Grew up in Berkeley 1960-
I have worked as an Alexander teacher, opera-singer and librarian.
Was married for 12 years, helped raise two stepkids.
I am funny, bright, affectionate, tactile, and odd.
After two, much too long, relationships I am trying to reconnect with my romantic/erotic potential. I really want a loving, long term partner, but I know I have to be more open, fearless and available to make progress in that direction.
Some Bad News:
I am officially disabled due to vision trouble, but am working towards employment again. UPDATE: as of mid April, I'm reentering the world of the employed, though only on weekends and not terribly well remunerated.
I offer nothing in the way of money, property or prestige. Not about to have my picture taken at Machu Picchu.
I am too old to try to pass for normal/ordinary. My ex-spouse once described me as a 'heterosexual femme top,' A while back I described myself to an OKC member as 'A goddess-addled lust-puppy.' While I don't think either label is perfect, it should give some sense of how out of step I feel among 'straight' people.
Lost 75% of my sight in 2012. Emergency surgery saved what is left, but my finances and work prospects were ruined.
I have landed in the remains of the safety net, and I don't believe I will be stuck here forever.
I read, study, work out, cook, shop etc. I share a great deal with my large circle of friends. And of course, I'm looking for a loving partner.
Researching, problem solving, information seeking, listening, touching, kissing.....
Singing and acting were work, but I was good enough to get by professionally.
My height; I am just six feet tall, but people tend to overestimate that. 28 years of Alexander Technique probably accounts for that.
Bird, Monk, Ellington (the two-bass and Blanton/Webster bands, not the kitschy 'suites' from the 50s) Zoot Sims, Pee Wee Russell. Songs by Schubert, Brahms, Alec Wilder, Strayhorn. And so on.
Opera: Fidelio, Mozart/DaPonte, late Verdi, Rosenkavalier. And so on.
Films: Notorious/Bound (I'm linking them because both hinge on surrender to trust, love and desire), The Third Man (I used to identify with Holly Martins, now I recognize him as a schmuck) Hannah and Her Sisters, 'M,' Fargo, Miller's Crossing, A Serious Man (not Barton Fink, No Country for Old Men). Anything by John Sayles, anything with Natasha Richardson, Jean Arthur or Helen Mirren. And so on. Finally saw 'Wings of Desire,' certainly worth including here.
I've just binge-watched the whole of 'Catastrophe,' now well known as Carrie Fisher's last gig. This is really terrific writing, painfully funny especially if you have 'inside' knowledge.
I finally read the novel 'Laura' by Vera Caspary, appreciating how angry she was at the way the film undercut the strength of the title character.
'Strange Gods: A Secular History of Conversion.' by Susan Jacoby. A sort of follow-up to her memoir 'Half Jew.'
'Indirect Procedures: A Musician's Guide to the Alexander Technique.' Pedro de Alcantara
'Sweetness and Power: The Place of Sugar in Modern History.' Sidney W. Mintz.
Mary McCarthy, 'How I Grew' and 'Venice Observed.'
Mary Karr's 'Lit.' and Sarah Hepola's 'Blackout.'
The first a little odd-tasting, though I'll read her other memoirs. Hepola's tale is on a level with Carolyn Knapp, a hugely brave story of alcohol, with the especial focus on women and sex. Terribly sad, though she is funny and frank throughout.
Old favorites: Aubrey/Maturin, Orwell (esp. the collected letters and essays) Pratchett, Chandler etc.
Finished 'Sex at Dawn.' While not entirely convincing about the authors' notions of human behavior, it IS convincing in showing how unreliable our assumptions about 'natural' behavior really are. The book is much too long and sloppy for its message.
Web: 'Arts and Letters Daily,' 'Butterflies and Wheels.' 'Greta Christina,' Dawkins, Slate etc.
Food: love multiple varieties, used to cook for spouse and kids. Nowadays I have to eat pretty stringently low-carbohydrate, which makes dining a poor bonding activity.
The company of a loving fellowship of friends.
Freedom from the need to drink.
Music (I may even play or sing again)
My odd family.
The affection and desire of a loving partner.
And...I'm told that making petty changes in one's profile will increase one's visibiity.
If you actually would like to meet. The language of singles ads just doesn't convey enough for us to know what to make of each other.
A simple, safe meeting, with lots of convenient exits for discrete escape, ought to be a reasonable thing.
PS: the 'I'm looking for' is too rigid about age ranges and intentions, please don't feel excluded by the numbers or roles.
(and it's a good sign if you read this far...)