28Los Angeles, United States
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My self-summary
*Oct 2014 update: and yet another failed attempt at something serious. So I am back on here again in search of that which is ever-fleeting and quite possibly unattainable since it seems that many people have the sinful habit of being disloyal, uncommitted, or all together, lack integrity.*

Contrary to what it says, I dont think I reply very selectively. I always reply, but I take a little longer than most people I suppose to actually reply seeing as how I get busy. And As far as for the past year or so, I was taken so if I did not get back to you that was the reason why, I will be doing my best to catch up on missed messages. I am also aware that my profile is long, must we bring that up? If anything, read the private admissions and the "you should message me if" sections if nothing else. With that out of the way...

I am a hopeless romantic, an old soul, and have a youth's heart. I ask that you not waste my time and lead me on to believe you are interested in something long term if you do not even know what it is you want in someone.

I'll go on by saying that it is unfathomable for me to summarize myself through empty words of a profile; words themselves are only what we want them to mean. Not only that, but most often these things are full of self-praise and portraying oneself in the best light possible. I'd like to take the time to counter this and tell you upfront that I am not always shining in a positive light. I am human, I make mistakes, I have flaws, I am aware of my shortcomings. I do not presume to be someone who is out of error's way. With this modesty I ask of you to think of me as simply someone who speaks with candor in an earnest attempt to tell you who I am not by deception but rather by acknowledging my pitfalls and weaknesses.

In concordance with what's been said, I am a Trojan Alum, I am a good friend, a good listener, witty, funny, bitchy, a sweetheart, a dick, sarcastic, kind, vicious, timid, a nerd, an athlete; I am everything in one- the alchemy of human kind. I can be anything from any spectrum and any arrangement of said degrees. I don't take myself lightly nor do I expect others to do so. I have a lot to say all the time and find myself in constant thought. I analyze and critique everything because critical thinking is what is lacking in this day and age; the opiate of the masses is immediate gratification.

I could go on ranting about, what are more than likely to you all, unimportant or tangent subjects, or you could take your chances and send me a word. I don't take too kindly to people interested in the mere physicality of human interaction so please come equipped with conversation and some form of a stimulated mind.


Ladies, if you had any trepidation upon seeing "bisexual" go to my "private admissions" section read 1, 3a, & 3b and leave my page if 3b applies to you. Guys too, but it seems ladies have more issues with it than guys do.

Oh, and yes I know this sounds pretentious or who knows what else you could characterize this as, but I tend to be someone that speaks with all sincerity even if others do not wish to hear how it is. I am not afraid to say what I think and/or feel. I am not arrogant whatsoever but I believe in being confident in one's convictions so please don't take any of this the wrong way. Just take the time to actually get to know the real me and not just pictures and words on a screen.
What I’m doing with my life
Completed my three B.A.'s at USC. Then my life made a huge transition. Was most recently a Grad student working toward my Master's Degree at the USC School of Social Work. I have been accustomed to the life of a student (which at times hasn't been all that great), so beginning my professional career is something I have been eagerly anticipating. I am happy to say that at long last I have finally reached my objective!

I've interned with a non-profit org. that helps place kids in foster care, for the ONE Institute, at a community mental health facility all while working in the fitness and health industry at a gym. I was last working for a school district as a School Social Worker and I volunteer a part of my free time in promoting higher education to high school students in the community I was raised in.

It is time to start job hunting again though since I can now add three little letters to the end of my name. ;)
I’m really good at
I am a fairly good judge of character. I can read a person's emotions and behaviors easily and usually accurately. Obviously there are a few times where it fails and I have it all wrong -after-all I'm not a mind reader.

I love to talk. I am pretty friendly once the ball is rolling. I am very easy to talk to and you can approach me with just about anything and find that I will give you my honest opinion and sometimes some really good insight (up to you if you want to take my advice or not). This comes from my passion of helping people really.

