46Oakland, United States
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My self-summary

Despite all the BDSM-y stuff you may read below, I am a solid, trustworthy, intelligent, ethical, easy going, good natured guy interested in meaningful relationships. I have another profile here that outlines my vanilla side, but I thought to create this alternative in order to connect with someone "of my species," as it were.

Kink is an important facet of my sexual expression, but other aspects of my life make it impractical to wear on my sleeve. Despite the wonderful gains of relative social acceptance achieved by my open gay/bi/queer friends, a kinky lifestyle still seems to require a high amount of living in the closet. (Though, were it totally mainstream, might it not loose a bit of its transgressive appeal?)

And so... this adjunct profile.

If you choose to reply, I would be happy to direct you to my vanilla profile if you would like a more well-rounded perspective.

Though I am not beyond connecting with someone for purely kink-based explorations, I also welcome a firm, grounded relationship with a like-minded woman!


Dear Kink-Minded Stranger,

You have stumbled upon the OKC profile of a single, safe (RACK aware), sane, straight, respectful, responsible, stable, accountable, genuine, honest/trustworthy, ethical, creative, playful, polyamorous, sex-positive, open-minded, novelty-seeking, 12 + year experienced, cis-male Daddy/Dom.

Integrity and compassion are the virtues toward which I most strive.
A friend who knows me well once described my kink play style as "consistent, thoughtful, responsive, and devilishly compassionate."
A queer friend of mine also described me as a "bear-butch les-bro."

Were we to meet in person, you would probably find me an affable, articulate, intelligent, confident, and respectful-in-public kind of gentleman. I don't socially come out-of-the-gate with my Dom persona leading the way. (I find that kind of thing presumptuous and it rather goes against my standards for consent with a partner.) So... I won't slide a pair of handcuffs under the menu during a first date.

If we shared some coffee, you would encounter my everyday personality first. My inner Dom you might meet after negotiation and consent are established. (Some exception to this might be given depending on the type of energy you bring to the table however. I am open to light, playful Dom energy if it seem to suit the situation.)

I know that my face pic is necessarily lacking in detail. Some say I have a passing resemblance to Robert Downey Junior.
More images can be shared with you if you like.

I don't live it 24/7. I am not a lifestyle Dom. More suit, vest and tie than leather pants.
It is not an integral part of my overall personality. But BDSM play does lend an appreciable, undeniable sexual power and magic to my erotic life!

I am interested in connecting with a local, like-minded, submissive, wicked, wanton woman for mutually spirited, toe-curling, satisfying, sex-positive, kinky encounters including bondage, sensory play, resistance play, role-play, impact play, things taboo, sexy outfits, orgasm control and denial, and (quite possibly) whatever outlandishly kinky thing you are thinking about this very moment!

I seek inspired sessions of kink play and good natured kinship/friendship.

I am open to encounters with women new to kink - those willing to explore.

And again, to emphasize the point, I believe strongly in ethical actions in all manner of relationships.
I typically do not expect to share a meet-up with someone and then go straight to play, but rather prefer to casually get to know one another, share some edgy conversation, and if we seem to click, engage in further conversation that involves outlining our mutual wants and desires, limits, and safety concerns. I only engage in BDSM play after clear/free consent has been given.

I can provide contact information from prior partners if you might wish to contact them for a character references.
What I’m doing with my life
Professional dedication takes up most of my weekdays.
Nights and weekends are generally free for connections with friends and consensual debauchery!
Enjoy dance and travel.
I’m really good at
Salsa dance.
Tying knots.
Untying knots.
Making kick-ass gin & tonics!
Crafting a journey.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Secretary was great.

Fifty Shades I have not read. Nor will I. Not well written, from what I hear, and not a very authentic perspective on a real kink lifestyle. But if you liked it and it opened doors for you, that can only be a good thing.
Six things I could never do without
My hands
A flogger
I spend a lot of time thinking about
What you are allowed to eat: One scoop of creamed potatoes. A slice of butter. Four peas. And as much ice cream as you'd like to eat.
You should message me if
You have experience, or are a curious newbie.

I enjoy talking about this stuff, and would welcome connecting with folks interested in exploring their curiosity with the noncommittal potential/goal of sharing a real life encounter.

You are attractive and in relatively good shape (at least HWP), as am I.
The two of us