28 Seattle, United States
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My self-summary
I'm like leftover pizza. I'm not the best, but I'm still pretty good.

No, I won't grow a beard for you. They itch. Sorry.

Feminist, Satanist, democratic socialist, transhumanist, part-time futurist, and full-time hedonist. Also, I really like dogs. And pasta.
What I’m doing with my life
"What do you do?" is invariably interpreted to, "How do you sell your labor?" I work in aerospace on an assembly line, that's it for now. Previous dates have noticed that my eyes reflexively glaze over when the topic comes up, so that should give you an idea of how I feel about it. If you and I ever end up meeting, do me a solid and don't ask about it.

Otherwise, I have a wide variety of interests that are split relatively neatly between technology, gaming, civil/labor rights, church-state separation, and their related ongoing political discussions. Church-state separation is my "pet" issue as it were, and I help build a small community of activists for this cause and coordinate our movements around the greater Seattle area. I also do video games and a bunch of online classes. Data science is fascinating from what little I know of it at this point.
I’m really good at
Generally, making people laugh. I've tossed around the idea of doing stand-up, and even had part of a routine ready at one point, so even while that's on the backburner, I try to always keep one one-liner in the chamber, so to speak.

Getting down to business and defeating the Huns. Why do you suppose you've never seen any in this area? Exactly.

Also I'm decent at photography, I guess.
The first things people usually notice about me
1) Love of theatrics. Puns, physical comedy, wild gesturing for emphasis, I do it all!
2) [Redacted]
3) Love of pasta and food in general. It fills the empty spot where a sense of shame should hypothetically be.
4) Terrible music/literature/game references
5) I fidget a lot.

Some people tell me that I intimidate them. I don't really understand how, but I don't do it on purpose, I promise. I'm a teddy bear. Or possibly a slightly hairier version of Marvin the Paranoid Android.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Stuff I read:
I read a lot of political history and social issue books these days. I'm very much pro-labor and anti-(oppressive structure of your choice), so right now I'm working through A People's History of the US and various essays by classic anarchist philosophers (Emma Goldman, Mikhail Bakunin, etc).

But obviously, just sticking to politics and the real world would be incredibly boring, so some of my favorite fiction titles and authors:

Most of the Forgotten Realms series by RA Salvatore
Ready Player One
Fahrenheit 451
A Clockwork Orange
The Harry Potter series
The Alchemist
A Canticle For Leibowitz
World War Z (no really, my last tattoo is a quote from this)
Random stuff by HP Lovecraft

I have a bad habit of buying large numbers of books at Value Village because of their damn "Buy 4, get the 5th free!" deal. So I collect classics, tech manuals, whatever - but I've been trying to refresh and expand my fantasy and scifi tastes more recently. Name me an author! (I love homages to Lovecraft and classic mythology)

Stuff I listen to:
My taste in music defaults to, "What, at this moment, will do the best job of keeping me awake at work until the caffeine kicks in from the shitty office coffee?" I play hopskotch across all genres and I can't vouch for the quality of my taste at all. I'm just as likely to listen to Tchaikovsky as Ke$ha.

I default to classic rock/hair metal because Joan Jett is the sexiest woman alive and probably will be even if she lives to be a hundred. Also electronica/trance.

Other bands/performers important to my well-being:
Jonathan Coulton
Tim Minchin
Garfunkel and Oates
Bo Burnham
Lily Allen
Infected Mushroom
Iron Maiden
Marilyn Manson
Daft Punk
Five Iron Frenzy
Streetlight Manifesto

I also listen to a lot of standup these days, thanks to Pandora. John Mulaney is quickly becoming my next idol after Elizabeth Warren. Chris Rock, Dave Chappelle, Lewis Black, Robin Williams, Louis CK, on and on. Also, I adore the hell out of Iliza Shlesinger and Rebecca Corry.

Stuff I Watch:
Lot of sci-fi/fantasy stuff, mostly, and TED talks.