I've been through a lot of bad things in my life so I know what it is like to face adversity. In some ways I would say I am good at being resilient and rising above trials and tribulations. Because of my past, I am very passionate about helping others who may be in the position i was in, or feel the way that I once felt. This is my motivation for waking up every day. This is why I am going to school. If I make a difference in at least one person's life, or they come to me and leave knowing that I genuinely care and want to help them, then my life was worth living.

I also have an affinity for poetry (both reading and writing). I'm not "really good at" it, but I was published once and people who I have shown my work to tend to show at least some interest. I'm very selective of who I allow to read my work but this is a stanza of one of my pieces:

Snow covered body lies still,
frigid and forgotten before.
Sun's lips never letting you feel
the love of another's will to adore.
This winter you will be my spring renewal,
youthful deed awaits our ignition; our fuel.
And then these are a Haiku and Tanka that I recently wrote:

Cavernous echoes
are left behind in my heart
new paths to be carved

That feeling is gone
of gentle and breezed comfort
that came from their breath.
The irony of heartache:
remedy's found in mistake.
The first things people usually notice about me
That can depend on what the person is looking for.

If they are solely looking at my appearance I believe that they'll tend to notice my lips.

If they are interested in being my friend and overlook appearance they usually notice that I'm shy off the bat but once the ball is up in the air my personality truly comes out and I tend to be a very good and extremely loyal friend. :)

Another thing that is often noted is that I always give 100% when I am getting to know someone in the romantic sense and expect the same in return. I dont play games and I dont want anyone that cant afford to put in an equal amount of effort.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Music:I am a music WHORE. CAPS=LOVE THEM lol. LOVE MARILYN MANSON. CRADLE OF FILTH. NO DOUBT. PLACEBO. EMILIE AUTUMN. ALICIA KEYS. MICHAEL JACKSON. 30 seconds to Mars, 8 MM, AFI, Abba, The Academy is, ADELE, Alanis Morisette, THE ALL AMERICAN-REJECTS, Amy Winehouse, Anna Nalick, Annie Lennox, Arch Enemy, Armor for Sleep, Audioslave, Aural Vampire, Autour de Lucie, Aventura, Bangles, Barbara, Bee Gees, Bella Morte, Ben's Brothers, Berlin, Beyonce, Blondie, BLUE OCTOBER, Bob Marley, BRIGHT EYES, Bruno Mars, Cake, Calexico, Caliban, Carla Bruni, Carrie Underwood, Celine Dion, CHER, Chevelle, Chris Brown. Christian Death, CHRISTINA AGUILERA, CHRISTOPHE WILLEM, Cindy Lauper, City and Color, The Cliks, Cœur de Pirate, Colbie Callait, COLDPLAY, Cruxshadows, Crystal Castles, DALIDA, Damien Rice, David bowie, DEPECHE MODE, Danny Elfman, Diana Ross, Dixie Chicks, Donna Summers, Dream Theatre, Dresden Dolls, DUFFY, EDITH PIAF, Eminem, Epica, Evanescence, Faith Hill, Fear Factory, Fedde Le Grand, FIONA APPLE, Flee the Seen, Flobots, FLORENCE + THE MACHINE, Fly Leaf, Freezepop, From First to Last, Garbage, Gossip, Grégoire, Grouplove, GWEN STEFANI, Hawthorne Heights, Hellogoodbye, Herbie Hancock, Hoobastank, Ion Dissonance, Iron & Wine, Jack Johnson, Jason Mraz, Jessie J, Jewel, Joan Sebastian, Joanna Newsome, Joe, John Lennon, Johnny Cash, The Juliana Theory, Justin Timberlake, Katy Perry, Keith Martin, Kelly Clarkson Kerli, Keyshia Cole, Kill Hannah, Klaxons, KORN, La Quinta Estacion, La Roux, Lady Antebellum, LADY GAGA, Laura Marling, Leave's Eyes, Leela james, Leona Lewis, Lifehouse, Lily Allen, Linda Ronstat, Lucinda Williams, Lykke Li, MADONNA, MARIAH CAREY, Mario, Mark Ronson, The Mars Volta, Marvin Gaye, MARY J. BLIGE, Melanie Fiona, Melody Gardot, Mest, Metro Station, Michael Buble, Modern English, Motion City Soundtrack, Moving Units, MUSE, My Chemical Romance, My Last Mistake, Nat King Cole, NATALIE IMBRUGLIA, Ne-yo, Neon, Nero, NEVERENDING WHITE LIGHTS, New Order, NIGHTWISH, NINE INCH NAILS, Nirvana, Novaspace, Oasis, Parlor Mob, Pedro Fernandez, P!NK, Plain White T's, PORTISHEAD, The Postal Service, Prince Royce, PRINCE, Queen, R. Kelly, Radiohead, Rasmus, REGINA SPEKTOR, Remy, Rihanna, Rob Zombie, Sarah Mclauchlin, Sarina Paris, Savage Garden, The Script, Selena, Selena Gomez, Senses Fail, Serena Ryder, SHAKIRA, Sheryfa Luna, Sheryl Crow, Shiny Toy Guns, SIA, Silverstein, Simple Plan, Sixpence None the Richer, Skeletonwitch, Slipknot, Smashing Pumpkins, Snow Patrol, So They Say, Soko, Stacey Kent, Stan Getz, Static X, Stevie Wonder, Story of the Year, Sugarcult, System of a Down, TAKING BACK SUNDAY, Taylor Swift, Thalia, The Ting Tings, Tool, Tori Amos, Trey Songz, Tycho, UnderOath, VV Brown, Venus Hum, Vicente Fernandez, Weather Girls, Weezer, Wicked soundtrack, WITHIN TEMPTATION, Xtreme, Yael Naim, YELLE, Zaho, The Zanibar Aliens, Zeromancer.
and soo much more haha but again, you will learn more with time

