funkdup_k
34 Bristol, United Kingdom
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
funkdup_k
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
My self-summary
Ex-Londoner WLTM assorted people for interesting times in Bristol.

Ruffled | Burner | genderforking | feminist | fresh-air-type | poly | no-frills | warm | snuggly | generous | loving | introvert | queer

I've stolen this quote from a friend but it's pretty accurate: I'm 10% life of the party, 90% surfer of corners and one-on-one enthusiast. I'm happiest in the company of a few select friends or supporting those who like to rabble-rouse. Occasionally, I'll be rabble-rousing myself. I'm especially vocal when it comes to political activism, protesting against public sector cuts (especially to the NHS and legal aid), protecting LGBTQ spaces and generally supporting the underdog.

I fucking hate the Tories.

When I'm not working or parenting or being annoyed about the right-wing desecration of the country, I like to take long, hot baths and look at cat memes on the Internet. Just like everybody else.
What I’m doing with my life
I'm a midwife by trade. I've been a midwife for over a decade. I'm trying to find a way to fund my PhD, but NHS trusts don't want to lose a midwife on the ground to go off and spend five years with their noses in a book. So, for the time being, I'm still a midwife. **edit, September 2016: I've just returned from volunteering in the refugee camps in Greece. I think I'm best placed to do humanitarian work rather than continue to grind the cogs in the NHS machine. However, this doesn't pay, so I'm currently looking for some sort of halfway-house solution. Let me know if you think of anything!**

I'd like to say I have a Plan B, in case the ridiculous NHS bureaucracy all gets too much. However, I'm not entirely sure what it would be. Something combining advocacy, living off-grid and coffee would be good.

I'm learning to juggle and draw and hoop and swing. Dance, not the other one. Although I'm cool with that too.
I’m really good at
Mucking in.

Being alternatively idle then ferociously active.

Spreading kindness.

Sticky love.

Noticing architecture.

Making vegan tofu chocolate cheesecake.

Finding sweet little places to camp out.

Parenting. I have an adorable and beautiful seven-year-old who is my absolute favourite person :)
The first things people usually notice about me
I smile a lot.

Physically; the psychedelic watercolour half-sleeve tattoo, lip piercing and big stompy DMs are usual identifying features.

If I'm at a party, you'll probably notice either the face paint, fancy dress or nudity first.

If we are at the pub, you'll notice that I'm slightly socially awkward, bespectacled and "traditionally built".

Or; I'm concentrating intensely on my drum and bass face.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
This conversation is better had in person but a brief list off the top of my head reads:

Books- the Classics. Non-fiction. Philosophical, anthropological or feminist texts. Oscar Wilde. BDSM. Sexual sub-culture. The Walking Dead. Just started on Neil Gaiman (bit late, here).

Movies (or, 'Films', as I like to call them)-
Eternal Sunshine. The Artist. Shrek. Secretary. Hedwig ATAI. Shortbus. I'm not a fan of big box office action-hero big explosion-type films.

What are shows? Like, Les Mis? I saw it, it was okay. I don't really watch anything talent/ celeb/ dance competition- based unless I *really* need my brain to switch off and to just stare numbingly at the screen for a while. I like David Attenborough and Chris Packham. In fact, I have a little crush on Chris Packham. Hmm.

Music- I'm pretty into my music. Recently, I've seen Ben Folds Five, Amon Tobin, Bon Iver, Amanda F. Palmer, the Knife and Bitter Ruin live. If you know who Kathryn Williams or James Blake are, chances are that we'll get on fine.

When I'm not doing Responsible Child-Rearing things, I love to get my mosh on. D&B, ragga, EDM, reggae and anything with a decent stomping beat to it. I recently saw a set by Addictive TV, which blew my mind. I love the blending of media and sound.

I don't watch actual TV. I'm working my way through the Netflix back catalogue. So far: Breaking Bad, OITNB, Green Wing, Black Books. Next up: Hunger Games, maybe The Wire> I have had so many friends tell me it's worth it but tbh that Baltimore accent is really hard to understand and the first episode just didn't grab me. I should definitely persevere though, right?

Food- I don't eat celery. Disgusting and completely unnecessary. I eat pretty much anything else but adore crispy fried tofu from Soho Diner, roasted beetroot and dill risotto and 85% chocolate.

Drink- Clipper tea, Monmouth coffee, Rioja, whiskey sours.
The six things I could never do without
My son
My mind
An occupation of some sort

...and three frivolous ones...
Coffee
Cake
Kink
I spend a lot of time thinking about
-Cats and their paws- have you ever noticed how their paw pads smell like popcorn?
-We are the media
-Whether The Thick Of It was actually a blindingly brilliant psychic experiment
Introspective self-development
-What will be my next Big Thing
-That Person (is it you?)
-Whether this whole '20 ways to see if you're a secret introvert' fad is useful or not
-Travel
-My next costume
-How to make my brain do assorted magical things
On a typical Friday night I am
Using my Oyster card.

Recent Friday nights have included squiggling around doing something vaguely rude with friends; at a kinky costume party; eye-gazing at complete strangers at a non-verbal dating event.

Summertime: Fridays will mainly be spent dancing in a field/ a wood/ near a bonfire under the stars somewhere. I like little festivals and Burner events where the big names aren't important but the community is.

Wintertime: nesting. Baking. Knitting. Reading. Playing board games. Countryside walks. Art.

What I *won't* be doing is sweating nervously in the corner of a club somewhere whilst noisy, intoxicated people down shots around me. I'm 32 going on 40 and I'm totally ok with never seeing the inside of a club again. If this is something that you live for, we possibly aren't going to match. The only exception to this is Rumpus, because it's basically a festival/ house party crossover, and it's run by awesome friends of mine. Yep.

Raves, OTOH, gimme. I firmly believe that there are not many of life's problems that can't be ironed out by stomping around at a decent rave.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I wear Crocs at work.

I have a disability. It does affect my life and it is increasingly visible. I am the Queen of Owning My Shit, though. I have found that people's reactions to my disability is a pretty good filter for their general attitudes. I'm very happy to talk more specifically about this to interested and suitable people.
You should message me if
You own your shit. Seriously; no man-children please.

We have a 80% match or above.

You're a feminist and accept non-monogamy and alternative sexualities; you understand non-binary genders and consent culture.

You're equally at home making sofa forts and watching Pixar as you are at a queer cabaret cheering on drag kings.

I subscribe to the 'Fuck Yes' school of thought: https://markmanson.net/fuck-yes
If you believe you can make me exclaim 'Fuck yes!' then let's go...

You fancy hanging out at a little festival or gig or anywhere that's not a trendy pop-up bar where beer is £6 a pint.

If you know what Rumpus, KSL, SH or NEST are.
More