< TL;DR >
I'd really like my best friend, make-out buddy, and chief co-conspirator to be one and the same person.
So would you.
You are scarysmart and creative, geeky and cool. Your personal integrity means more to you than anything else. Playful mental sparring turns you on, and You are grateful for every thing, every moment, and every breath.
< /TL;DR >
If you think that was a bit long for a TL;DR, you haven't scrolled to the end of my profile yet. Here's what one critic had to say:
"A disconnected, rambling, and truly bizarre missive" - Ted Kaczynski, author of The Unabomber's Manifesto
And a literary critic for The New York Times, speaking under condition of anonymity, raved: "I just couldn't put it down.... enough. There simply are no words that come even close to conveying what an awful piece of garbage it truly is."
My intent to build a long-term, loving partnership with a woman who has a deep sense of personal integrity, and is something of a math, science, and computer geek. I'm also open to befriending or dating you if you have these qualities, but you aren't interested in that level of involvement. There are other situations I might consider as well.
The example given to illustrate the definition of sapiosexuality on unwords.com pretty much sums it up for me:
"Me? I don't care too much about the looks. I want an incisive, inquisitive, insightful, irreverent mind. I want someone for whom philosophical discussion is foreplay. I want someone who sometimes makes me go 'Ouch!' due to their wit and evil sense of humor. I want someone that I can reach out and touch randomly. I want someone I can cuddle with. I decided this all means that I am sapiosexual."
Apart from your uncompromising sense of personal integrity and your general intellectual prowess, other things about you that I most appreciate are: your ability and willingness to communicate directly and clearly, especially when I'm a completely clueless ass; your commitment to improve yourself and the world around you in whichever ways you deem important; your level of science/math/computer geekiness; your habitual and almost compulsive creativity with sound, words, images, or ideas; your general playfulness; your honesty, courage, generosity, patience, fortitude, gentleness, and kindness; your ability to be vulnerable with me; your affectionate nature; the way we complement each other and shelter each other from life's inevitable passing storms; the way it feels as if the contours of your body were custom-made to fit mine when I put my arms around you; our sexual chemistry and compatibility; the way we love and respect each other.
Looks can be somewhat important to me, and there definitely are certain distinct appearance "types" who easily arouse my interest in a reflexive sort of way, but it takes a very special woman to hold my attention; and if you are she, I will grow to see you as more and more stunningly beautiful the longer you stick around, no matter how you might appear to others.
As for me: I'm a complex superposition of the ordinary and the unique. I am decidedly quirky, yet mostly harmless. Many have remembered me upon meeting again long years after a single brief introduction, but like any other acquired taste it takes time and experience to develop a full appreciation for some of my finer qualities.
My interests and talents form a constellation which places me squarely in the geekier regions of the nerd-jock continuum; my computers run Ubuntu and my devices are Android.
Politics are important to me, and I am an activist for progressive societal change. I lend moral and, where I can, material support to what I believe to be the primary mission of each human person: to grow towards his or her own full potential, and to help others to do the same. I believe that the spirit of service without expectation of reward is the road to nirvana. I hold myself, my intimates, and all those with whom I choose to associate to a high standard of personal integrity, yet I recognize that we all make mistakes and come from different places, so progress, rather than perfection, forms the yardstick by which I measure myself and others.
I banished the phrase "the opposite sex" from my thought and speech quite some years ago, replacing it with "the complementary sex". This simple shift in one word radically improved my relationships with women in every context, and revolutionized my entire perspective on human sexuality.
I am a highly social and sexual person, who tends to care about others deeply and permanently. I need friends, lovers, and - most especially - friends who are lovers, and I regard all three - friendship, love, and sex - as important synergic, yet distinct, needs.
Potential Dealbreakers for You
I've got my share of blemishes, dings, bruises and baggage, some of which are fairly common dealbreakers for others. I believe it's best to be open about such things so neither of us will experience a completely avoidable disappointment. Feel free to ask me questions about these items, or anything else, if you wish. I won't consider it an intrusion, and I'll politely decline to answer when I choose privacy or circumspection.
