43Ithaca, United States
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My self-summary
This aberrant cephalopod is INTJ by by nature, ENTP by necessity, and LS/MFT by choice. IMPORTANT NOTE: I AM NOT NOW, NOR HAVE I EVER BEEN, A GORGONOPSIAN!

Awww nuts; I really don't know how to write this. How about I shave a few slices from the mediocre side of my personality, shuffle the deck, and then deal them out here?

01) Nothing exists save mathematics and the void (System.Void to be precise).

02) I think Lo Pan should write this for me.

03) I hate SUVs.

04) I love Vespa motorcycles.

05) The best automobiles have eight cylanders, four doors, and rear-wheel drive. Think late-70's Buick. Think Ancient Le Sabre de Buick (+4 vs Elves).

06) hockey is the *only* sport in the whole universe.

07) I love to play golf. ``Golf'' is defined as ``wearing silly pants while drinking whiskey indoors''.

08) Cosmogolf (taught to me by my friends Slippy and Astrobabe from planet Las Valium) is the ultimate expression of golf.

09) I can roll my tongue.

10) I have attached earlobes.

11) I am a non-conformist.

12) I hate chaos and will impose order.

13) I like uniformity.

14) I am truthful especially when i am contradictory.

15) There is no 15.

0x10) Integer multiples of 8 rock!

Legu mia profilo angla.

Legu mia profilo angla.

Legu mia profilo angla.

Legu mia profilo angla.

Legu mia profilo angla.

I am brutally considerate, industrious, and didactically twisted
What I’m doing with my life
ARRRRR! A pirate I be! Har har har! *chuckle*

I'm studying world domination, and practicing one luser at a time.

I'm a programmer and mathematician at heart. I'm also a skilled network engineer, system engineer, and system administrator.

I'm currently living in MDT.PA.US (by way of ANC.AK.US) until I can find my way back to STL.MO.US. I lived in ATL.GA.US, YYC.ON.CA, SAN.CA.US, and a million other places. I was born in rural.PA.US and don't plan on going back any time soon.

I'm also looking for a gaming group for some D&D or SFB. I'll take almost anything as long as the house is smoke friendly since I'm LS/MFT to the bone.

I watch a lot of documentaries on SCICH, THC, MILI, TLC, DTMS, and NGEO. I also watch The Ren & Stimpy Show on NTOON when I can. I am an avid fan of PBS's NOVA. I watch some Adult Swim on TOON. I agree that Full Metal Alchemist is better than Jew Blender, errrr, Blue Gender... but I would rather watch dogs fucking than watch Blue Gender, FMA, Big O, Tri-Gun, or Family Guy. I hate Family Guy. I like Futurama.

So I guess I'm wasting my life in front of a pico console filled with C# while the television spews an endless mess of crap. Perhaps that's why I'm an ordained subgenius minister.

This USAF veteran of combat communications, digital satellite communications, ground-mobile forces is like all SatCom Rangers: we do it 'til our gigahertz! (us ground-mobile forces type alsos bang all ten gears).
I’m really good at
I've been told I'm really good at disecting the living brain via conversation and then, once I've grown bored with my subject, adding a dash of salt and discarding it over my shoulder to be forgotten. Neural tissue is 98% cholesterol, so it fries up very nice with foie gras (there's nothing like a cool fo'ty of foie gras).

I am considered an ``expert'' in relational mathematics by some people, a ``master'' at computer programming by others, and damn good systems administrator and network engineer by still others. The intersection of the above sets is not null.

I am also considered a good teacher. I even taught at university.

It would seem I am also good at the art of innuendo, but sometimes when I say something it only has two meanings.

I excel at paralell parking.

I have been complimented on my skill at many strategy wargames.

I dig operations research and logistics, but my fort� is indeed strategy (abstract thought).

I *LOVE* to cook (now serving armageddon with a side of fries).

Spotting the difference between Shub-Niggurath and Cthulhu, and why the Shub-Internet and Shub-Rnd coalition will destroy the world for all MUDs eventually, leaving kremvax to host pong.
The first things people usually notice about me
The first thing people notice is I brought a laptop computer to a blue-collar bar... or possibly my middle finger.

Maybe they notice that since I'm fairly sagacious I pretty much grok anything new with both panache and aplomb... or they noticed I use ellipses and parentheses even in speech.
Six things I could never do without
I spend a lot of time thinking about
I spend considerable amounts of time wishing I could wield common sense as a farmer wields a 2x4 (*WHAM!* right in the back of the head).

I speculate about how many different ways I could kill a service technician during the night-shift, and how many more Dell/Gateway/IBM/Unisys/DEC/Alpha would send to my NOC before catching wise.

