48Kinshasa, Democratic Republic of the Congo
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My self-summary
I asked my three best friends to help me out on this. The first one said I was a combination of Einstein, Gandhi, and Elvis, in that I had the IQ of Elvis, the sex appeal of Einstein, and the wealth of Gandhi. The second, a prison guard, said he’d "reckoned he’d known worse," while the third looked at me blearily from his bar stool and said, “Do I know you?”

Clearly I am going to have to do this on my own.

I'm literary and political. I think about right brain stuff with my left brain, and left brain stuff with my right. My high school aptitude test said I should be a philologist. I've smoked pot twice: once with Allen Ginsburg and once with pygmies in the Congo. I care about the way sentences are put together, the secrets to making a good paper airplane, and the fate of the seahorse. I sometimes wonder what line of poetry or prose I would get tattooed on me, were I the sort to do that sort of thing. Oh, and I have a daughter, adopted from China. The first time we met, I felt I had my whole life been a bell, and not known it until at that moment I was lifted and struck.
What I’m doing with my life
Well, I just killed an hour or so running famous quotes through several languages on the google translate machine before recapitulating them into English. Here's what OkC's most frequently cited poem sounds like after a run thru Hungarian, Chinese, Welsh and Gujarati:

Destroying observation, such as "Do you dance in the car!
If you've never been hurt, like, love
There is no way to play, do not ask
Live like it's heaven and on earth.
I’m really good at
Filling out small text boxes.

Using "Whom." This is--and I'm not making this up--supposed to be catnip to the ladies. A recent study showed that "men who use 'whom' in their profiles are 37% more likely to get responses, regardless of whether they used it correctly." So to all you lonely ladies out there: Whom loves you, baby?
The first things people usually notice about me
The complexity of my syntax.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Wouldn't it be more fun to talk about what we dislike? Can't we hit it off by having common aversions? You'd flee the country if we had a Trump administration? (BTW, I am a dual Canadian citizenship, so this is definitely feasible.) You thought Forrest Gump was a sentimental sinkhole? Let's get it on....

But, fwiw, I have crushes on Zadie Smith, Tina Fey, Elizabeth Warren, and Christina Hendricks; love the writings of Alice Munro and Donald Justice; and rock out to Glenn Gould and Sergei Rachmaninoff. I read and reread the first two pages of the Sun Also Rises and the last three of Ulysses; groove to the music of Rachel's and Toumani Diabate; and recalibrate my sanity via liberal doses of Jon Stewart and Paul Krugman. My fortress of solitude is located on an island off the coast of Kenya. And I like trees, both sedulous and seditious.
On a typical Friday night I am
Perusing OKCupid, apparently.
You should message me if
You're one of us.

You're in this to get out of it, permanently. I am.
The two of us