Books: The Perks of Being a Wall-Flower (10/12 update: I read it in '05 way before anyone knew about it), Rainbow Boys, The Tragedy of Miss Geneva Flowers, Stone Butch Blues, Gender Trouble, What Becomes You, She's Not There, The Feminine Mystique, Bitchfest, Female Chauvinist Pigs, The Second Shift, Promises I Can Keep, Flat Broke With Children, Guyland, Harry Potter, The Devil Wears Prada, Animorphs, Goosebumps, To Kill a Mockingbird, The Crucible, Wuthering Heights, The Scarlet Letter, House of the Seven Gables, Death of a Salesman, Wicked, Night, Dogs of Babel.

Poetry: Anything by Emily Dickinson, Sylvia Plath, Robert Frost, Shakespeare, Maya Angelou, Emerson, and Andrew Marvell

TV: I don't really watch much TV but I do love certain shows. Modern Family, American Horror Story, Once Upon a Time, Criminal Minds, Big Bang Theory, X-men (90's animated series), Full House, The Simpsons, Family Guy, Best Ink, LA Ink, Charmed, and maybe one or two more. I don't really watch any religiously except for those that are highlighted.
Six things I could never do without
1. love
2. friends
3. gym
4. queer, feminist, gender or any kind of critical theory
5. music
6. diversity

In no particular order of course. Dont ask me to put them in a relevant order because that would complicate things greatly lol
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Find out
On a typical Friday night I am
When school was in session I did not do anything during my weekends except read, read, read, eat, shower, read, eat some more, use the restroom a few times here and there, and oh yea read. My Master's Program was dense with reading and writing haha. I had time to be both single and in a relationship while in my graduate program, so I can say that when I am in a relationship my Friday nights would consist of the same thing and the weekend would include my significant other in some manner. Whether that was going out some place or staying in. I prefer the staying in; I am more of a homebody and enjoy watching movies, talking, playing games (both old school board games and new wave video gaming), cooking together, etc.

