A dreamer. Constantly looking to possibilities outside the mundane. A believer in the fantastical and mystical without falling into the traps of superstition and thoughtless whims. Neither am I dictated by the purviews of traditional religion or science, dragged down from wonder by what I should or shouldn't believe according to social climate. I have created my own spirituality, formed out both my intuition and logic, and I am intrigued by various occult philosophies. According to societal labels I could be tagged as an 'eclectic pagan' or even branded as a 'hippie.' I simply look beyond the surface in a personal quest to delve into what's out there. The threads of reality, so to speak. The reason as to why we're here.
A geek. I am inclined towards creative pursuits such as reading (fantasy and sci-fi), writing, and roleplaying, gaming, music, science (especially biology), history, philosophy, and many other things intellectually oriented or pursued by those of the nerdy or geeky persuasion. I am addicted to the internet.
An artist. Becoming a master at art is a dream goal of mine, and I have a long ways to go. I am a digital artist of sorts, drawing fantasy and supernatural characters, sometimes rendering them in 3D and most of the time, painting them into photoshop on my wacom tablet. It is something I highly enjoy and take pride in. I have also recently fallen in love with ceramics (I make weird sculptures and derpy looking cups), and I fancy myself an oil painter and tend to take an impressionistic style in that format. Message me and I'll send you a link to my deviantart gallery. Lately, I've been spending countless hours just falling into what I call 'art comas.' Getting paid to do it is absolute nirvana, and I just adore getting my vision for people and places out in visual form. I am also a musician, and while I haven't been focusing on that aspect of my life in a while, I am a highly skilled cellist and pianist in both classical and jazz. Been learning guitar for the past few weeks and I'm hilariously bad at it, but picking it up fairly fast. I also write; novels and spiritual ramblings. You can say I'm an artist in many media.
Eccentric and shy. I've never gotten along well with people, but not because I'm stand-offish. It's because I'm a very gentle and timid person, and I tend to close up like a little turtle in public. I'm better online, but I've been always extremely nervous around people and as such I stutter and sometimes act strange. It takes some time for me to open up, but once I do I'm highly loquacious and chatty. Despite my problems regarding talking to people, however, I am an extremely good judge of character and I can read people and their personalities almost better they can do so for themselves. I try to be friends with everyone who wishes to reach out to me, but I'm terrible at starting conversations or friendships so it's better if people talk to me first. Keep that in mind if you consider talking to me. I'll open up eventually if you're patient!
I've avoided talking about this on my profile for a while now, but relationship wise, I am polyamorous. I am a free spirit and prefer being able to date freely. Because of this I am open to dates and flings, but only if I've had the chance to clearly talk to my primary partner about it. Keep in mind that this man will always be my primary partner for the foreseeable future, and I will be utterly honest with him. I have no tolerance for cheating of any kind! And I love my partner far too much to hurt him. If you date me, you'll need to acknowledge that you cannot 'make' me monogamous, much like you can't take a fish out of water and expect it to function well. If you are interested in triads, aka dating both of us, you can do that too; let me know. It'll just take a lot of communication between all three of us.
I am also pansexual, not really all that picky about gender roles and boundaries. I am mostly experienced with cisgender men, but I will also date girls, transgender or genderfluid people of any type. I am utterly open minded and will never judge you for how you wish to express yourself, be it in life or sexuality. (Unless you're into nonconsent or things that are illegal for a reason, then I won't have anything to do with you) Hint: I'm kinky.
As sexually open as I am however, I would like respect. If you shame me for my differences or try to change me in any way, then I will have nothing to do with you. Also if you ever try insulting my intelligence, I will eviscerate you, so be warned. I also do not do well with those who have unyielding conservative mindsets. I will talk to you if you are, but the more rigid your world-view, the less we'll get along. If you're a fellow open-minded individual who wants to explore life and all its possibilities however, feel free to talk to me!
I am rekindling my music, having burnt out for some time but now I'm dabbling in composition and production and learning different ways to apply my existing abilities. I teach a little bit, too.
I am a practicing occultist/witch and am constantly looking for both mentors and peers to help increase my knowledge of the deeper arts. I am neither right nor left hand path. I consider myself a lightworker but I feel moments of delving into the darkness are necessary for true improvement.
And for those who think I'm going to hell: Sure. Maybe. I'd love to argue theology with you.
Just one day at a time for a creative person. I'm determined to succeed despite my unorthodox way of going about life.
I'm also talented at art and music and other forms of expression. It's just something I do. I am perceptive and observant to an extreme, and tend to think outside of the box. In fact, I have no idea where the box even is.