I am constantly thinking about relational mathematics and simulating non-linear and stochastic systems. I study a lot of these things for applications in Combinatorial Game Theory.

I've made some very interesting simulation of star-system formation (hard-core astrophysics, baby), starting with the gas cloud and moving through the accretion disc and into the resultant system (which may or may not posess planets depending on the ``lumps'' caused by a multitude of factors).

I've recently extended that work for economics modeling of sorts to use in a MUD (I despise the non-pronouncable and pretentious term ``MMORPG''). Naturally the Keynesian approach served as a ``rough draft'', but all code to date is based on a system of differential equations. I eventually hope to incorporate a politics engine based on my own theories.
Operations research and logistics play a big part in the simulation so far, so eventually I'll have written a very strange MUD indeed.

Some of my most recent research into behavioural modelling has lead me down Mancur Olson's theories, specifically regarding the small and latent pools. A great deal of my own thoughts, while dominated by exclusive noncollective goods, lacked a great deal until I incorporated his insights into inclusive collective goods and their impacts on group dynamics.

I often think about how to make things more efficient.

I enjoy strategy and tactical wargames and wargaming in general. I love operational and theater scope, but I do enjoy battlefield scope as well (I'm INTJ; I delegate the battlefield to my underlings once they've been given detailed, step-by-step instructions which even incompetents such as they could not screw up). I particularly love SFB. I feel competent with all races, but I am at my best either playing Orion or Klingon. I am piqued by strike-warfare (PFT/CVA/SCS operations) as well as surface-warfare, but cloak-hunting (subsurface-warfare) makes me antsy. I have yet to participate in planetary assaults (amphibious warfare) beyond simple raids (hostage rescue, hostage taking, sabotage, and simple harassment).
I have also played Warhammer and Warhammer:40K. I really like playing genestealers in 40K, but I'm a softie for Skaven in Fantasy.
I've played Sittuyin and I like it.
I like the early BattleTech, and despise the current rules. There is no challenge if one is armed with an Rotary AC50-LBX with AP rounds.

I like *anything* that would be considered an abomination. I also dig that which man was never meant to know.

Thanks to sennybaby I think about linguistics in general, and modern english and esperanto specifically. English's positional-based syntax
is amazing in action.

I also spend a lot of time thinking about sex and porn. By ``a lot'' I mean a great deal. By ``a great deal'' I mean almost continuously.

I have also discovered the Unified Field Theory of Quantum-Bogo Dynamics.
On a typical Friday night I am
Camping with someone really, really wonderful.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I often reserve room 404 if I must stay at a hotel.

I once taught CS404.

I know The Riddle of Steel.

You have died of dystentery.

I am atonal, but not disharmonic.

I am symetrical, but only on one axis of evil.

If you xyzzy, then nothing happens; yet if I xyzzy then twice as much nothing happens. Niether one of us knows what will happen if either of us plugh. Nasty, eh? Fortunately this shadowy figure is not YARH.

Sometimes I have a need for (dare I say the word?) religion, and then I go out and program encryption algorithms.

I like girls. My only sin is lust! I get grouchy when I'm hungry; I like a big meal.

I like big tits. Big tits rock! Real women have curves.

It would seem I also don't know when to shut the hell up.

When I'm bored I like to netsex my own echo port. Ewww...
You should message me if
Let's enjoy a rousing game of Chose Your Own Adventure!

#1 If you are too stupid to know what this means, you die. Otherwise turn to page #16

#16 If you have ovaries then turn to page #75, otherwise you die.

#75 If you know the difference between ``available'' and ``single'', then turn to page #2, otherwise you die.

#2 If your OkCupid profile advertises you as ``single'' then turn to page #124, otherwise you die.

#124 If your OkCupid profile advertises you as ``single'' but you actually have a boyfriend or husband, then you die. Otherwise turn to page #89

#89 If would rather be ``polyamorous'' than ``polygamous'', then you die. Otherwise turn to page #23

#23 If your IQ score has three digits and the most signifigant digit is NOT zero, then turn to page #37, otherwise you die.

#37 If you expect only the very best from those around you then turn to page #44, otherwise you die.

#44 If you could love someone who would unconditionally love you (beyond these simple conditions I mean), then turn to page #69. Otherwise you die.

#69 If you think sex is a dish best served often, then turn to page #12. Otherwise you die.

#12 If you can look at lesbian porn and critique it as you would a major film, then turn to page #61. Otherwise you die.

#61 You did it! You managed to save the third planet of Altair 404, program the Timex Sinclair (that's Sir Sinclair to you) in all 16KB of her glory (this model lacks the high moby), defuse the bomb in Paris, save the president, and still managed to rox0r mah sox0rz.

Tee-hee... I said x0r.
The two of us