Warning: May contain mild to severe hatefulness.
Some time ago I took a tumble from a lofty and important position surrounded by other super-humans to descend and have to live with the rest of you. No words can fully encapsulate how unpleasant this experience is.
The difference between my IQ and that of the average human is the same as the difference between the average human and a trained gorilla, so for me, being with human beings is an inevitably frustrating experience, and the worst punishment that could possibly be inflicted upon me in poetic retribution for my monumental pride.
Please do not contact me to debate the relevance of standardized intelligence quotient tests, I probably know more about the subject than you do.
My intimidating intellectual prowess.
My rugged good looks.
In that order.
Yes, I wrote seven when it says to put six. I am a rebel.
* You are similarly furiously frustrated with the state of humanity.
* You cannot abide human beings.
* You find the above profile hilarious, entertaining, or enticing for reasons beyond my ken.
* You are a sexual deviant.
* You wish to summon and bind me to the completion of a monumental task in return for your mortal soul and/or a virgin. If you possess neither soul nor virginity, you probably know me quite well already, but I am sure we can come to some sort of arrangement.
* You have a sense of humour.