39Cincinnati, United States
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My self-summary
Attention: for a more modern and slightly less verbose profile be sure to visit me at Enochalypse_Now

I'm keeping this one here because some people seem to prefer it over the other/personal archival purposes.

We now return to our regularly scheduled broadcast...

Don't gimme that look, that's right, let's get sweaty, let's get real sweaty, I'm talkin' rainforest sweaty, I'm talkin' swamp sweaty.

Let's fill the bathtub full of sweat… alright.

Why is it that only 1 in 10 people who view my profile bother to leave me a message? To make matters worse, most of them are people whom I've already viewed and messaged.
Of which, only half bother replying, leading me to believe that this site might better suit the moniker OkBitches.
(if you're the kind of so called feminist who was offended by that, it's better we find out now isn't it? there's the door...)

Seriously though, believe it or not, your pussy is NOT made of gold. Get over yourselves!

How about this, if you don't find me utterly repulsive, wink.

If you strongly disagree with something I've written here or it has caused you to believe that we won't get along/be compatible, why not ask about it and find out if this is really the case?

To whom it may concern, when I say looking for:

New friends, Activity partners, Long-distance penpals

I mean it... I know from experience that I am capable of being just friends with girls. Some of my best friends, including my best friend ever, have been girls. So seriously, if you think you can deal with just being my friend and not preoccupy yourself with wanting "benefits" send me a message!

A great thing about being 31 is I no longer think with my d!ck.

(BTW, if you're a gay guy or even a lesbian and we share common interests, don't be afraid to say hello, seriously. oh oh and if you're a transvestite, transgendered, etc. definitely drop me a line!)

Furthermore, when I say looking for:

short/long term dating

I usually only date 1 person at a time because I am so not one of those little black book toting no selfesteem guys. (hence I'm not here looking for casual sex partners, especially not of the "poly-amorous" variety, yuck!)

I don't usually "short term" date anyone unless something happens that makes it blatantly obvious that it's not going to work out. E.g. most recent journal post.

Naturally if all is going well, the short term becomes the long term and yadda yadda yadda. If for some reason this doesn't happen, I hope that we can still be friends.

we now return to our regularly scheduled program...

I'm Buddhist. I consume punk rock and cheap beer at CBGB

Actually when i DID go to CBGB's it was just some shitty metal band but at least I've got that bootleg Flipper album.

I'm a hermit but not entirely by choice. It may be due to having a mild case of Asperger's Syndrome (see journal if additional information is required) but I can't be entirely sure if it's that or just my world views being out of sync with most other people. These views can be most closely compared to precepts found in the following religions and or philosophy(ies): Daoism or Taoism, Zen Buddhism, Gnoticism, Quietism, Stoicism, Absurdism, Idealism and Situationism. I am somewhat interested in the works of Ludwig Wittgenstein and Rudolf Steiner. (no I didn't attend a Waldorf school but I kinda wish I had)

I was baptized Irish Roman Catholic as a kid, started practicing my own brand of Santeria, Voodoo and Chaos Magic as a teen, followed by a short stint as a Christian Hippie in college (when I was also Goth and reading The Tibetan Book of the Dead) which coincided with my budding interest in Hinduism. From Krishna to Kali to Shiva then Ganesh, eventually abandoning deity worship (had a Kali shrine) in favor of a formless/nameless G_d aka the Tao. Yet I still find myself drawn to Hanuman, perhaps a partial inspiration to my mutton chops aside from the more obvious Wolverine.

I believe such a background is good grounds to label myself an eclectic paradigm pirate. Yarrrgh!

Unfortunately, I don't have a ship, however I did just get a box a.k.a. Scion xB. They get great gas milleage and this makes me happy because I am a bit of an Environmentalist. Not quite to the extent of affiliating myself with the Green Party; for what it's worth I am Libertarian Socialist (it's not a complete contradiction but if you think it is you can leave now) who is so opposed the the pollution created by an uncaring society ran by Republican Capitalist Sith Lords. Part of me believes that it has something to do with the "new world order" conspiracy i.e. Illuminati, Free Masons the Bilderberg Group, Zionists etc.

I am very interested but not obsessed with the work of David Icke. Had I found his books back in the days where I tripped on LSD I may have ended up a lot more paranoid lol. Especially considering I was still pretty into Ufology and intrigued by stuff like The Sirius Mystery by Robert Temple and The Urantia Book around that time.

For what it's worth, I'm a Serpentarius Fire Snake.

I am chaotically, evil, and will destroy you!.
What I’m doing with my life
I am a certified Personal Trainer who is currently working towards becoming a Registered Yoga Teacher. I try to eat healthy and am moving back towards a vegetarian diet.

Currently beginning training to be on Ninja Warrior 2010...
Consisting of Rock Climbing walls, Shaolin Kung Fu, Parkour and Freestyle Running. All of this, in addition to my current Weight Training and Cycling or Spinning regiment.

Looking forward to teaching Group Power classes which I have been attending. Group Power is basically cardio weightlifting (endurance training) 1 hour non-stop.

I'm also musician who has been making home recordings since High School. My only formal training is on saxophone and I tend to be more interested in the recording aspect of music, I kinda consider myself more of a songwriter, composer, producer and engineer than an actual musician. I have a multitude of little electronic goodies that I use to create music which falls into categories such as Ambient, Dub, Gothic, Jazz, Live Electronics and Trip Hop. I plan on creating an album for use in my future Yoga classes, with the hope of selling CDs to students as well as other Yoga instructors.

