the compliment none the less...at least I'm putting that whole "engineering" degree to some sort of use, and next time you turn on the lights you can thank me... yea, fuck you Thomas Edison.

I like to think I'm a reasonably rad guy. Have I set any world records? Well none that Guiness would publish if they value their reputation. I'm intelligent, clever, and quick witted. I've been accused of being a nerd, and just because I've taken every math class there is does not make me a nerd and I will not allow you to stereotype me as such. My humor can be dry at times, so just never take anything I say seriously, and we should be good... unless we're in a plane crash. Then I might be serious, probably not, but you never know.

I am a liberal free thinker forced to exist in a conservative world. I come from a world of advanced mathematics in multiple dimensions and the impossible quest for "perfection," yet I prefer and embrace all that is imperfect in the world. I like tattoos, piercings, art, music, free expression and theoretical politics. The outdoors and the mountains are where I belong, and desire to spend my time whenever I can. I like to go on adventures, yet sometimes it's nice to be surrounded by familiarity.

After a conversation with my dearest friend Jane about life, dating, sex and the universe in which we live, a few conclusions were made. I am a real true science & math geek of a nerd. Not this new hipster defined "nerd," where you throw on some glasses, drink coffee, read a book without pictures, and act like you're a deep person. As far as my personality goes, I am probably best described as an extroverted-introvert. If I'm with people I know I'm usually wide open and making you laugh your ass off, but in new surroundings with new people I can be rather reserved. I've been told I have no filter, but I'm self-aware enough to know that not everyone appreciates my "anything goes" sense of humor and liberal use of the word "fuck." That being said, it usually takes a couple of hang outs before I open up to a person... but once I do, I'll either become one of your favorite and most trusted people you've ever met, or you will want nothing to do with me. As far as the whole "kids" thing goes, at this point I'm not overly excited at the prospect of having them, so if you're dead set on having some chilluns' I'm probably not your guy. I am very independent and 100% self-reliant, extremely loyal to those people I am close to in life. I'm not a prolific dater (I'm busy and lets be honest, dating is a pain in the ass), and I don't have to have a person in my life, but I very much would like to... hence why I'm here
What I’m doing with my life
I wake up in the morning and beat the snooze button on my alarm to the point I should probably be brought up on charges, then I throw on my dark rimmed glasses and do the 8-5 work thing. It's a paycheck and it allows me certain luxuries like indoor plumbing... and lets be honest, indoor plumbing is the shit....

When I finally return home, I cook an epic 7 course gourmet dinner, light a single scented candle, romance myself carnally, and go to bed only to do it all over again the next day... like Groundhogs Day... only with less Bill Murray and more masturbation. (Bill Murry, if you're reading this, and I don't know why you wouldn't be, lets hang out.)

When the weekend rolls around I've been heading to the mountains to do some downhill mountain biking, and just general hanging out in that part of the world. I love the Asheville area, would very much like to live in the area and I am totally open to dating someone in the Asheville area.

If that wasn't enough, I also own my own small business, specializing in custom metal fabrication, restoration, and customization of Land Rovers. I'm definitely a guy who knows how to build shit. So if you're looking for a guy that is always clean, dapper, and considers building Ikea furniture an accomplishment, I am not your guy. If you can handle your man getting dirty and spending the better part of his day wearing Carhartt work pants and steel-toe boots, we might be on to something...

I'm also the bass player in a new Charlotte metal band. I've been playing bass for quite a while, played in a few bands... stopped for a while, and then realized just how much I missed playing music live so I'm back in the game.
I’m really good at
Making people laugh with crude and inappropriate comments, inciting riots (the L.A. Riots of 1992, all me), having normal nights turn into epic "life stories" and eating inordinate amounts of sushi, making things out of metal, turning wrenches, welding, contemplating the meaning of life, finding hidden dives with amazing foods... the extra "s" was intentional grammar Nazi's.
The first things people usually notice about me
My dimpled smile and outgoing (read: dirty, crude, vulgar, charming) sense of humor. Also, I look way younger than I am, people are usually shocked when they find out I'm not 25...
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
90's alt-rock and all the more technical death/doom/sludge metal. Primus, Hum, Failure, Smashing Pumpkins, Faith No More, Between the Buried and Me, Cattle Decapitation, Pig Destroyer, the list goes on.

I LOVE me some food. Like for serious. Indian, Vietnamese, basically anything ethnic or awesome. I've been told I know all the good dives and hole in the wall places.....and I know how to cook, I'm currently teaching myself the secrets to Indian cooking....and I'm actually an obnoxiously healthy eater.

As far as TV goes, I'm really bad at watching shows and following series, I've heard all about GoT and Walking Dead, but just have a cursory knowledge of them... That being said, I do like Rick and Morty, Aquateen, Frisky Dingo, Bob's Burgers, South Park, Daily Show, Archer, River Monsters, Venture Bros, and more! Read that "and more!" part in the Monster Truck Announcer voice.
The six things I could never do without
Music, the outdoors, excercise, sunlight, my tools, masturbation, elite foodie-ism, NoDa Bodega's menu.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Any one of the several projects I have going at any given point in time. Music I'm writing. The 10,000 mile expedition I'm planning (hope you like road trips) Also tacos. Tacos rule.

Why I apparently should be living in Durham/Carrboro/Raleigh... according to my OKC possible matches, this seems to be where are the beautiful, liberal, adventurous, intelligent ladies are these days... sorry Charlotte girls, ya'll really need to step up your game and quit being Republicans.
On a typical Friday night I am
Up to no good makin' trouble in the neighborhood, Plaza-Midwood that is....and I just combined two TV show theme songs, so there.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I'll probably be emotionally distraught if your dog does not immediately fall in love with me....no, really.
You should message me if
You know the meaning of life... because I'm still trying to figure out why I'm here... on this site... not the universe....
You want to learn how to weld...
The idea of driving all over the North American continent in an old Land Rover sounds exciting to you...
You've kept track of how many masturbation references I've made in my profile.
You are genuine and interested in meeting, hanging out and getting to know me.
You are honest and not looking to play games. Been there, done that, don't have time for it.
You want a real partner in crime.
I've come to terms with the fact that given the right situation I can be open to certain forms of non-monogamy/polyamory (sorry mom), but I'm after a real partner in crime, monogamous or otherwise, and I'm not looking to be someones side piece.
You are Bill Murray.
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