FatFemFeminist
31 Durham, United States
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FatFemFeminist
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My self-summary
I tend to go for radically liberal and progressive, intelligent and compassionate men, women, and people in general who have more than a streak of non conformity. I'll admit to kind of being a sucker for piercings, tattoos (tasteful ones- as in ones that aren't sexist, racist, etc), and manic panic hair, but those aren't hard and fast rules- the only real rules I have are no conservatives/libertarians, no hunters, or bigots (even if you swear you aren't because you're a liberal and couldn't possibly)

I have one tattoo and four total piercings- ears, tragus, septum, and labret with no reason to think I'll stop there. (Update: I had to take my labret out, but I'm hoping to get it redone at a different angle soon)

I want to cuddle on the couch and talk about privilege together.

I'm a feminist, a fat acceptance activist and blogger, and a reformed romantic. I like board games and I make fantastic peanut butter cups. You name a hair color and I've probably done it. I literally wouldn't hurt a fly and I'm pretty political- yeah, one of those dirty socialists you keep hearing about. I tend to say really stupid things which sometimes translates to me being really funny or just really weird with the occasional awkward.

I'm all about intersectionality and being the best ally that I can be which includes acknowledging my privilege and my fuckups when they happen. If you message me then you'd better be willing to acknowledge yours too. When I say ally I mean an ally to all marginalized groups, not just one or two. I'm strictly against sexism, racism, ableism, queerphobia, transphobia, fatphobia, classism, healthism and pretty much anything else you can think of. My veganism is an important part of my being intersectional.

Fatter in person. Also, more fabulous. (seriously.. I'm fat)
What I’m doing with my life
Nothing, I'm doing nothing with my life. I'm stuck in a boring rut and trying to figure out what's going on and how to make it stop. What follows are things I used to do. Suggestions? Throw them my way. Please.

I used to write some poetry. Then a poet broke my heart and it fell by the wayside. I did finish NaNoWriMo 2015, but I skipped last year... So, I guess, technically, I wrote a book.

I've been on a fat positive podcast four times, HuffPost Live once, and I spoke at a body positive conference about the intersection of queer and fat issues. I participated in a filming for a body positive series that didn't get picked up, but was still fun to do. I love fat acceptance and fat acceptance activism.

I'm the photographer for The Fat Naked Art Project. I've photographed all around NC, Atlanta GA, and NYC so far.

I did local modeling for about five years.. I may get back to it sometime, but I'm taking a break for now.

I did bellydancing for a year and a half and even tried Burlesque which was fun and I wouldn't mind doing it again, but I'd never look at doing it for anything more. Also looking deeply into white bellydancers and how that fits into cultural appropriation in the history of bellydancing.

I'm volunteering at my local abortion clinic as a clinic escort. If you're interested in helping please let me know! (Update: I'm temporarily not volunteering, but I still have connections if You want to volunteer!)

Every week I attend a socialist reading group called the jacobin reading group (you can find us on meetup or Facebook) based on the socialist magazine. (update: this group is, at least for now, no longer functioning)

Every Monday, when it's in session, I sing with Flash Chorus. Except when I can't be bothered to leave my house and then I'm watching last week's Supernatural and eating Tofurkey Pockets.

My first tattoo (8-15-15) is the word "fat" in the Natalie Perkins font. I freaking love it! I'm already planning more.

A spoonie for life.

I want to learn to walk my cats on leashes, but I'm not sure how much they'd appreciate that.

I really want to do stupid things, stay up all night trying something I've never tried before, meet new people and live as much as I can while I still can and I've only for 3 spoons to offer. Let's make them stretch.
I’m really good at
I'm fantastic at being opinionated, but researching and listening when someone challenges me through their experience and knowledge that I don't have. I can sing a little. I've been in musical groups since high school. I have a ton of crafty hobbies accumulating in my craft room. I also really love baking and like to think I'm pretty okay at it. I'm no photography expert, but I'm decent.
The first things people usually notice about me
That I'm fat and have bright pink hair? Depends on the person I guess.

