If you’re into biographies, I was born in Charleston, SC but moved to Houston as a li’l baby. I went to school in Boston for 4 years, but I’m back home to take a breather and figure out my next move.
Things that are kind of integral to me, I guess?
I do like to think I’m a perfect gentleman, and will always try to be kind to everyone I encounter. But also, I can be a fucking snark machine. I love teasing, and I’m frequently sarcastic. I don’t mind some friendly backlash, either, and I’m not a tough target at all: I’m a huge science dork who gets too excited about science and nature things, and I have plenty of guilty pleasures on the far side of the masculinity scale.
On paper, this sounds like a pretty bland cop-out, but I really am a pretty easy-going person, easy to get along with (as long as you’re not a complete raging asshole). I’m soft-spoken when I first meet people, but once the ice is broken, or something piques my interest, or I have a drink to numb the awkward, I can get to talking. Piquing my interest isn’t a challenge: science (biology/psychology), nature/animals (especially the poor ugly ones nobody likes), literature/TV/films/pop culture, and sports will all do the trick.
Also humor. I’m punny and goofy and offensive, and I’m almost constantly joking and laughing. …Whether or not I have a “good” sense of humor is a matter of opinion, because I love me some good bad jokes and terrible, shameless puns. If you really make me laugh, I’ll like you for sure.
I can also be serious and curious and inquisitive, don’t worry. I like to ponder and meditate and have deep talks about nearly all matters. I’m all for adventures and adrenaline rushes and mischief and shenanigans. I’m all for lying and lazing in peace, and being quiet and boring with the ones I love.
Like many others, I don’t have some singular goal being on this site. Friend, girlfriend, arch-nemesis, it’s whatever.
But I also have nagging passions for animals, writing, and a little bit for Latin America…so I’m trying to determine the role those will have in my plans. Maybe writing about the behaviors of Latin American species? My ideal jobs, in no particular order, are 1) zookeeper, 2) National Geographic writer, and 3) field/conservation biologist.
Increasingly, I’m considering teaching—middle or high school, biology or writing/literature. I could see myself loving that.
If you’re looking for big money, I see you’ve stopped reading by now.
Anyway, for the moment, I’m taking a breather after 16+ years of relentless formal education. Just being a fucking bum at the moment, but if you’re reading this after October, I’ve probably begun looking for a part-time job and more seriously pondering my passions and future. I’m planning on getting a graduate degree, but I’ve held off applying until I actually have some idea about which field I’d like to invest all my time and money in.
Piano (…well, eventually, hopefully)
Writing (non-fiction…my fiction is garbage)
Stupid jokes ‘n’ puns
Making a creepy Dexter face, apparently
Using words that aren’t technically words but seem like totally reasonable words, so what the hell?
Backing into parking spaces--it must be a pick-up truck-driver thing.
Disguising sarcasm--people don't think my jokes are jokes and it leads to super awkward social situations (which I secretly enjoy).
In reality, I have not been reading nearly as much recently as I’d like, but I plan on using my current “worthless bum” phase to rekindle this affair.
Movies: a few of the ones I can re-watch endlessly: The Motorcycle Diaries, March of the Penguins, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, Zoolander, Bridesmaids, Old School, Pulp Fiction, Dumb & Dumber, My Cousin Vinny, Cool Runnings, The Nightmare Before Christmas…
Since I love laughing, there are few comedies I won’t enjoy at least a little bit. I am a horror FREAK and love the best and worst of them. I also generally like anything Latin American/Spanish, or with Audrey Tautou. Oh, and I would totally protest being forced to watch most musicals, but by the end I would most likely be all into it and immediately require the soundtrack.
Shows: The X-Files, Fringe, Mad Men, Breaking Bad, Dexter, Arrested Development, Modern Family, Parks & Rec, 30 Rock, Game of Thrones, The Wire, The Walking Dead, most Comedy Central and/or HBO (yes, including True Blood, I’M ONLY GODDAMN HUMAN), Battlestar Galactica… Pretty big TV junkie. Oh, and Survivor/Big Brother, completely shamelessly.
Music: [Cliché alert:] I listen to most genres/styles, excluding country. In the past year or so, I’ve begun to appreciate rap/hip-hop much more, and Top 40/dancey stuff doesn’t bother me nearly as much as it used to. I got over the self-righteousness and decided there was a time and a place even for Katy Perry’s bullshit, and it was during goofyfundrunktimes. And also while driving anywhere because radio is the only option in my old-ass truck. I also can get into country/folk (though mostly the folk/swing side of the spectrum—I LOVE Lyle Lovett) during Houston Rodeo season (this was a particularly strong urge when I was a homesick Texan up in Boston).
Food: If I had to pick one thing—ABSOLUTELY Tex-Mex. Cajun and Italian would be on my short-list. All in all, I am rabid about Southern food; Northern food is vastly inferior, and anyone who tells you different is a liar, a cheat, and a scoundrel.
- Music (either listening or playing)
- The sound and feeling of rain
- Real life human company (I couldn’t be a hermit indefinitely)
Or sometimes if nobody's available, I'll just hang out with a drink and/or book and/or movie and/or the internet and/or the family, topped off with a nice, long cry deep into the night.
Also if you don’t mind that I’m short, relatively. [I've heard that 5'8" isn't short, but it's a solid 2" below the US male average, and I know so goddamn many tall people in Houston. Like, all my male friends are 6' and above, what the fuck? Just be aware of this fact, because some women simply can't abide a shorter-than-average man for whatever reasons.]
Especially message me if you want to do fun Houston things. I've been up North for the better part of 4 years, and I feel like I need to re-discover and -explore this city!