Well enough about my current events. My life is pretty rad I live at home with my mom in her attic. I get all the free food I want. Lows: she walks in on me pleasuring myself like every day totes annoying am I right? My bed is above her room so we will have to have our one night stand at your place.
What else... What else hmm oh I am now the current leader of an underground army set out to wage war on Storage units. We are thinking of making it into a reality show called Storage Wars. We sneak in to Storage facilities and slightly damage everyones stuff.
I also spend my free time trash diving looking for dog poop and putting it back on the street. I'm just doing my part to help out the homeless. Would you want your second hand food sitting next to some dog food?! I think not. You're welcome homeless. See I'm not a bad guy.
My photos are pretty old by the way. I am down to only one arm. I was juggling chainsaws at union square for money and well since i can't juggle I had a big accident and my heart goes out to all the people affected by my lack of experience. It was pretty pretty pretty messy. Its cool though I crafted a new arm it has a universal remote, a fork, steak knife, a feather for sensual touching, a big black dildo but thats mainly for structure, a sling shot (seriously comes in handy a lot), a subwoofer, an iPad, a walky talky that can only communicate with the voices in my head, a unicycle repair kit (I don't own one, but someday ...sigh someday) two mannequin arms I snatched the wrong arms so I have three right arms now, a broken fiddle, a metal detector, and a stick of deodorant for my good armpit.
I'm looking for a lady that will take long walks on the bank of the east river and look for floating bodies. I'm trying to find my Dad one of the bodies has to be him. I would also like to huff glue together, break into abandon buildings and look for cats; assemble them together and through them a prom. A girl that would like to build forts out of furniture thats on the street awaiting to be thrown out. I seriously need to build a good one Garry my archenemy keeps attacking mine. Garry is this 9 year old that lives in the house behind me. He is such a jerk! I tell him that too I do and I told him he was a mean head and a his breath smells like toe jam. And it does! I wouldn't lie about stuff like that.
I take all my dates to the kitchen then we watch Conan the Barbarian on Laser disc. Yeah thats right Laser Disc the future is here ladies
Movies: Care Bears: The Giving Festival, Junior, Disney's Prince of Persia: the Sands of Time, The Love Guru, Switching Goals with the Olsen Twins
Shows: Restaurant Impossible, Pawn Stars, Storage Wars, TLC's Cake Boss, Scoobie Doo, Real House Wives of Tacoma, Washington.
Music: Looney tunes theme song on loop
Food: Whatever my mom doesn't make! ha yeah em I right? (motioning for a high five) ...[to no one] ...*Large Sigh*...Quiet weeping
My fleshlight (look it up)
My Xbox & PS3