Don't try eating my dessert though, I will fight you.
I walk around with a smile on my face and a glint in my eye. If you want to know more just ask.
I don't take myself too seriously.
I love all of the crisps, the flavours of crisps. All of the crisps. Different types and makes of the crisps. All of the crisps..........
You'll probably find me laughing out loud somewhere while listening to comedy on my mp3 player while everyone around me then stares at me as if i'm a lunatic.
I love to write comedy articles for badscentsofhumour.com and am planning on getting back to performing too.
I like films too, probably some of the same as you, No to Titanic though, have never wanted to watch it all as after 10 mins i'm shouting at the screen 'no, no, you're all shit, this is shit' and leaves me wanting to punch DiCaprio.
Current comedy faves Community, Parks and Rec and Brooklyn Nine Nine. Stewart Lee, Richard Herring, Robin Ince, Josie Long, Tim Minchin, Peter Serafinawicz, Charlie Brooker, Lee Mack, Stewart Francis, The Horne Section and on and on.
Loving Daredevil, Jessica Jones, Master of None, Only Connect.
I watch wrestling so if you are someone who would say 'you know it's not real right?' then sits down to watch a soap opera and talks about the characters as if they are real, move along we won't get on.
Love music and will happily listen to most things, apart from Westlife and Bieber (may they both be sucked into a wormhole) My absolute favourites are the Barenaked Ladies, Anais Mitchell and Ben Folds Five.
Love gaming, I am currently lost in the commonwealth of Fallout 4. Skyrim, MGS V, Hitman, Batman Arkham series, Peggle, Cards Against Humanity, Scrabble, Boggle and on and on.
I eat food, yes.
Lots of podcasts and Radio 4 too.
Like, what would happen if Richard Dawkins suddenly developed God like powers. Would he deny his own existence? Would he pay for a bus to go around the country with signage declaring 'there probably isn't a Richard Dawkins....' Would we start attributing things to him with no direct correalation. Would we then celebrate his birthday, not on the supposed actual day, but on a day used by another religious doctrine in order to subvert it only then for it to become meaningless in mass commercialisation. Or maybe i'm over thinking this one
Just place them in an envelope, send them, along with anything else you may hold of value and by value i don't mean any sentimental rubbish, real value that i can pawn...err i mean value correctly, to my untraceable PO Box and your reward will almost definitely be sent back to you, sometime.
Look i have an honest face. I once helped an old lady across a road, admittedly she didn't want to go but i made the crumbly cross that road and left her there crying, tears (of joy?) streaming down her craggy face before popping down the local RNIB club to move the furniture around.
So you see kind and honest, so go on send me your preciouseseseses. The address is
'Carrots for Carats'
PO Box 666
London. MU65 RU
Like anyone would seriously put something in this box.
.....I love all of the crisps, the different types of crisps, the different flavours. You know, all of the crisps
You fancy a trip to a museum, gallery/exhibition or theatre. Or want to spend an evening looking up at the stars in wonder and delight.
You want to discuss comics, wrestling, Richard Feynman or comedy.
You think you'd be the perfect 3rd member of my Only Connect team
You know the difference between 'Your', 'You're' & 'Midge Ure'
If you've read my profile, it made you laugh and you realise my tongue is in my cheek
Or don't and come say hi on twitter instead, when you're bored of stalking celebrities, being outraged & playing hashtag games obviously. (@Charisma_Effect)
You SHOULDN'T message me if you backed Brexit, think Trump should be President, don't believe in equality or just are generally an ignorant arse.
What's my favourite flavour of all the crisps? ....................*shrugs* Ready Salted