I'm imagining that you love going out, but not every night. You stay home some but almost never watch television. You read books. You have a hobby that lets you be creative. You enjoy cooking, conversation, and board games.
I don't think it's helpful to pigeonhole relationships before they happen, because you never know where things will lead. It could start with someone to hang out with one or two nights a week and get to know. Even if that's all it is, it sounds pretty good, right? Then, if you're lucky, maybe it will be someone who gets you, who finds you attractive, and just maybe can curl your toes in bed. But most importantly, someone who will always observe Wheaton's Law. Always. ("Don't be a dick")
I'm always looking to get to know amazing new people, and just see what happens. I have space and time in my life for the right person, so it's just a matter of time until the right one happens by. If I've learned anything, it's that no relationship is worth having without open, honest, and frequent communication.
If you are in an open relationship or have experience with one, I want to hear your story. I have made some great friends in the Columbus polyamorous community, and have had good luck in "secondary" style relationships with wonderful women who could surprise me and teach me more about myself.
A bit more about me:
I have one daughter, 12, who is the true love of my life. You won't meet her for quite a while but I will talk about her occasionally if we start chatting. I have her 50% of the time, and I don't generally mix parenting and dating. I am on good terms with my ex, we cooperate on parenting with no drama.
I think it's very important to stay active, both mentally and physically. Some things I like doing in my free time include all but two of the following things: Traveling, bicycling, hiking, rollerblading, cooking, conversation, yoga, seeing a live band, karaoke, dancing, playing boardgames, armed robbery, cow tipping.
Helping my friends achieve their goals whenever possible. Lately, that has meant helping a lot of them move.
(just kidding-- You're getting pancakes)
Explaining rules to complicated board games and card games. Current favorites are Agricola, Pandemic, Innovation, or Terra Mystica.
Home maintenance projects. Painting rooms, hanging blinds, etc. There's always something.
Deep conversations interspersed with inappropriate jokes.
Update-- I have a beard now, in case that matters to you, but I haven't taken new pictures yet. You have to imagine what it looks like or just meet me.
BOOKS: I read whatever looks interesting at the time. Certain books have been pivotal at different times in my life, most recently "Return to Life", by Jim Tucker. Also Guns, Germs and Steel. Sex at Dawn. A mix of self improvement and science fiction books. The Honor Harrington series by David Weber. I don't believe in keeping books after I've read them, unless they are in the top 5% of everything I've read. And yet I still own more bookshelves than chairs.
MOVIES: I enjoy movies, but only a few are good enough to be quoted later. Here are a few of mine:
The Fifth Element-- "Does anyone else want to negotiate?", the Die Hards-- "Yipee Kai Yay, motherfucker"
Forrest Gump-- "Life is like a box of chocolates".
Team America World Police-- "America. Fuck Yeah"
The Big Short-- "Short everything this guy has ever touched"
TV: I haven't had any live TV channels in years, but I like watching DVD's of old shows. Any Star Trek series. Farscape. (You just can't beat muppets in space.) Hell, anything in space. Game of Thrones, Six Feet Under. Magnum PI, Orphan Black.
I do not subscribe to cable, (or Netflix or Hulu, etc.) not because all the shows are crappy, but because they are so good. I know I'm missing out on all the new hotness, but I really don't need more stuff to suck up my time. I only recently got some rabbit ears just to watch Big Bang Theory.
MUSIC: All the things. Where would we be without Pandora? Right now my favorite Pandora stations are Rush, Green Day, The Pet Shop Boys, Bowling For Soup, Arcade Fire, Tony Bennett. But I like just about everything, music-wise. Old standards can sometimes make my neck hair stand up.
PODCASTS: Savage Love, Radiolab, The Secret Cabal, This American Life, Penn's Sunday School, Rachel Maddow
FOOD: My favorite is what I cook myself, although I have been hitting Bibibop a ton lately. I just moved into a new apartment, so I'm still getting used to my new kitchen. Please share your recipes with me. (Fyi, I'm vegetarian, but not vegan. Eggs and cheese make me happy)
A sense of fairness.
A sense of purpose.
A sense of direction.
A sense of community.
I have certain core beliefs that not everyone may share (you don't need to agree with all this but you must be ok with me believing it) :
Life is not even remotely fair, but if you're lucky it generally evens out. I believe destiny is a combination of the results of our decisions and also a heavy scoop of luck. Blind, stupid, meaningless, random luck, both good and bad, is real. Sometimes bad things happen to good people, and vice versa. This is no excuse for being lazy, our lives are still solely our own responsibilities, and we all need to play the hand we're dealt the best we can. Sometimes it can be difficult to distinguish between the consequences of our decisions and just pure luck. Or the ways we are affected by the decisions of others. Often it is a combination. I have been immensely lucky throughout my life. How we choose to react to events and circumstances in our lives makes all the difference in our own lives and those we touch. We may reincarnate or we may only live once, but either way, there are no do-overs and everything counts.
I think most people need adversity in their lives to stimulate personal growth. Sometimes blessings or curses can be disguised as the other. This in no way diminishes the importance of helping others.
Self Improvement. How to be even more awesome. Self improvement is something I think everyone should be working on most of the time. In particular, I think a lot about how to be the best dad I can be. My daughter amazes me every day, but I'm probably biased.
And cooking, but I already talked about that.
UPDATE: I suck at karaoke but it's fun anyway.
Eminem and Rihanna's "Love the Way You Lie" puts a lump in my throat.
I shower with my clothes on to save money on laundry. Sometimes I can go weeks without being naked. This is completely not true.
I had a doctor's appointment once and when they measured my height, it was 5' 10"-- One inch taller than I thought I was for the last 20 years! That was a nice surprise. Yay, me! UPDATE: That was rounding error. I really am just 5'9". Oh well. It was fun to be taller for a few weeks.
(There must be a ton of you out there with premium memberships, because I'm getting about 5 times as many "likes" as visitors.)
...You are still thinking about it after having read this far. Or maybe you just skipped to this part. Doesn't matter. This is a dating website, not a mail order spouse website, so I have absolutely no expectations beyond finding out what you are like and going from there.
..You swear creatively. Jesus Christ in a Sidecar.
...You have at least a passing interest in physical fitness and eating healthy. I'm not a body snob, but I do work out more days than not. If your idea of a workout is climbing one flight of stairs or looking for the remote under the couch cushions, that's not a good sign.
...You know who Dan Savage is and agree with him on most issues. Actually, go Google him right now if you aren't familiar. I'll wait. He will be your new favorite podcaster.
...You still have things on your bucket list that you are interested in trying.
...You have a favorite movie quote. The pithier the better.
...You won't sell all my furniture on Craigslist while I'm at work. Unless I ask you to.
...You love playing Euro style board games, card games, or if you own some d20's and know how to use them.
...You have a home improvement project and you want to swap manual labor.
...You are tired of all the losers on this site sending you their dick pictures. Why do people do that? Seriously.
...You don't put too much value on these percentage scores-- I find most of the questions irrelevant or hard to weight correctly. I've found that a 99% match guarantees nothing in terms of chemistry.
...You understand that love is not something you find. Compatibility must be found, but Love is something you choose to do.
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