Seeing as I have been a full time student and was working, I didn't really have much time for going out. So I would also take the liberty of spending my Friday evenings working out and then coming home to read or watch a movie; I find it rather relaxing and it gives me time to think and reflect.

Given that I am done with my Master's Program, I guess my Fridays and weekends will have some changes soon :). We make time for the things that we want and value, regardless of how "busy" we are.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
They aren't really private but they're pretty personal facts:

1a. I mostly identify as Gender Queer but okcupid doesn't have that so "bi" is the closest "label" to give you a slight idea of who I am. If you don't know what this means just ask!
1b. Other gender queer/gender neutral people are definitely Cool in my book.
1c. I have an inexplicable attraction and gravitational pull to FTM people :]

2. For me, Love is the most important value. Love for humanity, family, friends, partners, lovers, pets, the world, etc. you don't know what life is truly about until you've felt the duality of Love.

3a. When it comes to dating I DON'T DISCRIMINATE based on sex, race, creed, class, sexuality, gender performance, gender identity or other socially constructed labels.
3b. If you have some prejudices we probably wont work out. Especially ladies, if y'all have some issues with sexuality being fluid, we wont get along. This has nothing to do with my ability to be monogamous and loyal!! I was at one point in a 4 year monogamous relationship so don't get it twisted.

4. (slight contradiction from 3): when it comes to health and taking care of your body I believe there is no excuse to avoid working out even if its just jogging 3 days a week. Meaning: I like my significant other to be fit & healthy. Not necessarily super slim or built, just fit and not overweight nor obese.

5. A lie is a lie regardless of what it is. I don't give second chances once you lie. It is difficult for me to keep trusting you if you break that trust.

6. I want someone who wants me like they want a wine bottle: to keep for a long time to get better with age.

7. I am very open minded and I mean in every way. I will try ANYTHING once if I am curious about it.

8. I actually read your ENTIRE profile when I visit your page.

9a. I prefer cuddling and affection over sex hands-down.
9b. If you don't like affection or aren't into being held or holding someone in public, you aren't for me.

10a. If I message you it's because I'm genuinely interested in you in some way. Whether that's as a potential friend or more if you are equally interested.
10b. Sometimes I'm too nervous or insecure to be the first to message so feel free to take the first step!

11a. People that don't drive annoy me when making date plans.
11b. People that try to get at me but live too far for anything serious to develop leave me like "why you even trying?"

12. You being all into god is fine just don't try to impose any of it onto me; I will be insulted by your disrespect of my beliefs and therefore lose any respect I had for you for trying to "convert me."

13. I am scared of heights and while I like walking around most theme parks (especially halloween time) the only one where Ill ride em all is Disneyland.

14. Would love if a girl or guy took me out on a date to a Dodger or LAker game

15. Halloween is the best and I listen to x-mas music beginning Nov. until Jan 1. I love the season spirit.

16a. I LOVE tattoos and getting tatted (I have 11 pieces and a sleeve that's in progress).
16b. If you have tattoos chances are I'll find them attractive and you'll get points for that
16c. Sleeves and plugs are major turn ons but not necessary :).

17. I love the smell of Crayola crayons and old books.

18. I find intelligence to be THE sexiest thing about someone's personality. So long as it isn't coupled with condescendence or arrogance.

19. Another thing that gets you points is if you are good with kids. A family of my own is what I'm aiming for in life so if you got what it takes, I'm all yours.

20. Oddly enough, I usually find myself attracted to the very signs that are astrologically incompatible with me: Taurus and Scorpio. These arent the only signs I'm attracted to though lol

21. I have a great dislike toward make up. I'm sorry but I'd rather see someone for who they are naturally, not some mask. Not to mention that excessive make up use will age you both short term and long term.

22. I love to write Poetry as I mentioned above, and often utter words of motivation or advice in a very poetic fashion given the right circumstances.