Another talent is my ability to add whimsical awkwardness to almost any situation. This includes stupid cartoon drawings, nonsensical gibberish, or communication entirely in internet memes.
Then, I have a very unique fashion sense. I tend to wear clothes that are not in style at all. Hand-me-downs, goodwill hauls, things on sale... But somehow I make it work. I tend to go for flowing skirts, sweaters, bohemian prints, with a very elven or 'gypsy' style. I wear too much jewelry as well, in the forms of rings, necklaces and bracelets. I am a lover of shineys, it's not my fault!
I am told, with or without makeup, that I look somewhat otherworldly and intimidating in that way. I am told by many I look like an elf, or some sort of fae. I am perfectly okay with this.
My hair is also unique in the way it is not layered and styled, and very long and naturally straggly. The color shifts in hue occasionally, but I have adopted red hair of various shades. I like hair of red shades at the moment--red projects the kind of person I want to be. An open-minded, temperamental oddball with a sensual side.
No, you may not know my natural hair color. It's a mystery.
I am weird and have gotten to the point where I will say things that make absolutely no sense in the context. I am pretty outspoken with my beliefs and while I try to stay tactful, I will inevitably come across with a little bit of assertive, arrogant sass. It works better for me than being shy and awkwardly quiet, but I think I may accidentally annoy people. I have no idea, but at the same time I'm unapologetic for being me.
I read a LOT, so it's tricky to put my favorites here; I have so many.
Fantasy, Horror, Sci-Fi. H.P. Lovecraft, Terry Pratchett, Michael Moorcock, Robin Hobb, Neil Gaiman, Stephen King, George R. R. Martin, R.A. Salvatore, Lloyd Alexander, Frank Herbert, J.K. Rowling (of course), and others.
Plenty of literature as well. The old King Arthur tales, everything from the History of the Kings of Britain, then other things like Morte D'Arthur, Knight of the Cart, and the Once and Future King. (I have a thing for men in armor, especially Lancelot.) Hermann Hesse, George Orwell. And especially the works of Edgar Allen Poe and Shakespeare and Homer.
I also like graphic novels, like Sandman, Maus, V for Vendetta, Watchmen, Ronin, etc. Not a huge fan of traditional superhero comics, but I am well-versed on them enough to hold a conversation.
I also like some non-fiction or works by philosophers, such as Nietzche, Anton LaVey, etc. Religious texts as well as occult, gnostic, shamanism and pagan spirituality, and theories on the Qabalah are all great. Crowley, Agrippa, all those dudes.
Fight Club. Excalibur. The Big Lebowski. Watchmen. A Clockwork Orange. Legend. Rocky Horror Picture Show. Silent Hill. Lord of the Rings. Eyes Wide Shut. Starship Troopers. Deadpool. Repo, the Genetic Opera.
Shows: Supernatural, Black Mirror, Star Trek, Battlestar Galactica, Transformers Prime, Stargate, Firefly, Breaking Bad, True Blood, Doctor Who, Dexter, Rome, Camelot, Spartacus, Game of Thrones, Avatar (Airbender & Korra), Futurama, Ugly Americans, Metalocalypse, Rick and Morty
Anime: Anything by Studio Ghibli/Miyazaki. Cowboy Bebop, Death Note, Berserk, Attack on Titan, Rin, Hellsing Ultimate, Claymore, Samurai Champloo, Ghost in the Shell, plus others I can't think of.
If you noticed, I tend to favor strange movies/shows that are quirky, philosophical, and possibly gritty/dark.
WAY TOO MUCH MUSIC. I love music from all cultures and styles and subcultures. Considering I have thousands upon thousands of artists that I like... I'll name main genres but it will not even scratch the surface of what I like from each one:
Classical: Shostakovich, Rachmoninoff, Elgar, Saint Saens, Tchaikovsky, Bach, Beethoven, Mendelssohn, Chopin, Ravel, Debussy, Mozart
Jazz: Charlie Parker, John Coltrane, Miles Davis, Dizzy Gillespie, Coleman Hawkins, Dexter Gordon, Lester Young, Art Blakey, Thelonious Monk, Quincy Jones, David Baker (I studied jazz cello with him and he was the best teacher I've ever had, period)
Rock. Stoner. Glam. Goth. Grunge.
