31Newport, United States
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My self-summary
Oh hey I didn't see you there. I'm Michael. Welcome to my profile. [insert="FlamingWelcome.gif"]

I'm a pretty chill person. I don't take anything too seriously. I'm an introvert. I read a lot. I like video games and arguing with strangers on the internet.

I'm a big fan of sleep. And generally just relaxing and not worrying about things. Anxiety is for the birds. If I could spend the rest of my life wearing a pair of underwear and a kimono I would. I don't drink. I really think getting drunk as a hobby is one of the saddest things ever. So I'm not too keen on parties or bars. Unless they have an awesome jukebox and you like to play pool. I'll smoke a joint with you though.

When I was younger I used to think I was the protagonist in the story of my life. Heroic shit. Very egocentric and morally superior. You know, idealist stuff. Then I got older and realized I was actually playing the villain in my life. Self sabotage and all that. Pushing people away. Tying women to train tracks. Nowadays I think I'm more of the ambivalent news anchor at the end of the movie who sums everything up in a really, "Two more hours til I get off work" kind of way because the writer was too lazy to write a proper ending. Just kind of there, waiting for the credits to start rolling so I can go home cook dinner with my cat. The point is, I'm kind of at that point in my life where I'm looking for a co-anchor. Heroes and villains need not apply.

What that means is, I know who I am. But I don't have the strength to help you figure out who you are.
What I’m doing with my life
Being a homosexual, so naturally causing natural disasters and ruining marriages. It's pretty taxing, and certainly doesn't pay well.

Working, working out. I stopped smoking cigarettes and got fat. I don't actually think smoking had anything to do with that, that's just what people say, so I'm saying it too. Dump cancer, get heart disease! That's my motto.
I’m really good at
Trivia. About pretty much anything. I'm not very smart, but I know a lot of shit.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
The classics. Sci-fi. Vladmir Nabokov, Ernest Hemingway, Ira Levin, Ray Bradbury, Philip K Dick, John Steinbeck. Seriously could this list get any more "I'm angry and sad at the world and a half priced books just opened in my town"? On the real though, My favorite books are The Sun Also Rises, Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?, The Maltese Falcon, The Stepford Wives, Lolita, and pretty much anything by Kurt Vonnegut. Except Slapstick. It's terrible. Dracula is way underrated (for real). Animal Farm is so good I don't even like telling people I like it. Same for Ender's Game and Rosemary's Baby. This list changes a lot depending on whether I value style or substance that day. Like, East of Eden is amazing. But god damn it's boring as fuck.

Movies are cool. Old horror. Suspense. Vertigo. Metropolis. M. Anything in black and white that makes people say, "Really? You like this?" Idk I'll watch anything really. Superhero movies, though, are super lame.

I don't watch much TV. I have a soft spot for Seinfeld though. Anime sucks.

80s goth. Experimental metal. Post-punk, Industrial. I never really stopped being fifteen years old when it comes to music. Siouxsie and the Banshees, The Cure, Bauhaus (real obscure stuff, man). I really like The Smiths. Some ultra weird Visual-kei, 90s cutter music = The Smashing Pumpkins, Marilyn Manson and stuff. I really hate singer songwriter hipster music. Something about upper middle class white kids singing about living in box cars and working on a chain gang really pisses me off. Yes, Bob Dylan counts.

I'm also really into classical music too. But probably because I play way too much Piano Tiles 2. Fuckin' Vivaldi, man.

I don't eat food.
Six things I could never do without
Rainy days
Clean, warm socks
Long hot showers
A heavy comforter or blanket
A nice pair of headphones.
A cat or two.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
The shade of it all
On a typical Friday night I am
Reading. Watching the X-Files with my cat.

Yeah, that's all.
You should message me if
Idk I'm not gonna tell you what to do, I'm not your mother.
The two of us