23. I love waists in general. If I can grab a hold of your waist within the grasp of my hand while walking, cuddling, or other= major plus

24. Im the type of person that will make you pick up the tab for the date if you pick up your phone at all during the date; It is RUDE!

25. My biggest fear is that I will die: a) a failure in life and b) alone with no one who truly cares about me as a person.
You should message me if
*--PLEASE READ THIS SECTION THOROUGHLY! Be advised that the content and quality of your messages will dictate the kind of response you will receive.--*

I must warn you that my standards are exceptionally particular, but that should not dissuade you from contacting me if you'd like to :). Yes I am aware that this may make me seem finicky and like i exclude people, but to be honest I'd rather be upfront and let you know if I am not interested in talking with you. For the most part however I am generally very open to making all kinds of friends.

*Second is this disclaimer*: DO NOT MESSAGE me if you are looking to get laid instantaneously. I, like most people, do enjoy sex but I am not one to sleep with just anyone or have meaningless sex. I am not looking for anyone 15+ years my older so don't even bother contacting me if you are because we have nothing to talk about seeing as how the generational difference brings about a gap. If you are looking for friendship, doesnt matter where you are but if you are attempting to pursue anything more than that be at least within a 25-30 mile radius please.

There is more than one category that you could fit into and therefore would entail different standards for contacting me. First and foremost comes friendship so even if you are interested in anything else you must at least meet the basic criteria for why you should message me:

- if you think we have something in common
- you'd like to ask me more about myself
- you have a particular question to ask
- you can provide amazing conversation
- or any other platonic reasoning.

For those of you that are seeking more, aside from the above you should only message me if:

- You are sincere with your intentions (be they pure or not)
- You maintain a sense of dignity and respect if I am not interested in you
- Your personality is your best feature
- You can articulate yourself and your thoughts concisely and bluntly
- You have all of your affairs in order (layman's terms: you have your shit put together and you are responsible {responsible includes no hard core drug usage or other reckless habits that could impair having a good relationship})
- You aren't hung up on your ex
- And you do not think you are gracing me with simply considering to talk to me -because I will tell you right now that if you think you are, then you are already off to a bad start; arrogance is a huge turn off.

I have found myself asking people what it is they look for in someone and so I figured that I should just put what I look for in someone who is of great potential for an actual and serious relationship:

I like people who are intelligent (preferably college educated, but not 100% necessary), responsible, goal-oriented, ambitious, have a set career path in mind, hard workers with good work ethic, aren't into partying and drugs. I like when someone is able to communicate effectively even when there are disagreements or problems. Someone that will be unabashedly honest no matter what the situation even if it means that I may be a little hurt (I would rather be hurt by truth than by deception), they are someone that can be trusted, are faithful and committed. Someone that at the end of the day is going to be a caring person that is passionate and devoted to things they believe in and is not materialistic or concerned with superficial things.

I don't like drama unless it's a tv show or movie genre, so I don't intend to be with anyone that invites drama into their life. I love affection so any person that is with me MUST BE OK with affection. If someone has a problem with holding my hand in public then that person and I would not get along very well. I don't go clubbing or drinking every weekend, every other weekend, nor once a month; it is something I rarely do actually and intend on keeping it that way.

I just want someone that is going to accept me for who I am and like me for that, not for my looks, my car, my money, my clothes, or whatever other shallow reason. I would like to find someone that knows the meaning of commitment because I would ideally like to have a long term relationship. And to be honest, yes I would also look for marriage material along the way in that long term relationship. I would like to one day get married and have a family so that is also something the person must want. If they don't see themselves wanting marriage or a family down the line, then I wouldn't want to waste their time nor my time because we wouldn't have the same goals in mind and it would simply be a waste.

See, I'm not THAT complicated lmao. Like I said, I know EXACTLY what I want. Obviously I know that perfection is not attainable so I don't expect someone to be able to fulfill all of these. However I do expect someone that is overall a decent person and is always open for improving themselves, learning, and growing.
The two of us