HardlyVanilla
74 Citrus Heights, United States
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HardlyVanilla
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My self-summary
I like to do things together, like talking, hugs, holding hands, touching, cooking, walking, even cleaning the house. I don’t much like walking alone. I like surprises, that is, creating surprises for someone I care very much about. The surprises, of course, have to be very specific to the interests of that person. I much prefer Christmas presents you’ve made, rather than ones you bought. I’m not much good at multitasking. I am, however, quite good at complexity.
I have a great curiosity about significant people in my life, and am always asking way too many questions. Some people have told me that they are amazed at how much I know about a person, after talking with them for only a little while. They’ve also told me they are shocked at the questions I ask strangers, because they’re so personal. 
I tend to be a creative problem solver and a sappy romantic, which leads to flowers. Sometimes, it can seem to be a contradiction that I love vegetable gardening, rather than growing flowers. I love having a vegetable garden, and going out before the sun’s quite up, to pick weeds and bugs. For most of my life, I’ve much preferred cold to heat. These days, I have a much higher tolerance for heat, perhaps because I’ve lost quite a bit of weight.
Back in the seventies, I was a Street Artist, on the Wharf, in San Francisco, and have had quite an unconventional career (See below.) I spent the last decades of my pre-retirement professional life being a freelance project manager for IT projects.
I like writing. Back in the late nineties, a friend, who was a psychologist, identified me as someone who is able to put feelings into words. That got me started believing I could write. And, it appears, I can. I’ve been doing more and more writing ever since. Maybe, there’s a book in my future.
I do a lot of reading, and used to read science fiction by the yard. Literally. I also read billboards, bumper stickers, sweatshirts, road signs, labels, T-shirts, ingredients, other people’s book titles, and name plates. These days I'm reading a lot that has to do with the nonprofit, psychology books, and The Economist every week, to keep up with what's going on the distant parts of the world. The Scientific American tends to get short shrift, these days. I like carving out some quiet moments, for togetherness, of course, even though my to do list never seems to quite get done. I seem to be much too busy to watch TV, except, of course, with someone I love.
I've done canning in the past, mostly jams, but nothing lately. I like making soup, baking cookies, making fried rice.  I think I don't do much of that lately, because I would like doing them together, with someone special, someone I could hug in the middle of the mess. Guess I'm an over the top romantic.
I have the old version of Joy of Cooking, by the original authors, the one with the make from scratch recipes. That and Laurel’s Kitchen are the only cookbooks I've kept over the years. I suppose next year, I should make some wild blackberry jam, rather than giving them all away, those I don't eat. I have some canning equipment stashed away, somewhere.
I’m very good with my hands, especially giving massages. I have a very sensitive touch. I love to walk through a department store, touching everything, feeling the textures. I love to touch warm, smooth skin. Though, skin that’s too smooth tends to feel a bit sticky.
My favorite color is blue, with an underlying yearning for red. I’ve been told that I’m a fire sign, masquerading as an earth sign. So, my calm demeanor is, apparently, a fraud.  I love dry humor, and don’t like slapstick, like the Three Stooges. I find that people I’m interested in are, without exception, much higher than average in intelligence. And, yes, that means you.
My interest in gymnastics comes from having competed in side horse in high school, and I like watching Olympic gymnastics events on TV. My Mensa level intelligence doesn't seem to have done me all that much good in my life, but it seems to drive a universal curiosity in me. My biggest problem with meditation is remembering to do it regularly. When I do it, it works. Imagine that.
I guess the rest you’ll have to learn by spending time with me. If you've gotten this far, I would guess that we're compatible in the area of reading. :-)
What I’m doing with my life
Trying to figure out retirement. Maybe I should get a job
Currently, I'm executive director for Recover Rebuild Restore, a nonprofit. It has two programs. One helps victims of sex abuse to get into recovery. The other program has developed a workshop to help organizations deal with employees who download pornography in the workplace. Project Manager for the Veteran Appreciation Cards project for Family Shield, a nonprofit.
The first things people usually notice about me
I'm told it's my smile.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Dead Poets Society
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Second order effects. You'd be surprised at how many areas aren't what they seem at first. Ask me about them. Just wait a minute, while I get my soapbox.
On a typical Friday night I am
Probably at home, reading The Economist. I don't really fit in at bars. On the other hand, going out to dinner, a movie, a private party; that's a different story.
You should message me if
You'd like some interesting times.
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