41Okinawa, Japan
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My self-summary
Lets see, where do I start? Maybe a Christmas list in this area? Oh I get it; this is the part where I modestly but yet narcissistically talk about myself. Well, I’ll give it my best shot. I achieved a level of education past high school and mastered my ABC’s; that deserves some credit. From my experience this is an essential quality for a decent conversation, because the afternoon chats with the mannequin in Victoria’s Secret are boring me. Now I know this raises questions as to why the hec am I in Victoria’s Secret;…no comment on that one. Oh and if we ever hang out I can assure you there will be no "awkward silence". I'll be too busy teasing you.

Life's exciting; especially when you realize tomorrow is a chance to try again for the mistake you made today. This helps me cope with embarrassing stunts, like snowboarding down a mountain in nothing but my boxer shorts, all to take on a bet from my friends. Thanks guys. You’re probably wondering at this point if I was dropped on my head as a child. Let me reassure you; I wasn’t, something fell on it. Oh here comes my favorite part. It hasn’t been too noticeable, and I know I need to work a little on it, but a sense of humor might be a good thing around me. I'm just saying, call me crazy, but that’s me…crazy; and what I did in 96 didn’t officially classify me as crazy; I was dismissed of those charges. I also learned to be a patient person from watching paint dry. Yup, I think I’ve mastered that pretty well.

So…I guess this brings me to the end, or not. I might as well stop while I’m still ahead…you’d be just as crazy if you thought I was ahead. Not sure if I accomplished the intended goal here or if I told you what the average girl wants to know. Reading this you either gained little information about me or learned waaayyy too much then you hoped for. Hey, it’s an achievement you made it this far…congratulations! Until then, I’ll be occupied preparing for the zombie apocalypse. Like Mr. Rogers used to say, have a beautiful day in the neighborhood. Any questions?
What I’m doing with my life
Well at the moment I’m aspiring to achieve my long life dream of a world famous Lion tamer. I’m having trouble finding lions in this area; this might take a while. In the meantime I’m counting the days until I become a civilian again, teaching myself Japanese, and figuring out time travel. After that I’ll have all the freedom in the world to fill a backpack up with just enough personal belongings to see more of it.
I’m really good at
Staying within the lines when I color. Hey it’s harder than you think. Health and fitness is very important in my life; it helps when I have to make a quick dash from the police. Oh I like to dance a lot; sometimes with a rose in my mouth and a puffy pirate shirt that exposes my chest hairs. If I can’t find a rose, or a cool shirt I just settle for some salsa dancing.
The first things people usually notice about me
How I’m allowed out in public without a straight jacket. I had to do it last week; it was at the cleaners getting pressed. I can be a little shy at first but warm up quickly if you put me over a flaming hot stove. I guess I’ve been told a few times I don’t look my age. My experiment on reverse aging is working. YES!!!
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
“Where The Wild Things Are”, Duh! Wait..What?!?! You mean its not normal to walk around the house in a onsie with horns and a tail? Alrighty then…woops on admitting that one. To make up for that major testosterone fail my favorite movies are Rambo, Conan, and Gladiator; NAILED IT! I just grew a beard from admitting that. Love scary movies, 80’s music rocks, and I survive off of packets of ketchup and hot sauce from taco bell.
Six things I could never do without
A pair of clean underwear, a snorkel and my mountain bike. HAHA! I bet I just made you visualize one disturbing image in your head. My brain, and maybe a jar to put it in. I should be fine thanks. The rest is pretty simple; wings and beer.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
The meaning of life, how birds fly, concocting evil plans for world domination that never pan out. Really?! Um…I think a lot about what to put in the next section to keep you distracted, yet entertained as I lure you further into the deep abyss of this profile. I do think a lot about life after the military. Maybe move back to Florida, become a professional beach volleyball player and work on my tan all day.
On a typical Friday night I am
Glad I don’t have to work the next day. If I’m feeling lazy I’ll grab a good movie, veg out on the couch, with a nice adult beverage. If I’m feeling active just about anything; dancing, trying a new restaurant, long walks on the beach, champagne with a rose. Wait this is where I’m supposed to put something that would impress a girl, right?
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I'm Batman, (Shhhh). As if I haven’t self-deprecated or embarrassed myself enough. Believe it or not there is a responsible serious side to me; when needed. I’ve always been completely compelled by my emotions to engage in risky behaviour. Sometimes this gets me into trouble, often this gets me into fun. ; )
You should message me if
You need help with your taxes, know a good shrink, want an exciting challenge in your life, you want to be a conspirator to my next big crime. Or if you just want to chat and get to know some random strange guy online you know nothing about. Well I think that pretty much covers it. Masterpiece complete! TTYL. ; )
The two of us