36Brooklyn, United States
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My self-summary
~let's make a memory~

Je habite à Brooklyn, mais je passe beaucoup de temps à Paris

i enjoy texting/typing like a 16yr old girl with people who think they are 2 intelligent 4 that sort of thing. u can probably read my entire personality through this anecdote.

i enjoy laughing when people tell me that they don't go on vacations but instead consider themselves "travelers."

my life's work would have been complete had I been arrested for somehow ruining the Marina Abramović installation.
What I’m doing with my life
Former college professor in History and Philosophy who became a writer for hire. I write all sorts of stuff: commercials, journalism, intros for art books, some of your favorite websites, print ads...literally all of it.

It's pretty weird and I literally do corporate and communist at once. For example, in June 2017 I wrote a campaign for a hot sauce company AND articles in a socialist magazine.


My inspirations for teaching were:

Bill Murray in Ghostbusters
Sam Kinison in Back to School
Donald Sutherland in Animal House
I’m really good at
figuring out how to get free coffee within the first month of living anywhere. To not be able to do this would mean to be a total failure at life. Luckily, it has not happened yet.
The first things people usually notice about me
vintage SS regalia, my trusty didgeridoo, my facial tattoos
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Joyce 2 Nora


I read G.K. Chesterton's "The Man Who Was Thursday" recently and found this quote apropos of life amongst the fixed gear bikram yogis of Williamsburg:


Gabriel Syme was not merely a detective who pretended to
be a poet; he was really a poet who had become a detective.
Nor was his hatred of anarchy hypocritical. He was one of
those who are driven early in life into too conservative an
attitude by the bewildering folly of most revolutionists. He
had not attained it by any tame tradition. His respectability
was spontaneous and sudden, a rebellion against rebellion.
He came of a family of cranks, in which all the oldest people
had all the newest notions. One of his uncles always walked
about without a hat, and another had made an unsuccessful
attempt to walk about with a hat and nothing else. His father
cultivated art and self-realisation; his mother went in
for simplicity and hygiene. Hence the child, during his tenderer
years, was wholly unacquainted with any drink between
the extremes of absinth and cocoa, of both of which
he had a healthy dislike. The more his mother preached a
more than Puritan abstinence the more did his father expand
into a more than pagan latitude; and by the time the
former had come to enforcing vegetarianism, the latter had
pretty well reached the point of defending cannibalism.
Being surrounded with every conceivable kind of revolt
from infancy, Gabriel had to revolt into something, so he
revolted into the only thing left — sanity."

Hannah Arendt - Everything
Distinction - Pierre Bourdieu
Burn Collector - Al Burian
The Man Without Qualities - Robert Musil
Ellen Willis - Essays
Shulamith Firestone - The Dialectic of Sex
The Magic Mountain - Thomas Mann
The Decline and Fall Of the Roman Empire - Edward Gibbon
The Handmaid's Tale - Margaret Atwood
Capital - Karl Marx
Minima Moralia - Theodor Adorno
SOS - Guy Debord
Kaputt - Curzio Malaparte


The Fall
The Wipers
The Minutemen
Archers of Loaf
The Country Teasers
The Yummy Fur
The Raincoats


John Fahey
The Byrds
The Flamin' Groovies

various compilations of world psych and garage

lots of french pop


Costa-Garvas' Z is on instant netflix. why leave the house?

Barry Lyndon - Stanley Kubrick
Scenes from a Marriage - Ingmar Bergman
Aguirre, The Wrath of God - Werner Herzog
Week End - Jean-Luc Godard

im not a snooty film person, i also really like stupid comedies and post-apocalyptic horror flicks. Caddyshack might have more merit than the entirety of the french new wave.


I think its insulting that i should have to write what kind of food i like. What a garbage question. I LIKE BREAD. [FUCK, that shit is really bad for you huh? cut out carbs. human life is misery. ]
Six things I could never do without
brown rice
downloading music illegally
curl enhancing hair products
clean socks
the printed word
I spend a lot of time thinking about
why there is an option to share your okcupid profile on twitter/facebook

whether actual bi-sexual women are enraged or excited about all of the "bi-sexual" women on ockupid.

what the lyrics to The Ramones' "Commando" actually mean.

how funny it is that the french expression for topless,"en monokini," is based on a false etymological reading of bi-kini.

19th century property law, the reorganization of social space in post civil war america, and the effects of the same on subject formation in rural landscapes. Nowadays most of my thinking time is devoted to reading/writing histories of modern american conservatism and anti-state leftism in the 60s. I'm kind of a masochistic left-elitist and love reading about the tea party and conservative populism. However, my true passion lies elsewhere in making fun of liberal substitutes for politics proper.

women, beer, etc

how to escape the logic of the following dilemma without following Kierkegaard's advice and becoming a good Lutheran:

"Since boredom advances and boredom is the root of all evil, no wonder, then, that the world goes backwards, that evil spreads. This can be traced back to the very beginning of the world. The gods were bored; therefore they created human beings. Adam was bored because he was alone; therefore Eve was created. Since that moment, boredom ...entered the world and grew in quantity in exact proportion to the growth of population. Adam was bored alone; then Adam and Eve were bored en famille. After that, the population of the world increased and the nations were bored en masse. To amuse themselves, they hit upon the notion of building a tower so high that it would reach the sky. This notion is just as boring as the tower was high and is a terrible demonstration of how boredom had gained the upper hand. Then they were dispersed around the world, just as people now travel abroad, but they continued to be bored. "
On a typical Friday night I am
playing a show or at a bar
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
i have only been in three fights in my entire life and they were all over someone cutting me in a bathroom line. Lines are the building blocks of democracy and i take them very seriously.

I sometimes make people like me solely to deprive them of the satisfaction of disliking me

I know which bodegas will sell you beer and cigarettes on an EBT/SNAP card

i am a bad spelar and my handwriting leaves a lot to be desired. but hey, people who do not agree that content > form are usually dumb.

I have never dated a girl from jersey with spray on tan, though I would if given the opportunity.

SOMETIMES, if a girl is really special, i will wear fancy underwear for her.
You should message me if
you are willing to agree that the road to heaven is paved with low expectations

you want to get accidental; in the sense of "Before beauty disappears entirely from the earth, it will go on existing for a while by accident"
The two of us