People and relationships come first for me. I can pretty much survive anything when I have a strong community around me, but a paper cut will totally ruin my day if I haven't seen another human being for a week.
I'm neither fatalistic nor naive: I don't think that saying, "The world is a pretty screwed up place" is inherently depressing or cynical, but I do think that saying "...and there's nothing we can do about it, it's human nature, so fuck it, who cares?" is very depressing and cynical.
Careerwise, I'm working a corporate job that pays well but isn't all that meaningful. Its biggest perk is that it gives me a lot of free time with nothing to do in front of a computer, so I get to work on artsy/activisty projects, or just relax and surf the web, depending on how I'm feeling.
- Listening to people's experiences with an open mind
- Making puns
- Rambling (verbally and ambulatorily)
- Playing strategy board games
- Saving the world before bedtime (I wish. Alas, I am not a Powerpuff Girl, and things often can't be fixed that quickly.)
Music: Sweet Honey in the Rock, Bonnie Raitt, Leonard Cohen, the occasional classic rock hit, though I'm always looking for new favorite artists that go beyond the typical cutesy misogynistic love song or whiny breakup ballad.
2) Some quiet, private space to decompress on occasion
3) Role models (not necessarily "heroes," though; I try to avoid putting people on pedestals).
4) Public transit
5) Some kind of ongoing project
6) Access to new and exciting information... via the internet, a library, or whatever other means.
- How to create genuinely equal relationships in an unequal society (or at least how to come closer to that goal. This two-part article is my favorite writing on the subject: http://radtransfem.wordpress.com/2012/01/10/under-duress-agency-power-and-consent-part-one-no/)
- How to remain authentic/accountable in my activism
- How to break down communication barriers, and make things like consent, emotional hangups, fears, hopes and dreams all things we can have genuine conversations about without embarrassment
See what I did there? That was totally smooth and not at all hackneyed, right? Awesome, I totally rock at this.
- If your politics lean generally leftwards and/or anarchist-y.
- If the books/movies/etc. portion of your profile is not the only section of your profile with meaningful content. I'm always happy to talk about media, but I mostly use TV/movies/video games/internet to stave off boredom when I'm on my own at 2AM working a night shift, and it's not the main thing I want to bond over. In other words, I don't need more people to watch Doctor Who with, I need more people in my life who are enjoyable enough to be around that I forget that television exists altogether.
- If you're curious about something in my profile or an answer to a match question. Even if you just want to ask about that one thing and never go on a date; I'm cool with that, I like talking to new people.
- On the other side of the coin: If your profile says you categorically won't date folks who are trans/POC/fat/HIV+/etc., then you're not going to date me either. Your grossness doesn't have to be pointed directly at me for me to distrust you. I will check your match questions. Also true if you fetishize any of the above.