Metal. Power/Progressive (Rhapsody of Fire, Symphony X, Dream Theater), Thrash (Megadeath, Metallica), Death (Bloodbath, Hypocrisy, Children of Bodom), Black/ened (Immortal, Dimmu Borgir, Naglfar, Behemoth)
Electronic Music. Trance. Psychedelic varieties (psydub, psychill). Dubstep (Excision, Benga, Borgore, etc)
Industrial. (VNV Nation, Velvet Acid Christ, Kidneythieves, Psyclon Nine, Nine Inch Nails, Eisbrecher, Rammstein)
Trip Hop. (Wax Tailor, Massive Attack, )
Some good/older rap (Sound Providers, Del the Funky Homosapien, Tupac, etc. Delve back into the 90s and earlier and you'll probably find something I like.)
And no, I'm not kidding when I'm saying this is the very basic 'scratch the surface' summary of things I know and like.
Seriously, I'm obsessed with music. I will tell you now I tend to eschew the mainstream, but not in the 'hipster' way. I just like things that are a bit offbeat, and more containing skill, creativity and innovation in sound, than pandering to trends or societal desires. To note, however, I have a few guilty pleasure pop artists that I won't mention here. It's a rarity though.
Food: I have the strangest diet you could ever imagine, and it works for me well. I'm a vegetarian, so no meat. I also have celiac disease so I like things that have no wheat barley or rye. I eat way too much yogurt and fruit and granola. Berries are crack to me. I am a hippie so most of what I imbibe is organic and pure and wholesome. I'm not sure how people could live on processed junk on a daily basis, as I can't even taste it without grimacing. I live on 'peasant food.' Though occasionally I like a nice gluten-free pizza. I am also a spicy food addict, and strive to work on my 'spiciness tolerance' on a regular basis, sometimes going to the extent of putting a full habanero pepper in my mouth and survive through the sputtering. It's glorious.
My computer (and wacom tablet.) If I cannot commune daily with the cyber gods and scrawl my weird art into a digital format I become cross. I may need help.
Nature of some sort. If I can't hug a tree or squeal in motherly tones to a flower on some sort of daily basis, then I am not me.
My musical instruments. Cello, piano, guitar. If I don't have regular access to them I will start singing my made-up melodies in my squeaky voice. You don't want that, okay? Okay.
Cute animals, in the access of ridiculous youtube videos as well as my pets. I have two cats and two budgies, and by extension a dog. One cat is a total creepy pervert with a rubber band addiction and has a bad tendency to stare creepily at me when I take showers, but he is my little baby and I love him so very much. The other cat was a wanderer who decided he was never going to leave once he fell in love with us. My budgies love to chirp and preen each other and they're absolutely adorable. If you don't like budgies or birds of any kind you should not date me.
This is obvious, but I need my family and my few friends. They mean so much to me and without them, I probably wouldn't be here writing out this profile.
This could very easily be the longest entry of my already gigantic profile. I think too much. One of my greatest strengths, and perhaps flaws as well.
I'm probably part spider and have myself a spider posse. There is no place I can live for any long period of time without having to deal with a spider infestation somewhere nearby. At any given moment I can expect a spider either crawling up the wall or staring at me with its multitude of eyes. Arachnophobes beware.
I have an obsessive personality. Get me interested in something and I'm hooked. It can be dangerous.
Psychologically, in the Myers-Briggs/Jungian sense, I'm a cross between an INFJ and INFP and tend to oscillate majorly between the two types. Judging and Perceiving traits are never truly set in stone for me, but I am very strongly introverted, intuitive and feeling. This may or may not reveal a lot about my personality.
I am sex positive and a little bit of a pervert. No, that does not mean I will have sex with you.
I'm here for friends and those of similar interests. I will probably respond if you message, but I prefer lengthier messages about why you're messaging me, so I have a better base on which to respond. I really do want friends, more people to connect to. It doesn't matter where you are or who you are... if you feel we can have a good basis to message from, please send something over!
I'm a little more hesitant about meeting potential partners, however, and prefer to base everything in friendship first. Keep that in mind when you talk to me. I'm not into one-night-stands or 'hookups' but I am okay with more casual intimate relationships. Communication is key.
To note, if all you have to say is 'hi', 'hey there,' 'ur hot' or 'wanna hook up' then I will not respond. I don't like small-talk, so prepare something for me to respond to in a more expandable context. It doesn't have to be a novel, but you do have to pique my interest. ;)
I've had a lot of problems with this lately. Don't message me if you don't have something interesting to present to me, and if you say something sexual about me off the bat (or try to insult my intelligence) then you will see what I mean when I am a Spider Queen. This includes the fangs and the venom.
Oh, and you should message me if you've read my entire profile to the word. That is impressive to me. I may quiz you later. (That doesn't mean you HAVE to however, I know it's long)
ALSO YOU NEED AN ACTUAL PICTURE. VERY IMPORTANT. I will NOT respond to anyone without some sort of identifier.