45Snoqualmie, United States
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My self-summary
I laugh a lot. Been accused of leaning way to the left side of sarcasm. I play a lot of sports. Raising two young kids half the time. I'm honest and direct. I expect the same.

My kids are my life. I share custody so I have half the time to make plans, live it up, and sometimes just relax. I am independent almost to a fault. I love adventure.....bungee jumping, mud wrestling, a good water balloon toss, cliff jumping into rivers/lakes. I love staying in as much as I love going out.

Don't message me if you are married, have an open relationship or don't like kids. I am not going to hook up with you so don't message me if that is your intention. Save your mack daddy lines and want to be clever repartee for someone else :)

The two things I find sexy about a man are the way he carries himself (confidence, demeanor, charisma, kindness, humor & communication) and his voice. Also, I am a big fan of voluptuous lips, hands and amazing massages. I am a sucker for dimples, braces and a clean shaven face. I love scruffy faces to but can rarely resist touching a soft, fresh shaven face.

Honestly? Dimples and humor get me every time.

Deal breakers....
* if you aren't funny
* if you use any drugs/smoke
* if you have a photo of your abs but not your face
* if you are married, or have an "open" relationship
* if you are often called passive agressive
* if you spend more than you make (i am debt free)
* if you are selfish, a liar, a cheater or generally unkind
* If you are looking for casual sex, don't message me unless you're hot. KIDDING....don't.

My faith and my kids come first and I have a very busy life. So if you are co-dependant and needy, do us both a favor, don't message me.
What I’m doing with my life
Trying to be the best version of myself I can. Planning my next vacation. Making up "your momma so fat" jokes so when the 90's humor comes back, I am ready.
I’m really good at
Making people laugh
Cooking (and eating)
Being brave
Wine/Beer tasting
Planning vacation
The first things people usually notice about me
My clavicles.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books? Bible. The Slight Edge. Love and Respect.
Movies? Favs are Tombstone, Braveheart, Gone with the Wind, Hangover, The Butler, The Help. I mainly watch documentaries on food, GMO's, factory farms, etc....
Favorite broadway show is WICKED.
Music? Country, Rock, Old School but I like most music.
Food? Comfort food, fresh grown in the garden food, Italian and Thai (I have finally graduated to a #2 on the Thai heat scale! BOOM! Making progress).

I love cooking and being cooked for :) I am a fantastic dish washer so if you just might be the way to my heart.
Six things I could never do without
My kids
Intimacy (especially kissing)
I spend a lot of time thinking about
how i can retire early....
Why we don't teach nutrition and the actual health benefits of whole foods in schools. And how I got blessed with such great kids.
On a typical Friday night I am
Nothing is typical in my life. Every other Friday I am with my super fun little kiddos. The other Fridays I fly by the seat of my pants. (WTH does that mean anyway? Who has flying pants? NO one!)
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I sing in the shower.
You should message me if
You are engaging and funny
You can enjoy some Dom at a gala and Coors Light while dirt bike riding or tailgating after softball
You love yellow (actually this has no relevance)
You sing karaoke (even poorly - ok this doesn't matter either)
Reading any part of this made you laugh out loud (LOUD not a hearty chuckle)
You don't take yourself or life to seriously
Any of the above will suffice
The two of us