48San Francisco, United States
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
My self-summary
Tip: If we both "Like" each other OKC will supposedly let us write each other.

The scores on OKCupid work for finding compatibility, so they matter to me.

Most of my answers to OKCupid questions are marked private, but if you want to know my answers just ask me (and tell me yours).

Please check out the "You should message me if" section below first to save some time…

Back? Good.

I've got more than a few sides to me. I tend to surprise people whose vision of me has me tucked neatly in a box or is derived solely from first experiences. So here I am literally describing myself in a few paragraphs…in a box. Hm.

In general I like to be active, playful, appreciative and to joke around. I do stop to smell the flowers…and point out their beauty. If you’re big into enjoying simple things, beauty in all things, and calm or amusing moments…and sharing that experience, then we’d have a lot going for us. If not then I’d want to spend an unspecified amount of time with others who are.

Being constantly active can be tiring. I do enjoy relaxation time to rest and recharge.

When the time calls for it I can be serious, contemplative and listen intently. Actually, I'm a pretty good listener. People tend to focus me, particularly people who need to say or share something important.

Sharing knowledge, perspectives and experiences is something I value. Do you appreciate art, literature, essays, and or architecture? Great, let's soak it up and talk about it.

Do you have political or philosophical opinions that you'd like to back up with facts or at least a good argument? Awesome, let's get into it.

Do you love being out and seeing beauty? Let's go.

Do you want a friend to listen and to bounce ideas off of? I'm there.

I have a habit of thinking of ways to make things better and to actually apply them. I like being creative and coming up with unusual solutions and improvements. My new habit is to introduce these hopefully-good-ideas without pushing them where they don't fit or aren't invited.

I'm a bit of an extrovert and an ethical hedonist.

I'm a fun and helpful person who wants to spend time with intelligent, good spirited people. What I'm not interested in is spending time with folks who tend to be selfish, cruel or insensitive. Most people have something to appreciate about them...I'm just looking for honesty and consideration to go along with it.

Three words to describe me:
Curious, observant, and compassionate
What I’m doing with my life
Learning, growing, working and playing.
I’m really good at
Listening, being patient, explaining things in ways people get, bicycling, fixing things, making some people laugh, massage, Scrabble, tennis, flirting
The first things people usually notice about me
My smile, my eyes, my height...some body part/shape or another. Maybe that I've noticed them. Possibly that I'm intelligent and have something to say. Occasionally that I'm steering group conversation and making people laugh.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Reading long form is tough for me. I wish it weren't but that's the way it is. Last read "A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius" (yikes, life hurts!), "Love in the Time of Cholera" (surprisingly might have to know me to know why), "Snow Falling on Cedars" (damn, love hurts!).

Too many to list them all.

My most recent favorite: Mary and Max.
My most recently seen and pondered over: Shame

A sample in no particular order: True Grit, Up, Waking Life, The Pianist, The Incredibles, Frida, Chicago, Ratatouille, Serenity, Finding Nemo, Memento, Wedding Crashers, Amelie, About A Boy, Old School, March of the Penguins, The Red Violin, Fight Club, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, The Big Lebowski, Fargo, American Beauty, Last of the Mohicans, When Harry Met Sally, The Princess Bride, Arsenic and Old Lace.

• My musical preferences are all over the place. Anything with a good beat and or thoughtful evocative lyrics. I could say everything except for rap and country except non-misogynistic, non-violent hip hop has good energy and country with folk roots is often good.

I enjoy these sources of new music:
• KCRW's Today's Top Tune
• MPR Current Song of the Day
• KEXP Song of the Day

SHOWS [Complete With Explanations for Why I Bother]
Mad Men [sexy, philosophical, smart], Breaking Bad [goofy, intense, long story arcs and great cinematography], The Colbert Report [damned funny and a better news source than most, sadly], The Daily Show [see Colbert Report, only less so on the funny front], House M.D. [my favorite all-American, atheist, genius played by an Englishman], Big Bang Theory [guilty pleasure…makes me laugh more than groan], Archer [sick and twisted, absurd, adult humor; great writing, great timing, beautiful art direction and great sound]

Older shows:
Firefly [life on a tiny ship in the inky black sea of space (a home and crew/family you grow to love) and an us-against-big-brother storyline], Scrubs [absurd, well performed shtick], Six Feet Under [dealing with death in America, shock!]

Thai, Italian, Indian, Mexican. I do like spicy foods, but not exclusively.
Six things I could never do without
Friends, love, purpose, passion, fun, and hope. If we're talking objects I could probably do okay without them, but these would be on my list: my Mac, my iPhone (gives me structure), my passport, and my iTunes Library.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Politics, personal and social progress, computing (what can I say, I'm a geek and a progressive). Oh and relationships.
On a typical Friday night I am
...more likely to have a calm evening than on Sat or Thurs night. If there's a house party, I'm there. Otherwise, I'm likely to be reading, writing, watching a documentary or a comedy or having dinner with a friend.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I'm way more flexible than you'd believe a non-ballet dancer to be.
You should message me if
Note that I’ve checked, “friends”, “activity partners”, “short-term dating” and “long-term dating”. I’m interested in any and all of them—they all have value to me.

Short-term dating and activity partnership to me is just about having fun and companionship. Be fun. Be a good companion.

For everything else I’m interested in meeting highly compatible people. Please have a Match score above 85% and an enemy score below 15%.

If that’s not the case, like maybe because you haven't answered enough questions yet, then please start answering more questions and or explain to me why you think we’d be good friends or good long-term dating partners (I may ask for details). Please don't write me without at least telling me a few things you liked about my profile and why you think we'd get along.

With long-term dating I’m interested in dating that is centered and grounded in developing a friendship first and foremost. If it works out for more than that then great!

For me to be into a long term relationship I would want to know you really like me and not just the idea of romance and or significant other relationships. I’d want to know you have my back and would be encouraging and supportive.

Just as important I’d want you to be someone who really wants to be loved, and can let someone love them. I’d want you to allow me to be there for you, to encourage you, and be supportive. You know, we're there for each other.

I'd want us to step by step be able to share our intimate thoughts and feelings…and enjoy it!

I’d want someone who would value feeling that we're each other's dear friends as well as a lovers.

If you can’t be my friend I don’t want to get into a long term anything with you.

…you think we have something in common or you think we would like each other's company. Just be ready to tell me why you think so.

…you know someone who you think might get along really well with me. Just be ready to tell me why and or send me their profile name.

…you care enough about effective communication to at least aim for correct spelling, grammar, punctuation and capitalization, even if you're not good at them. They make written communication much clearer…and more fun!

…you're tobacco and tobacco-smell free.
The two of us