FatFemFeminist
31 Durham, United States
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FatFemFeminist
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My self-summary
I tend to go for radically liberal and progressive, intelligent and compassionate men, women, and people in general who have more than a streak of non conformity. I'll admit to kind of being a sucker for piercings, tattoos (tasteful ones), and manic panic hair, but those aren't hard and fast rules- the only real rules I have are no conservatives/libertarians, no hunters, or bigots (that should go without saying, but you'd be surprised).

I have one tattoo and four total piercings- ears, tragus, septum, and labret with no reason to think I'll stop there. (Update: I had to take my labret out, but I'm hoping to get it redone at a different angle soon)

I want to cuddle on the couch and talk about privilege together.

I'm a feminist, a fat acceptance activist and blogger, and a reformed romantic. I like board games and I make fantastic peanut butter cups. You name a hair color and I've probably done it. I literally wouldn't hurt a fly and I'm pretty political- yeah, one of those dirty socialists you keep hearing about. I tend to say really stupid things which sometimes translates to me being really funny or just really weird with the occasional awkward.

I'm all about intersectionality and being the best ally that I can be which includes acknowledging my privilege and my fuckups when they happen. If you message me then you'd better be willing to acknowledge yours too. When I say ally I mean an ally to all marginalized groups, not just one or two. I'm strictly against sexism, racism, ableism, queerphobia, transphobia, fatphobia, classism, healthism and pretty much anything else you can think of. My veganism is an important part of my being intersectional.

Fatter in person. Also, more fabulous. (seriously.. I'm fat)
What I’m doing with my life
Wondering if I can call myself a poet just because I write poetry. Does it have to be good? (I hope not!) For that matter, am I a writer just because I write occasionally? I did finish NaNoWriMo 2015, but I skipped last year... So, I guess, technically, I wrote a book.

I've been on a fat positive podcast four times, HuffPost Live once, and I spoke at a body positive conference about the intersection of queer and fat issues. I participated in a filming for a body positive series that didn't get picked up, but was still fun to do. I love fat acceptance and fat acceptance activism.

I'm the photographer for The Fat Naked Art Project. I like traveling for it and hope to travel more. I went to NYC in December Atlanta in the Spring of '16. Summer of '17 I'm heading to the Bay area (I hope).

I did local modeling for about five years.. I may get back to it sometime, but I'm taking a break for now.

I did bellydancing for a year and a half and even tried Burlesque which was fun and I wouldn't mind doing it again.

Helping organize meetups. Going to other meetup events. Blogging.

I'm volunteering at my local abortion clinic as a clinic escort. If you're interested in helping please let me know! (Update: I'm temporarily not volunteering, but I still have connections if You want to volunteer!)

Every week I attend a socialist reading group called the jacobin reading group (you can find us on meetup or Facebook) based on the socialist magazine. (update: this group is, at least for now, no longer functioning)

Every Monday, when it's in session, I sing with Flash Chorus.

My first tattoo (8-15-15) is the word "fat" in the Natalie Perkins font. I freaking love it! I'm already planning more.

A spoonie for life.

I want to learn to walk my cats on leashes

I really want to do stupid things, stay up all night trying something I've never tried before, meet new people and live as much as I can while I still can. Do you think you can help me with that?
I’m really good at
I'm fantastic at being opinionated. I can sing. I've been in musical groups since high school. I have a ton of crafty hobbies accumulating in my craft room. I also really love baking and like to think I'm pretty okay at it. I'm no photography expert, but I'm decent.
The first things people usually notice about me
That I'm fat and have bright pink hair? Depends on the person I guess.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books - I love Harry Potter... I was introduced to it around age 13 (I think the 3rd book had just come out) due to working at a used book store with my aunt and getting paid in books. I recommend Lessons From the Fat-O-Sphere to *everyone*. Wicked is so freaking awesome.. I am in LOVE with the musical, but the book is better. Wheel of Time series- I read through 10 when I was younger and would love to re-read from the beginning through the last book.

