JoltLogan
34Chicago, United States
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JoltLogan
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My self-summary
My self-summary? I'm an endlessly loyal, honest-to-a-fault kind of guy whose whole purpose in life is to make people laugh and paraphrase Roger Rabbit. I've been a Cubs fan since conception and I cried tears of joy when they made it to the World Series and felt a euphoric sense of relief when they won it all. The Grammarly Chrome extension saves me from making typos of which I make lots of because I type really fast. That's not a humblebrag, that'd be a really pathetic humblebrag. It's just that I learned how to design websites when I was 13 and it has basically been my livelihood so I've spent the last 20 years basically sitting in front of a computer and I hope I never have to make another website for a client ever again because FFS they can all go fly a kite, Gretchen.

Now that I'm in Chicago it's starting to open up the creative floodgates that used to run wild when I was in college. The floodgates that were locked up because being an adult isn't all it's cracked up to be, but at least I can rent a car, right? That's a cool perk.

Oh yeah, I'm a filmmaker. Howdy!
What I’m doing with my life
Currently attending The Harold Ramis Film School at The Second City where they are teaching me how to finally be funny. The program is VERY intensive. It's basically like having a part time job, but one of those part time jobs where your employer is trying to milk as many hours out of you as possible without paying you a full time wage, so it's like "Hey you're part time, so you're gonna be working 35-39 hours a week which won't give you time to do anything else professionally outside of work unless you want to crush your own spirit by working 60-80 hours a week and not sleeping"

But seriously, it's a ton of work and takes up a lot of my time, but when I'm not doing that I'm attempting to exercise by the sheer virtue of exploring this city. Currently got a sweet path carved out that takes me through Andersonville and onto the lakefront. It's scenic and serene and peaceful and I love it. I also like those raccoons in Lincoln Park that come out to eat croutons that an old man feeds once in a while. They're pretty chill.

Other than that I've been spending a lot of time writing fake missed connections on Craigslist to keep my creative writing sharp. "I saw you in the bread aisle, but the only buns I wanted weren't on a shelf" is mine if you ever come across it.
I’m really good at
Making decadent peanut butter & jelly sandwiches, spending money on interesting and/or useless things, fawning over filmmaking equipment, ignoring my dentist, throwing away the yellow pages, driving a car safely like a God damn champion, and saying the words/phrases "apparently", "here's the thing", "but, uh, yeah, so...", and many many more.

Haha, ahhhhh I'm just kidding, I don't have a dentist.
The first things people usually notice about me
My voice is as deep as the ocean is... deep, I guess. Because I have zero singing talent, but great deep voice talent, if/when I ever sing karaoke (basically when I'm hammered ass drunk) my go-to song is "Mmmmmmmmm" by the Crash Test Dummies. I haven't tried it, but I could probably do a mean "The Distance" by Cake, too. I was called Barry White in high school by two girls who insisted on having me say "Hey baby" over and over again much to their delight. They would walk past me in the hallway, ask me to say it, I would, then they laughed and left. I have forgotten their names.

Speaking of, I forget names easily. I should probably put that in the "Things I'm good at" section, but you might notice it quickly in a social setting. I will literally forget someone's name 10 seconds after being told their name about 90% of the time. Unless it's a unique name like Chrysannalisa or someone who actually goes by Zachariah instead of Zach like a weirdo.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: I'm not well read. I grew up in the digital age and as such I'm more of a TV/Movies kind of a guy. That said, I thoroughly enjoyed the following books/series: Ready Player One, The Chaos Walking Series, World War Z, American Psycho, Watership Down, basically a bunch of books that spawned movies, for better or worse.

I'm also ionto comic books, though I have not read them in a couple years, but that's moreso because of time not allowing me the luxury. I know Comic books may seem nerdy but whatever, I like them. To me they're like storyboards for films, so as a filmmaker they are much more entertaining to me. I don't read the superhero stuff though, don't care for it. I'm more a fan of these unique stories: Saga, Chew, Sex Criminals, Nowhere Men, Locke & Key, Petrograd, Fatale, Fell, Transmetropolitan, Rat Queens, East of West, and many MANY more!

