"To say that another person can make you happy is to do yourself a great injustice. It's the same as saying someone else has control of your emotions. But anyone who is in touch with their soul knows it isn't true. The feeling of happiness comes from within you, not from somewhere else. It's up to you, and only you, to control how you feel." --Wise Man, from "Wokini"
Things that add joy to my life:
Snuggling, Dancing in the rain at night, SMILES, sharing affection, apple orchards, Laughing, Nature, small hyper dogs playing with large clumsy slobbering ones and cats who could care less, the fresh scent of a foggy morning, warm hues of setting suns that define intricate tree-branch silhouettes, diving straight into a body of water without testing the temperature, SKINNY-DIPPING, Intimacy, the point in a kiss at which you breathe in rhythm, evoking That which sends electric pulses down the length of your spine and to the tips of your fingers, happiness and irony, pillows are great, but tummies are better, deep meditation and reflection, SUNLIGHT!! The reflection of the moon in a puddle, "Monkey Bites", Waking up early to see the sun rise and hear the birds greet the new morning, The "peepers" (frogs) in the evening, my 4-year-old nephew's goofy facial expressions when he eats lemons, GENUINE HUMAN BEINGS who admit and accept their animalistic perversions, TAKING ACTION, the human body and its infinite beauty, LOVE, and Cheerios.
Thoughts on Love and Relationships:
I am of the belief that it is simply not enough to say "I love you" in an attempt to express intimacy. Action is the fuel for desire and affection. Words fall on deaf ears if action does not echo them. Little things such as doing the dishes, massaging shoulders and feet after a rough day, listening and empathizing, leaving silly notes in odd places to be pleasantly discovered are daily actions that reinforce affection. Even household chores are daily opportunities to actively express, "I cared enough to do this, so that you didn't have to." Love is built on a foundation of little acts of dailiness.
Love, of course, starts within each individual. In order for me to love and respect a potential companion, she must first love and respect herself in both principle and practice. I do not seek to "complete" someone who is otherwise incomplete; rather, I seek to compliment someone who will mutually compliment me. It is important that our bond is one of positive reinforcement in which we encourage one another to achieve our individual goals as well as shared.
"If it don't feel right, bring it into sight!" Good communication is extremely vital to honest expression of love. My partner must be willing to openly express her thoughts and feelings. I am not willing to play the guessing game anymore. Happy and healthy relationships exist as the result of open dialogue; the blunter, the better.
The most important characteristic I look for in a woman, or anyone for that matter, is selflessness. I am a giver for the sake of giving; it gives me great joy to know that I have a positive influence on people. I desire a companion who possesses this same quality. I have been in too many selfish relationships that have ended with me feeling used. So, it would be nice to be with someone who gives back a little bit.
Importance of political views and education
It is also very important that our values are in agreement. I am very politically well-informed, progressive and active, and I require that my companion at least share my views on a basic level. Of course, there is always room for discussion and debate. I am not a stubborn person and am more than willing to consider alternate viewpoints as long as they are informed (credible sources). My views are based on a strong foundation of human rights and true equality. Above all, I treasure education and integrity; with greater knowledge comes an obligation to act accordingly. I am forever a student of the world, constantly seeking knowledge in all that I experience. My companion must possess this same passion for life.
Note: If you consider Fox News a credible "news" organization, don't waste your time contacting me.
Sex in an long-term relationship:
It is important that my companion, at the very least, enjoy sex. I understand that it is sometimes difficult. As an occasional participant in a group called Actions Against Rape (AAR) at school, I am well-aware of the impact past traumatic sexual experiences can have on one's psyche. As aforementioned, my companion must first love herself before she can love me. I am not a psychiatrist, and consequently, I would prefer not to engage in a relationship in which I must act as one.
Regarding the act itself, I am an incredibly passionate lover. The physical manifestation of love is one of the most beautiful expressions of affection in relationships. Nothing quite compares to the intimacy shared in that moment, when two separate bodies embrace and become one. Few things give me as much joy as pleasing my partner; I absolutely love it. And as one who once considered pursuing a career in sex therapy, I will state that I am also quite knowledgeable (interpret as you will). I am also very open-minded and fairly adventurous.
I am fun and quirky, inspired, and energetic!
One of my favorite quotes comes from a wonderful potter named Nancy Utterbuck. She says:
"I had started out wanting to make a profound statement in my work. But I came to understand that my life is full and rich with single moments of dailiness, not with awesome moments of enlightenment."
My goal in life is to enjoy those simple little pleasures we often overlook as we go about our busy lives. Ambition is important, and it is always beneficial to meet challenges. But I've learned that reasonable expectations are important. Life is a process, and personal growth never happens "overnight". Little daily goals go a long way and become instinctive in time.
Fine arts: drawing, painting, ceramics
music: music composition, trumpet, guitar, vocal(tenor)
theater and film: acting, stage direction, directing, editing
language and linguistics: English, Japanese, Spanish, French
martial arts: Tae Kwon Do, Wing Chun, Muay Thai
writing: poetry, short stories
sports: baseball, basketball, dance
Music is my greatest passion. I Love everything from classical to industrial and Reggaetón to punk. Lately, I've been listening to a lot of Regina Spektor and a German group named Die Ärzte. Eternal favorites include Beethoven, Dvořák, Palestrina, Verdi, Bach, Brahms, The Beatles, Simon and Garfunkle, Carlos Vives, Juanes, Yann Tiersan, RBD, Annie Major-Matte, Jeff Buckley, John Williams, and George Gershwin among others.
Movies depend on the mood. I am very easy to please. I absolutely LOVE the beautiful cinematography, crisp editing, and inspiring soundtracks exhibited in Amelie and American Beauty and can appreciate the long takes, painterly mise-en-scene, and progressive politics of Kenji Mizoguchi. But of course, mindless action movies and ridiculous comedies are just as important. Nothing is more fun than belting Bohemian Rhapsody with friends while watching Wayne's World. I also love everything Mel Brooks has ever made, especially Robin Hood: Men in Tights and History of the World, Part I.
Food? Nothing beats fruits and veggies straight from the orchard and garden. But after living in Japan, I'll eat just about anything as long as it won't make me sick. I like healthy foods (preferably local) that make me feel good.
2. Family and Friends: Your relationships define who you are.
3. Nature: beautiful, constant and absolutely free to enjoy.
4. Creative and Honest Expression: Allow feeling to drive you.
5. Human Touch: hugs and snuggling are essentials in life.
6. Health: take care of that incredible machine of flesh and bone.
7. Cheerios: They're just good...especially with honey.
When I see the stars at night, I think of the vast universe in which we live and how significant or insignificant we may be to the big picture; but, I also just observe and think, "Holy leaping monkeys! The sky is so clear and beautiful, and the stars are so bright tonight!"
Not everything has to be serious and profound. In fact, it's refreshing to be able to quiet your mind and just enjoy the atmosphere without analyzing it.