Currently reading: Straight: the surprisingly short history of heterosexuality. Feminist Theory by Bell Hooks

I've been reading a lot of non-fiction lately, but would love some recommendations for really good fiction novels that I can get lost in.

I'm trying hard to get back to reading more. I used to always have my nose stuck in a book, but lately it's facebook (damn you facebook and all of your activist information and groups)

Movies - I like fantasy, sci-fi, non horror supernatural... Some of my favorite classic movies of all time are Dead Poets Society, Hairspray, and The Last Unicorn. More recent (but likely not too recent because I don't watch movies often) District 9, Seven Pounds, Marvel Universe, all Harry Potter including Fantastic Beasts, and pretty much anything that's a musical (but maybe not Cats...?). I'm living for the day that Wicked is made into a movie.

Music - Forgive Durden, The Beatles and music with a similar sound, Mary Lambert forever and ever (I've seen her live and it was soooo amazing!!), Ingrid Michaelson, Peter Hollins, The Family Crest (another band that's beyond amazing live! I was riding the high from that one for days), Elle King, various artists that grace my playlist.. I do enjoy a lot of pop songs for being upbeat and catchy, but I don't really know what the kids are listening to these days. Feel free to recommend something.

TV: Bones, Supernatural (is this really the last season?! oh god!..er.. not you chuck..), Dr Who (i think the 10th doctor was the bee's knees... season 9 was more difficult to watch and, in general, Capaldi isn't my favorite doctor.. looking forward to season 10's companions though), Torchwood (Miracle Day was hard to watch though), Once Upon A Time, and pretty much anything Sci-fi or supernatural. Classics are, of course, Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel.

Food: I'm a vegan but I barely have the energy to cook. Tofu is one of my favorite foods- tomatoes come in a close second (so.. i'm kind of allergic to tomatoes but i'm finding it really difficult to care) Really I love a little bit of everything and I'm currently searching for the perfect vegan cheesecake recipe. (Edit: I have found the holy grail of vegan cheesecakes and it's amazing).
The six things I could never do without
The number one thing I couldn't do without is my son. Once you become a parent there's nothing you wouldn't do to protect your child. The world becomes a more terrifying place and you suddenly find yourself wondering how you could protect your family in the event of a zombie attack. I'm doing my best to raise an activist in this terrifying world of entitlement (by privileged groups) and, well, privilege.

Number two would be my camera- sometimes I don't take it with me and I completely regret it. How will I remember things without photo evidence?!

Number three would be modern medicine. Seriously though.

Four would be nature, green things, etc I get really down in the winter and pretty up in the spring and fall- i like colorful.

Five would be someone to talk with. And I don't just mean superficial chit chat. I need deep and intellectually stimulating conversations.

and Six would be sleep.. i love sleep!
I spend a lot of time thinking about
How to change the world for the better, helping other people, and improving my mental and physical well being.
On a typical Friday night I am
Depends, sometimes I'm super busy and sometimes my fridays are really chill.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I'm kind of afraid of phones. @_@ Please don't ask me to call you. Email, text, chat, meet in person- all fine.. but no phones.

my hair isn't really long. I love, love, love, hair extensions. (update: I cut all my hair off and can't wear extensions right now.. but wigs? Wigs I can do)

I've officially answered every single okcupid question.
You should message me if
PLEASE don't ask me to come over to your place. Women literally die that way and I don't know you.

You're an awesome intersectional feminist.

You're so liberal that even your liberal college buddies think you've gone too far. (this means progressive liberal not centrist liberal)

You think activism is essential to changing the world.

you're not trying to lose weight. getting healthier is fine and i totally encourage that but i'm not jumping on the body hate train.

No conservatives (including libertarians), no gun nuts, no hunters/fishers, no military (unless you're reformed military and you're not all yay guns and invading marginalized cultures)

I will judge you by whether or not you like cats.
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