ChrisGro
33 Los Angeles, United States
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ChrisGro
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My self-summary
If you can think of a better time to describe one's self on a dating website than 2 in the morning, I'd like to hear it. What's that you say? Practically any other time? Pssshhh, where's your sense of adventure? This way even I don't know where this description will go.

With all apologies to my mother and father, I was largely raised by television (though I spend almost no time watching it now). As such my communication is sort of seeped in pop-culture; I'm talking Simpsons references, "that's like the part in Ghostbusters where…", and the like. If that sounds irritating, well we're kind of at an impasse here already.

That's not to say I'm incapable of communicating about more serious, deep things. I actually prefer it to small talk. I'd rather talk about I don't know, feminism or your opinion on the afterlife. "Let's cut the shit and get into it" I'll say with a smile. Though I would also like to know where you're from and hear about a funny thing your cat did one time.

I have been told that I can be hard to read. I blame a dry sense of humor and an occasional tendency toward monotone. Just underneath that I assure you I am a festival of emotions. The other day I got misty-eyed at a Youtube comment so y'know, I can be sensitive.

A significant part of my sense of humor is predicated on the listener knowing that I'm not really an idiot. Just know that if I say something really really stupid, I'm probably kidding. Probably.

I'm always game to do something stupid. A cash-only bar warms my heart (not a big deal if you don't drink, I'm not one of them Bukowski-worshipping puds who mistakes alcoholism for a personality). I clean up pretty well. I can be a bit of a filth-mouth. Sorry in advance. Or not sorry, if you're also a bit of a filth-mouth. Please ask me anything else you want to know. I'll answer literally any question I'm asked.

Good description for the moment? It'll have to do.
What I’m doing with my life
That's none'a your g.d. business.

Kidding! TV nonsense. Currently working in reality (I promise I'm not an unfeeling monster), figuring out how to transition into the scripted world. Mother-effer's gotta eat, y'all.
I’m really good at
Talking with my hands, remembering pretty much every detail of even the most mundane interactions, hugging, looking awkward in an elevator, making friends with your dog, striking the balance between earnest performance and goofiness during karaoke, not being a dick if we get lost, eating hummus.
The first things people usually notice about me
Usually my shiny pate (I am a bald) or the large tattoo on my forearm. Also, I get compliments on my eyes and eyelashes.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books
Lately: Noticing an obvious dearth, I am in the midst of a year of reading only women, so right now it's:
Margaret Atwood - Oryx & Crake
Hilary Mantel - Wolf Hall
Jennifer Egan - A Visit From the Goon Squad
Marilynne Robinson - Housekeeping

All-Time:
Marquez (magic realism is my jam), Vonnegut, Fante, McCarthy, Ellison (both Ralph and Harlan), Didion, and more!
I've got a lot of goddamned books.

Movies
I'm awful at naming movies I like. I worry about coming off as alternately pretentious or dumb. I've been watching a lot of Cassavetes now that the Criterion collection is available on Hulu. Watch the Silkworm documentary "Couldn't You Wait" and The Flaming Lips "Fearless Freaks" once every couple months because they're inspiring.

Music
There is a live version of "These Arms of Mine" by Otis Redding. In the beginning the crowd can be heard. A woman is requesting "Good to Me" over and over. The band kicks in and everyone rightfully loses their shit. Otis hits the line "they are lonely" and just twists "lonely" for all it's worth. It's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard.

The 2nd most beautiful was at a Neurosis show last year. So, my taste is somewhere between those two poles, with a lot of 70's-80's punk rock thrown in. I'm in whenever PJ Harvey puts something out, the last Sharon Van Etten record is great, and I've been listening to a lot of Uncle Acid & the Deadbeats, Weedeater, and Eyehategod lately.

TV
Breaking Bad, Game of Thrones, Louie, and all the same shit everyone else likes. About to start tackling the largest hole in my TV knowledge: The Sopranos.

Food
Burritos and other cultures' burrito equivalents. F'real though, I'm down to eat anything. I am not a vegetarian/vegan though I can readily admit that they're probably right.
The six things I could never do without
Does this question ever reveal anything interesting about anyone?
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Is the tendency toward grammar-Nazism in the educated of my generation born of a genuine concern for language and communication or simply pedantic back-pattery?

Am I coming off as playful and nonchalant or moody?

Also sex, death, the apocalypse, and baseball.
On a typical Friday night I am
down for whatever.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I'm apparently the only person on the planet who doesn't care for Muse.

I'm pretty much an open book. Not a lot I keep private if the question is asked.
You should message me if
that sounds like a fun thing to do.
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