29 Manhattan, United States
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My self-summary
Technically, I live in Connecticut, but I spend half the week and every weekend in Manhattan, when I'm not traveling for work.

If you can't figure out my first name from my "super creative" username, maybe consider messaging someone else..or just ask for my name? At the very least, don't get rude when I correct you or message me with some snarky comment. Contrary to apparently popular opinion, jerk is not attractive on anyone. Hint: it's NOT Laura or Laurie (is the second one even an actual name???).
What I’m doing with my life
I work in Sales/Marketing for a clothing company. Sadly, they manufacture Uniforms, so I don't get to take home a killer new wardrobe.

I moved back east after 10 years in California to help a family member get through some medical things. Luckily, my job is cool with me working from anywhere as long as I agree to travel when needed. I will move to the city as soon as I'm not longer needed to help out with the medical things, hopefully in the next couple months.

I spend most of my time in Manhattan, for meetings and bar hopping on the weekends; but I live and usually sleep in Connecticut or crash on a friend's air mattress in the city (I have awesome friends).

I also host a ton of events in the city in my free time (scavenger hunts, single's mixers, etc.) Kind of kills my social life, but I love it.
I’m really good at
Talking to complete strangers. Drinking and making an ass out of myself. Procrastinating. Surprising people with my knowledge of sports and beer. Taking shots without a chaser; and not wincing.
The first things people usually notice about me
I'm outgoing and I like to drink.

I work a lot. If I'm not doing my day job, I'm most likely hosting an event, so a relaxing night in watching Netflix is very much appreciated.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: Catcher in the Rye, The Hottest State, The Harry Potter Series.

Movies: Princess Bride, Dirty Dancing, Stardust.

Shows: American Horror Story, Kimmy Schmidt, Daredevil, Bored to Death, The League, Live Baseball.

Music: Twenty One Pilots, Imagine Dragons, Maroon 5, so many more.

Food: Sushi, Italian, Whole Foods Hot Food Bar on days I'm too lazy to cook.
The six things I could never do without
The obvious ones: Family/Friends, Cell Phone, Beer

Not so obvious: Uber/Lyft, Art Museums, My Cat (she's a little brat, but I love her).
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Why are A-Rod's lips purple?

Why do so many guys think it's totally acceptable to turn hostile/send threatening messages to a stranger when they're faced with rejection?!
On a typical Friday night I am
Either hosting an event, drinking enough to send inappropriate texts that I cringe at in the morning OR watching Netflix from the comfort of my bed.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I keep a fake engagement ring in my wallet for the nights I host single's events. People frequently mistake my friendly "host" personality for flirting. When they don't listen to me saying "I'm not interested" I throw the ring on and claim to be engaged. 💍

I lived with a super gruff marine in Monterey for two years who used to refer to me as the "girly-est tomboy" he's ever met. I took it as a massive compliment. If you're looking for a girly-girl who drinks excessively and is super passionate about sports, I'm your girl.
You should message me if
You're capable to forming a message longer than "Yo" or "Hey" or "Sup" or "You Sexy".

You're down to get drunk on our first date. I'm an IPA and Shots kind of girl (Jameson is my shot of choice). No Vodka. 🍻

You're fine with not hanging out a whole lot on weekdays (some weeknights!), and having a blast with me on the weekends. (I have plenty of friends I can/do stay with in the city on weekends, but you should also be OK with US having some sleepovers...)

Update: I am not looking for a one-night-stand. It's New York, if that's what I wanted it wouldn't be much of a challenge finding a random guy in a bar. I also have no interest in starting a long distance sext relationship with a stranger in another country. Nor do I have any interest in going to a strangers hotel room for sex while they're on vacation in NY. ALSO, If you aren't ok with meeting for drinks, in a public, mutually convenient place, please don't message me. Who would go to a strangers apartment??? Does that honestly work?? Sorry if this sounds super bitchy, I'm just getting super frustrated over the shady messages I'm receiving on here. 😩

Update two: I have age guidelines for a reason. If you're old enough to be my Dad DO NOT message me. And please none of that "you're being an ageist" BS. There are plenty of age appropriate women on this website that you can message. 😡

Update three: Honestly, this is getting really frustrating...Maybe re-read your message before hitting send? If you say "man that comes off as super creepy" don't send it. I will respond with something super snarky. Fair warning.