36 Portland, United States
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What I’m doing with my life
Failing forward.Taken from the book of the same name. It's a good read, if a bit preachy... I've been a "career bohemian" my entire professional life. My mom wanted me to go into pharmaceutical sales because there's a lot of money there. I work for an anti pharmaceutical company instead...

Full time job 1: I am the sales director/company cat herder/bad cop/realist for an "anti-pharmaceutical" company. Food *is* medicine and I speak several languages. It's also a cutthroat business because that's what happens when food is industrialized and taken for granted.

Full time job 2:Finding a romantic partner.It's a job because the dating culture in Portland is not nurturing. It's pretty materialistic, like NYC, unfortunately.


Playing bass. It's the instrument that makes music groove like a clock. Sometimes I play for money. I'm a non-stereotypical musician with a real day job. I did grow up playing in 18th and 19th century cover bands. They're called orchestras.

Being terminally funny, 90% of the time.
I’m really good at
Taking risks when the odds are so badly stacked against it. For better and worse, but lately for better.

Providing a pleasing musical throb.

Captivating live (not dead/undead) audiences.

Not taking no for an answer. To the death!

Being patient. Also to the death!

Not dumbing it down.

Writing thoughtfully and well.
The first things people usually notice about me
My eyes and my kind face.I think it causes people to open up to me. I don't look my ageand I'm told I do the bald look pretty well, so that's something. I am more physically attractive in person.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Non-fiction. Quite esoteric.

Movies: Wiki 1987 for movies.

Shows: TV or Broadway?

Music: Discuss. I have played classical, jazz (fusion, latin, standards, classics), and many styles of rock and roll. Queen is my favorite band.

Food: Primal.The only vegans I will eat are free-range and soy-free, and good luck finding that will all the TVP around...

None of this stuff matters -- I'm not out for a female clone with my artistic taste/sensibility...can't we share different stuff?
The six things I could never do without
Why not call this box "The six people in your life I could never do without"??

So in that case:

1) My boss.

2) My folks -- I still learn a lot from them and they're quietly extraordinary people.

3) My brother, who I also learn a lot from. Unfortunately we're on divergent paths at the moment, but such is life.

4) Anyone I can make a genuine connection with.

5) A great drummer.

6) The people I work with.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
An unintended consequence of mutual-gender-independence: mutual-gender-objectification, and the devaluation of romantic relationships.

That the word "independent" is the most overused selling point which is actually a non-selling point because in a dating context the term actually means "I'm super selfish and you will have to conform perfectly to me." You know, it's like the word "inconceivable" -- "I do not think it means what you think it means"...
On a typical Friday night I am
Winding down...but sometimes I have a gig and then Friday night turns into Saturday morning...
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I like things that are meant to last for decades. My phone will have been in my possession for 10 years in January of '17...
You should message me if
Nobody "should" do anything.

All bets are off, and no, I won't meet you for coffee. Meeting for coffee ought to be for date 2,391,593.87 or never, because it's an activity for people to stay in their "comfort zone" by listening and looking for non-negotiable deal breakers with the least amount of effort and risk possible.

People want to know why becoming involved in romantic endeavors isn't as easy as it was in our teens and is simple: life experience comes at the price of fear and insecurity driven by fear. It would be so much easier if people weren't scared/scarred shitless.