People from OKC usually notice that my profile is much more intense than I am. In person I'm shy and laid back and will mostly nod and laugh at your jokes.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books - I love Harry Potter... I was introduced to it around age 13 (I think the 3rd book had just come out) due to working at a used book store with my aunt and getting paid in books. I recommend Lessons From the Fat-O-Sphere to *everyone*. Wicked is so freaking awesome.. I am in LOVE with the musical, but the book is better. Wheel of Time series- I read through 10 when I was younger and would love to re-read from the beginning through the last book.

I've been reading a lot of non-fiction lately, but would love some recommendations for really good fiction novels that I can get lost in. I need something to catch my attention because it's been all over the place.

I'm trying hard to get back to reading more. I used to always have my nose stuck in a book, but lately it's facebook (damn you facebook)

Movies - I like fantasy, sci-fi, non horror supernatural... Some of my favorite classic movies of all time are Dead Poets Society, Hairspray, and The Last Unicorn. More recent (but likely not too recent because I don't watch movies often) District 9, Seven Pounds, Marvel Universe, all Harry Potter including Fantastic Beasts, and pretty much anything that's a musical (but maybe not Cats...?). I'm living for the day that Wicked is made into a movie.

Music - Forgive Durden, The Beatles and music with a similar sound, Mary Lambert forever and ever (I've seen her live and it was soooo amazing!!), Ingrid Michaelson, Peter Hollins, The Family Crest (another band that's beyond amazing live! I was riding the high from that one for days), Elle King, various artists that grace my playlist.. I do enjoy a lot of pop songs for being upbeat and catchy, but I don't really know what the kids are listening to these days. Feel free to recommend something. Just discovered Twenty One Pilots and I think that makes me a cool kid... right?

TV: Bones, Supernatural (is this really the last season?! oh god!..er.. not you chuck..), Dr Who (i think the 10th doctor was the bee's knees... season 9 was more difficult to watch and, in general, Capaldi isn't my favorite doctor.. looking forward to season 10's companions though), Torchwood (Miracle Day was hard to watch though), Once Upon A Time, and pretty much anything Sci-fi or supernatural. Classics are, of course, Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel.

Food: I'm a vegan but I barely have the energy to cook. Tofu is one of my favorite foods- tomatoes come in a close second. Really I love a little bit of everything and I'm currently searching for the perfect vegan cheesecake recipe. (Edit: I have found the holy grail of vegan cheesecakes and it's amazing).
The six things I could never do without
The number one thing I couldn't do without is my son. Once you become a parent there's nothing you wouldn't do to protect your child. The world becomes a more terrifying place and you suddenly find yourself wondering how you could protect your family in the event of a zombie attack. I'm doing my best to raise an activist in this terrifying world of entitlement (by privileged groups) and, well, privilege.

Number two would be my camera- sometimes I don't take it with me and I completely regret it. How will I remember things without photo evidence?!

Number three would be modern medicine. Seriously though.

Four would be nature, green things, etc I get really down in the winter and pretty up in the spring and fall- i like colorful.

Five would be someone to talk with. And I don't just mean superficial chit chat. I need deep and intellectually stimulating conversations.

and Six would be affection and to feel cared about.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
How to change the world for the better, helping other people, and improving my mental and physical well being.
On a typical Friday night I am
Depends, sometimes I'm super busy and sometimes my fridays are Supernatural and maybe some Kora.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I don't like to talk on phones unless I know someone really well, but I like texting and otherwise communicating via machine. I'm a bit different in person though.

My hair is shorter than in my pictures. I need to update.

I've officially answered every single okcupid question.
You should message me if
PLEASE don't ask me to come over to your place. Women literally die that way and I don't know you.

You're an awesome intersectional feminist or womanist

You're so off into the radical left that even your liberal college buddies think you've gone too far.

You think activism is essential to changing the world.

you're not trying to lose weight. getting healthier is fine and i totally encourage that but i'm not jumping on the body hate train.

No conservatives (including libertarians), no gun nuts, no hunters/fishers, no military (unless you're reformed military and you're not all yay guns and invading marginalized cultures)

I will judge you by whether or not you like cats.
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