Movies. Easy, I'll give you my Top 10:

1) L.A. Confidential
2) Who Framed Roger Rabbit?
3) Amelie
4) Dawn of the Dead (original)
5) Wristcutters: A Love Story
6) Spaceballs
7) Shaun of the Dead
8) Clue
9) Defending Your Life
10) The Fall

TV: I hardly have enough time to watch all these amazing hour long shows anymore, but here's what I like:

Current - Last Man on Earth, Brooklyn Nine-Nine, New Girl, The Good Place, Jon Glaser Loves Gear, Adam Ruins Everything, Those Who Can't, Game of Thrones, Last Week Tonight, The Man in the High Castle, The Grand Tour, Stranger Things, Sherlock, Archer, Halt & Catch Fire, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, Mr. Robot.

Past - 30 Rock, Parks & Rec, Arrested Development, Dinner for Five, Firefly, Community, Futurama, Happy Endings, Human Giant, Hustle, Mob City, Seinfeld, Cheers, Fraiser, Friends, Night Court, Wings, and I'm sure a billion other things I'm forgetting

Music: It varies depending on my mood. I used to be a big metalhead back in high school so I still have an affinity for hard rock and punk, but my musical tastes definitely shifted as I got older. Here's a smattering of bands from my favorite songs playlist on Spotify, for clarity:

Modern Baseball, Andrew Jackson Jihad, Trent Reznor/NIN, Metric, Run The Jewels, Motion City Soundtrack, PUP, The Dirty Nil, The Avett Brothers, The Pixies, Tracy Bonham, Dan Mangan, Those Dancing Days, Cheap Girls, The Airborne Toxic Event, Grimes, Foxy Shazam, Iron Maiden, Zolof The Rock & Roll Destroyer, Kanye West, Sufjan Stevens, Grandaddy, CHVRCHES, The Blood Brothers, Alabama Shakes, Hurray for the Riff Raff, Refused, Paul Simon, Jimmy Eat World, They Might Be Giants, Surfer Blood, Say Anything, Talking Heads, Neutral Milk Hotel, Purity Ring, Japandroids, Death From Above 1979, Muse, Beirut, The Joy Formidable, Dark Dark Dark, Phantogram, The Cat Empire, Youth Lagoon, Pearl & The Beard, and many MANY more.

Food: I'm down for whatever, and I feel like I'm cheating myself if I eat at the same restaurant twice in this city. Why eat somewhere you've already been when there are over a thousand other options that are probably really good, too? But if I'm giving my greatest hits of Chicago eateries I've patronized multiple times so far: Little Bad Wolf, Kumas, Goddess & Grocer, Sedgwick Stop, Eleven City Diner, Pho 888, Tweet, Hopleaf.
Six things I could never do without
1) My unwavering hatred for making lists
2) Just kidding, I love lists
3) What am I supposed to be doing again?
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation... it's all fair game.

Sorry, OKCupid told me to write that. Stop being creepy, OKCupid.
On a typical Friday night I am
I wish it were something cooler than "Hanging out with my friends and having drinks" or "Chilling at home and watching Netfix". We all do that, and that's rad. I just wish I could genuinely say something like "I spend my weekends trying to solve unsolved crimes from the 80's on the off chance I get to meet Robert Stack" but it's not true. That and Robert Stack is dead so that dream will never come true. R.I.P.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
Whenever I'm having a shitty day I watch videos of baby elephants doing the darndest things and it picks me right back up.

Also, on a real note, I'm a bit of an introvert/shy guy so I have a pretty hard time starting a conversation or throwing myself into a voluntary situation even if I'm interested in doing it, but as soon as I'm thrown into the deep end I'm perfectly capable of treading water and keeping the conversation or activity going. Example: At my school we had a socializing activity on orientation day and I pretty much sat at a table and didn't go up to anyone to talk even though I wanted to, but as soon as someone came up to me, we had a perfectly normal conversation. I guess I'm just shit at ice breakers is what I should say.
You should message me if
You like to laugh, you like to have insightful conversations, you're into artistic culture, you didn't vote for Donald Drumpf, you really like decadent peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, you think I'm just a swell and entertaining gentlemen.

Bonus points if you understood the Gretchen reference.
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