31Pittsburgh, United States
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
What I’m doing with my life
Day job: God of Hoagies. Sounds pretentious, I know, but if the guys at Subway get to call themselves artists, then I need a proportionately accurate term. They assemble pieces, I make the sandwich from scratch. I work with a blank canvas, they paint by number.

Outside of work, I design board games. I currently have four that are playable and a dozen that are in the works. I'd like to get them published and quit my day job, but it's a difficult world to break into.
I’m really good at
You know that scene in Sherlock Holmes where he completely dissects Watson's fiancee's life with one cursory glance? I'm pretty good at that too, but I'm a little more socially conscious so I keep my observations to myself.

I'm also pretty good at math and useless trivia.

And I recently invented a new way to whistle, which is handy since I couldn't whistle before.
The first things people usually notice about me
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Authors/Books: Robert Anton Wilson, Hunter S Thompson, Douglas Adams, Orson Scott Card, Kurt Vonnegut, Isaac Asimov, HP Lovecraft, Brandon Sanderson, and Franz Kafka; The Wheel of Time series, His Dark Materials trilogy, Discworld, A Song of Ice and Fire, Principia Discordia, A Prayer for Owen Meany, House of Leaves, and several graphic novels. Big fan of sci-fi and high fantasy, but I'll read anything that makes me think.

Directors/Movies: David Lynch, Judd Apatow, Matt Stone & Trey Parker, Hiyao Miyazaki, Joss Whedon, Richard Ayaode, and Wes Anderson; Tommy Boy, Phil the Alien, Six-string Samurai, Role Models, Zombieland, Scott Pilgrim vs. the World, Equilibrium, Dark City, Dr. Horrible's Sing-along Blog, The Man from Earth, Synechdoche NY, Kick-Ass, and Seven Pounds. I really like movies.

TV: Arrested Development, Lost, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, The Office, Weeds, Breaking Bad, Cowboy Bebop, Firefly, Flight of the Conchords, Modern Family, The IT Crowd, Louie, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles(original series and current), Death Note, Darker Than Black, Speed Grapher, Bleach, Dragonball Z, Monster, Attack on Titan, and Titus. I also really like TV.

Music: Blind Melon, System of a Down, Serj Tankian, Weezer, Cake, The Mountain Goats, Flobots, Pearl Jam, Flight of the Conchords, Tenacious D, and The Lonely Island. Not a big music person, I'm more of a visual guy. Listening to music, I either ignore everything else around me, or ignore the music. I have trouble finding a middle ground.

Food: My favorite is almost any pasta dish with tomato sauce. However, I'm a terrible cook, so anything homemade is delicious to me. It's easier to name the things I don't like, including mushrooms, olives, peppers, pineapple, liver, cole slaw, and sauer kraut.
Six things I could never do without
Truth, lies, white lies, black lies, True Lies on DVD, and my epidermis.

Seriously though, I'm a minimalist. I could lose everything and I'd be fine. As long as I still have my ideas.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Politics, philosophy, art, math, science, the future, my games, and what I will sing at karaoke.

Also jokes that are only funny because they are so bad. And jokes that are only funny to me. And un-jokes.

Also, the Fermi paradox.

Also, why women say they enjoy intelligent conversation and then don't respond when I ask them about the Fermi Paradox. That shit is intriguing.

Also, why do so many dudes have their gender set to woman these days? For the record, I'm not referring to transgender women, I'm not an asshole. I'm talking about bros who apparently think the "Sex" option is asking who they want to bang.
On a typical Friday night I am
Wishing I had a typical Friday night.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
None of your business
You should message me if
You're good company. You enjoy board games, comedy, and/or karaoke. You're pro-cannabis. All of these are acceptable reasons.

Also, feel free to just say hi. I'm a bit of an introvert when it comes to new people. I'm terrible at starting conversations, but excellent at making them meaningful.
The two of us