42Los Altos, United States
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
My self-summary
I am two fools, I know
For loving and for saying so
In whining poetry
But where's that wise man, that would not be I
If she would not deny?

A mixture of Saxon, Viking and Celt, my dreams are filled with images of tall, pale men hacking each other to death in the rain. Well, not really, but it's an amusing conceit.

My plurality of interests are often met with incomprehension and/or disbelief: the idea that I should enjoy lifting weights, martial arts, playing Chopin, reading philosophy, making furniture etc. seems strange to a lot of people. My response to such puzzlement is "Why should I limit myself?" A question I am frequently asked is "How do you know that?", to which I am tempted to snarkily reply that I have outsourced the majority of my cognition to the Third World, conjuring up a grotesque image of underpaid workers hooked up to neural shunts, delivering the knowledge I want on demand.
What I’m doing with my life
"Going to and fro in the Earth and up and down in it": Satan's response to Jehovah when asked a similarly inane question, as described in the Book of Job.
Wondering why half the women on this site need to point out that they "love to laugh". As opposed to what, exactly?- "I love to inject myself with black tar heroin when my mental and physical anguish become unendurable"..
Currently learning Chopin's Ballade in G minor, which is both beautiful and very difficult.
I’m really good at
Playing piano, cooking, fixing things, writing satirical poetry, flying side kicks, inverted pull ups, forcing corporations to pay for mending their faulty products (Take that, Marin Bikes! You sell me a bike whose frame cracks after a year and you want me to pay for the repair? Oh no...)
The first things people usually notice about me
My height, my British accent, my resemblance to a certain Tom Hanks. Regarding the latter, I would argue that it is in fact he who resembles me and the cheeky bastard has been using my face for years, making millions of dollars in the process. He'll be hearing from my lawyers, mark my words!
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: Before the Dawn, by Nicholas Wade (the best account of human evolution I have ever read); The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, by Douglas Adams (hilarious and brilliantly predictive), Notes from Underground, by Dostoyevsky (a superb psychologist- even Nietzsche was impressed), Brave New World, by Aldous Huxley (very funny and intelligent), Titus Alone, by Mervyn Peake (uniquely strange and wonderful), Denial of Death, by Ernest Becker (explains our species' silliness very well); The Black Swan, by Nassim Nicholas Talib (thanks to him I have "come out" as a skeptical empiricist: I feel much better); The Handmaid's Tale, by Margaret Atwood (like 1984, but scarier, because in her scenario, it's the Christian Evangelicals who've taken over- the horror!)

Poets: John Donne, Shakespeare, Omar Khayyam, Hafez, Dylan Thomas, John Keats, W.B. Yeats

Movies: The Life of Brian, The Godfather, Boondock Saints, V for Vendetta, Pulp Fiction, Cuckoo, The Gods must be crazy..

Shows: Dexter, Blackadder, The Daily Show, Frasier, The Wire, Six Feet Under, The Shield, Breaking Bad (yes, I know it's popular, but it is also quite brilliant).

Music: Gesualdo, Orlando Gibbons, Purcell, Bach, Beethoven, Chopin, Ravel, Satie, Fats Waller, Tom Lehrer, Jimi Hendrix, The Doors, Velvet Underground, Led Zeppelin, Kate Bush, Leonard Cohen

Food: I like a lot of different cuisines, but I will not tolerate anything involving Brussels sprouts: they are the work of Beelzebub
Six things I could never do without
Silly questions from dating sites. More, please!
My piano.
My bike.
Books (I really lose the plot without something decent to read).
Good food and drink.
Intelligent conversation.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
How people can get excited watching a bunch of overpaid jocks chase a ball around a field. Dogs are much better at this.

The power of normality: In the past, absolute monarchies, slavery, burning witches etc. were commonplace and very few questioned these things. Currently, the mutilation of infant boys, circumcision, is seen as perfectly acceptable. It is not.

Why ostensibly intelligent people think it not only acceptable, but admirable to drive overpowered cars. I speed past these people on my bike whilst they are stuck in traffic and burning gas and can't help but think they are morons.

Religion: original sin, jihad, genital mutilation, sexual repression, caste systems, misogyny... Come on people, grow up, open your eyes and realize that even if there was a god, you're only projecting your own absurd conjectures upon a being who would, of necessity, have to be a lot smarter than you! Why can't I give up the silly habit of expecting rationality from an irrational species? It's as stupid as expecting tigers to adopt veganism: "Growl! I am tired of being a predator and in any case, it is an ethically dubious practice. Please direct me to the nearest Tofu House."

If you've got this far, you may have realized that I spend a lot of time thinking.
On a typical Friday night I am
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
The area I live in is rich, pretty and dull. I am neither rich nor pretty...
I'm a fan of Pope Francis: it's the first time that atheists have had a pope and it's really quite exciting.
You should message me if
You want to catch me while I'm still warm. I've cheated Death a few times and he's starting to get rather annoyed.
You have sufficient wit to realize that a lot of what I have written is satirical, much of it self-directed.
Your self summary does not read like one of Oprah's homilies.
Your ideal man is not a Trappist eunuch: someone I met on this site was quite upset by my occasional desire for conversation and so on.
The two of us