Oh and for those wondering what I may have been studying at that 2 year college I dropped out of:

I’m really good at
Reading, writing and conversation. Cooking and cleaning. Giving massages ... bom chicka wah wah...

Being "more spiritual" than nearly all similar users.
The first things people usually notice about me
Socially: funny, weird, perverted, intelligent.

Physically: I'm not completely white! (half Asian) I have a lot of freckles... am somewhat tall (6 foot) broad shoulders and lean.

Some people have said I look like Prince. I figures the reason is because I am King. Though, as king, my rule is limited to the kingdom within myself. I believe that all men are kings and all women = Queens.

I believe that those who have received this very important insight should share themselves (and the kingdom/queendom) with those who still see themselves as rooks, bishops, knights and pawns. Moving across the battlefield, penetrating the enemy defenses and sacrificing themselves for the glory of all and the good of Jah world.

My chess games tend to end in stalemate and I see no problem with that.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Oh, I just love music and mushrooms - mmmm - and the movie Amélie.

music, mushrooms and french chicks... oh my!

Books: Dao De Jing or Tao Te Ching and pretty much anything dealing with Religion, Philosophy or Spirituality also a bit of Conspiracy Theory and World History


the 3 D's Dark City, Donnie Darko, A Scanner Darkly

the 3 G's Garage Days, Girl Interrupted, Go

the 3 H's, Harold and Maude, Heathers, Hedwig and the Angry Inch

I also enjoy Kung Fu movies, from Bruce Lee to Jet Li and other types of Martial Arts films, especially ones starring Tony Jaa.

As well as most modern apocalyptic or post-apocalyptic movies such as the Resident Evil trilogy, Doomsday and even I Am Legend. If it's set in the near future and involves zombies or tribal cannibals I'm down.

Music: from Rozz Williams to RZA ... 45 King to 45 Grave ... an abbreviated listing:

Air, Belle and Sebastian, Black Sabbath, Christian Death, Common, Danzig, David Bowie, Digital Underground, DJ Krush, the Donnas, Flaming Lips, Gravediggaz, Israel Vibration, Jimi Hendrix, Kraftwerk, Lee "Scratch" Perry, Lorena McKennitt, Low, Lush, Lycia, Method Man, Nick Cave, Pere Ubu, Jonathan Richman, Slick Rick, Tosca, Tribe Called Quest, Tricky, Type O Negative, Wu Tang Clan

Food: pretty much anything but raw onions. raw fish (Sashimi and Sushi) on the other hand is one of my favorites. I can't help it, I'm part Japanese!

Currently craving: Brain Tacos
Six things I could never do without
I spend a lot of time thinking about
On a typical Friday night I am
Depends on how much money I've got.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I shave my armpits... and want to be Jillian Michaels.
You should message me if
In no particular order, numbered just for the sake of numbering...

#1) You are that girl from the Progressive commercials.

#2) You rock like Roxy Epoxy of the Epoxies/the Rebounds

#3) You are in anyway like (or can at least empathize with) Veronica (Winona Ryder) in the 1989 movie Heathers and are seeking a slightly more tame version of Jason. (Christian Slater) Or if your personality and or looks are in any way similar to the other roles played by Ryder, i.e. Lydia in Beetle Juice.

#4) Same goes for Fairuza Balk, as seen in: Return to Oz, American History X and The Craft.

#5) as well as Bella Donna and Tory Lane not going to mention the titles here.

(in the event that it hasn't been made obvious, i favor brunettes... then again, like most guys i also like redheads i.e. Molly Ringwald and um Audrey Hollander lol)

#6) You score at least 60% match, 50% friend and under 40% enemy.

This isn't mandatory because as I just found out yesterday, the woman I was with for the past 6 years turns out to be less than a 50% match! So while I'm sure, that, in someway reflects why I'm no longer with her... the point is, if I could be with someone for that long who was that little of a "match" then hey.

#7) You are Voluptuous and proud of it but not so overly proud that it's your life focus and you have some stupid attitude about it either. Just to say, I prefer a girl with a little extra padding (in the right places) who is comfortable being that way and doesn't have the typical "omg i need to lose weight" issues. I'm not really interested in a feeder/feedee relationship by any means and when i say Voluptuous I'm not talking about morbidly obese. I'm not entirely interested in girls that weigh much more than I do (Light Heavy weight) however, I like big butts and I cannot lie.

If you just thought to yourself "but wait, isn't he a personal trainer?" please refer to my journal for a disclaimer!

#8) You are a Traceur

#9) You are a Black Belt

#10) You are an Urban Explorer

#11) You are a Gender Bender

#12) You are a Circuit Bender

#13) You love Futrurama's robot Bender

#14) You have curly hair and you like having curly hair.

#15) You wear glasses, not just any glasses but stylish glasses.

#16) You have tattoos and piercings because you see them as an artistic embellishment of the temple, whereas fake tits and liposuction are a narcissistic way of defiling the temple and you despise "cosmetic" surgery and the people who have it.

#17) You don't think you're too good to drink malt liquor and or fortified wine with me.

#18) You read most or all of my profile and or at least have the decency not to IM me asking what my favorite movies are or if I smoke.

#19) You don't think you're too good to drink malt liquor and or fortified wine with me.

#20) You aren't offended and or think you're too good for racist and sexist jokes, lowbrow humor or just outright immaturity.

Brains come first to me and a sick, twisted, sardonic, cynical, sarcastic sense of humor is a close second. i can be dark oooo morbid ahhhh and scary oh noes! but mainly cuddly .
The two of us