31Amherst, United States
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My self-summary
Hello the internet! I'm a human type person. I'm big on making people I care about laugh and I love to tell stories. I answer quiz questions on here compulsively, and I do it rapidly without thinking about it too much. Depending on my mood when I do it, the answers can wobble a bit. So, uh, I guess ask me for clarification if something seems weird in there.

I live with a bunch of friends out in the wonderful land of Amherst and enjoy all sorts of awesome stuff. As long as your definition of awesome involved games, movies, and books. Otherwise not much awesome at all, I guess. Although I do sometimes wander out into the wild, for walks in the woods and the occasional fishing trip.

I'm a predominately nocturnal creature, owing to some sleep disorders, so you can often find me in the wee hours being bitter about the notion of "business hours."

I have a Steam library that is uncomfortably large for someone as broke as myself. If you are a Steam user, feel free to send me a message on that platform of addiction.

Those other sections below will provide additional facts about me, so I'll stop rambling here.
What I’m doing with my life
Sometimes I am sculpting, molding, and casting. Creating strange idols to Lovecraftian gods and other things with wiggly bits. I do special effects make-up to make people into monsters or bloody chunks whenever I get the chance.

I also design, mostly for a local screen printer, but I can't draw to save my life, so I am a bit limited in this field, but it hasn't stopped me so far.

Thanks to being stuck in reality, I also sit behind a desk sometimes and generate money by virtue of occupying that space. It is a very exciting job, tending a desk and being sure that everyone who walks into the building belongs there, but it also lets me do OTHER work while I do it. It means I get paid to get paid!

I'm also poking around at teaching myself to make games, because why not? So far this has resulted in a dating simulation where you, as Thomas Wheeler, have to date Obama to secure your position as FCC Chair.

Most of these pursuits are geared towards eventually going to grad school, that way I can waste money on that and be a directionless person with a masters!
I’m really good at
I tell stories, many of them as legally incriminating as they are amusing, and I can riff a movie pretty good. Making people I care about laugh makes me feels nice, and people tell me I do it well. Even better is if they choke on their water in a non-fatal way, because that is hilarious.
The first things people usually notice about me
I have been told, on occasion, that I have a somewhat distinctive manner of moving. I tend to wobble and drift around, like I can't quite balance, which is funny since I almost always stand on one foot when I'm still. I like to think I'm just keeping myself off guard that way I can eventually fall and forget to hit the ground. Thus achieving flight.

They may also notice that I am not on fire and also wearing clothes.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
When it comes to books I am drawn by weird, strange, and alien worlds. Some authors who do this well are: China Meiville, Jeff VanderMeer, Jedediah Berry, Mark Z. Danielewski, Neal Stephenson, and of course H.P. Lovecraft. If I had to choose a few books by this lot, it would be Perdido Street Station, Kraken, City of Saints and Madmen, The Manual of Detection, and Anathem.

I watch SO MANY MOVIES, so this is tricky. Lets just say my tastes range from movies as bad as Troll 2 and all the way up to what I think of as incredible moves like The Fall and In Bruges. I love watching Rifftrax, and I think everyone should see Rubber at least once. Seriously, a killer tire in an absurd meta plot about movies? Must be seen. As for TV, similar standards, but with a massive lean toward cartoons. Cartoons like: Regular Show, The Amazing World of Gumball, The Misadventures of Flapjack, and Adventure time. Also I watch far too much anime.

I like to keep my music library varied in both genre and region, so I drift around a lot sonically. Instrumental, metal, progressive, trance, drum and bass, and so much more from around the world.

As for food, I love to try new things and keep an altar to Alton Brown in my kitchen. I range from fancy to totally delicious in a bad for you kind of way.
Six things I could never do without
1. My friends.

2. My family. While utterly insane and fucked up in a delightful number of ways, they are still a support structure and dearly loved by me.

3. Books.

4. Movies. TV as well, you know, moving pictures.

5. Games. This covers computer, video, board, card, and role playing games.

6. My backpack, I keep almost everything in there I need to survive or keep myself entertained. Including marbles for floor traps.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
If a teleporter obliterates your atoms and reassembles another set of atoms exactly the same somewhere else, did you die? Do you care, if on an atomic level, you are the same right down to the memories?

I also, of course, day dream endlessly about having magic powers and going on incredible inter-dimensional adventures. Who doesn't though, right?
On a typical Friday night I am
Generally I am playing games or watching movies with friends. Otherwise I am just enjoying some quiet time to myself by... playing a game or watching a movie. I have a bit of a theme here.

I could also be taking a walk or reading a book, gotta switch things up sometimes.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I have never seen The Godfather. I know. It's a horrible truth.
You should message me if
You want to! Or have questions! Or found a typo of some sort in here! Or know some terrible secret truth! The normal reasons.
The two of us