Rick and Morty
Invader Zim
Bob's Burgers
Warehouse 13
The Walking Dead
Young and Hungry
Lost Girl
It's Always Sunny

I watch The Daily Show, Last Week Tonight, and old episodes of The Colbert Report religiously. I also have a tradition of watching Colbert's White House Correspondents' Dinner speech on a semi-regular basis, because the shit-eating grin on W's face will never get old.

I'm generally addicted to older Disney movies, because the soundtrack for The Hunchback of Notre Dame is absolutely amazing and never gets old. But I like pretty much any kind of movie if it's done well (but I have a soft spot for zombie movies regardless of quality). Most of my movies are sci-fi, action-drama, and Pixar. Lord of the Rings marathon, anyone? Or a marathon of the MCU movies, because Iron Man is my spirit animal.

Stuff I eat:
I eat basically everything that either isn't miso soup or doesn't have olives or mushrooms in it. Preferably pasta. You could bribe me with lasagna or Nutella, and possibly even with Nutella-covered lasagna. I love the royal hell out of BBQ anything, though. Also I really like curry. And most other ethnic foods, come to think of it. Variety is the spice of life. And so are actual spices.

I'm currently on a huge macaroni and cheese kick. Right now I add parmesan, paprika, Italian sausage, and a drizzle of BBQ sauce to the standard box of Kraft. It's amazing and I'll probably never get tired of it. But more recipes are always welcome!
The six things I could never do without
The bottom two tiers of Maslow's Hierarchy are a given. Food and oxygen are incredibly boring to list as needs, especially in multiple spots out of the six things. I love food, but if I'm going to list it, I'm not going to say "lol food yummy," I'm going to say "that saucy-prickly smell of a well-cooked sirloin racing the smell of mashed potatoes to your nostrils." (Spoiler alert, this isn't actually my favorite smell.)

My education.

Does it sound narcissistic to say "concern for my legacy"? How about if I said I want my legacy to include making the world better for as many people as possible, or at least markedly worse for the people responsible for keeping the world as shitty as it is? Because it's totally the latter. Seriously, I dare one of the Koch brothers to show up here within Molotov-throwing range of me.

A plan. I love it when plans come together.

My sense of humor. It's not always the best, but being a member of the American middle class, I don't think I'd survive for very long without it.

And I would be lying if I said I wouldn't severely miss a computer with internet connection.


There's a meme floating around that asks something along the lines of, "If you were a demon, what 3 items would I need to summon you?" I think my reagents would be a tray of lasagna, a handful of batteries, and a copy of Thus Spoke Zarathustra. Glowsticks instead of candles.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Mostly, trying to figure out what technical field I care about enough, that's simultaneously engaging, profitable, and somehow humanitarian, to either self-teach or go back to school for so I don't get stuck in a company I like but an industry I have no interest in.

I mean, I also think about the standard things like sex, pizza, video games, and current events, too, but somewhat less so. Fun fact, I finally started treatment for depression and it's been amazing for my quality of life, but it means I care much less than I used to about things I can't get my hands on and affect directly. Hell, going a day without actually really thinking about anything really feels fantastic sometimes. So other than church/state and the occasional labor-oriented initiative, I try to ease off politics except as a source of punchlines. As a wise man once said, it's easy to be a comedian when you've got the whole government working for you. On a daily basis, though, I try to keep my eyes peeled for ways to be a better friend and citizen.
On a typical Friday night I am
Almost invariably, awake until just before dawn, with Netflix, my Steam library, a tall mug of fruit punch, and the next section of either my campaign or some other ongoing project. Also, surrounded by notebooks full of scribbling as the ideas trickle in.
You should message me if
Basically, if you're not a bot and you're not hunting for either a unicorn or some similar commitment. I've largely given up on the prospect of online dating at this point, but I'm down for just about anything as long as you're upfront about it. I'll always meet people here halfway, partially out of courtesy, partially for the novelty, and always out of curiosity to see what happens next.