The first thing you should know about me is that have been living with Behçet's (beh-CHETS) disease for over 30 years. It's a chronic, incurable, autoinflammatory condition which can be fatal. You cannot catch it from me. The severity of my symptoms fluctuates and sometimes they can be quite debilitating. This illness keeps me from working at a normal job and also negatively affects my memory, attention, and concentration (on top of pre-existing ADHD, which was identified waaaaaay before it was trendy). This make it difficult for me to keep order in my surroundings and these neurocognitive effects make it hard for me to be completely autonomous and independent in certain areas of self-care (e.g., managing medications, and their inventories; and some usual adult responsibilities (prety much any kind of even very simple paperwork takes a veeeerrry long time, or never gets done no matter how I try; straightening up after myself, but not because I'm being an inconsiderate ass).
I really, really hate driving, and I will do just about anything to avoid it. I'm also not that goood at it. Hey, James Bond has his license to kill, and I've got mine. Also, I've never owned a car apart from one I briefly acquired to give to my then girlfriend as a gift.
I have baggage; I was raised in a violent and emotionally abusive environment, and although I have done a lot of work to overcome the aftermath of that history, certain things still can trigger me into flashbacks of difficut memories.
I do not drink alcohol nor do I use other recreational drugs of any kind, other than caffene. The main reason I do not drink or take drugs is that they were problematic in the very distant (28+ year ago) past. I am fine with your drinking in moderation, but I prefer not to associate with people who use other drugs recreationally, whether or not it is problem for them. Quite to the contrary, most of my friends are actively involved in the recovery lifestyle.
I am dangerously allergic to dogs. I can't live in the same house as a dog or ride in a car where one has recently been. I'm also allergic to cats, but not nearly as badly.
I have a strong preference both to stay here on Maui and in the apartment I currently own, and that I have found that my love relationships are more harmonious when my partner and I maintain separate homes, but spend most nights together.
I am considerably overweight but damned sexy nonetheless.
(Note to any language purists reading this profile: It's time to face the fact that English has yet again simplified its declensions by borrowing a new set of third person singular neuter gender personal pronouns from those used in the third person plural. And yes, I do punctuation around quotations the "wrong" way, but the "correct" usage is logically inconsistent with the purpose of quotation marks in the first place. Grow up and get over it.)
➤ Caring for my aged mother in NYC.
➤ Going from place to place in metal tubes with wings.
➤ Having a blast despite living with a rare, incurable, sometimes disabling, and potentially fatal chronic illness.
➤ Being too sexy for my cat.
➤ Sneezing around dogs.
➤ Milking that whole "Yeah, I knew Feynman - He was my physics teacher." thing for all I can.
➤ Geeky, nerdy stuff that does not lend itself to quite as much braggadocio.
➤ Mathy shit, too. With equations. Differential equations. Tensor equations. Tensor differential equations, even. And equations with lots of those funny squiggly things that look like snakes standing up getting ready to strike. You know, these: ∫
➤ Volleying banter.
➤ Being too sexy for cats i don't actually have.
➤ Sneezing around your cat.
➤ Gasping for breath around dogs.
➤ Disarming you with my wit and charm.
➤ Playing tour guide.
➤ Not driving.
➤ Failing to perceive articles directly in front of me.
➤ Having that very-important-thing-you-asked-me-if-I-heard-and-I-said-yes go in one ear and right out the other.
➤ Storing and retrieving lots and lots of math/science/language trivia. This capacity actually turns out to be useful on occasion.
➤ Laughing at new-agers when they tell me all about quantum physics.
➤ Refraining from commiting homicide whenever I hear Deepak Chopra or What the BLEEP?! cited as physics authorities. Actually I lied. I'm not very good at this, at all. In fact, it's very, very hard for me. But do I give it my best try, anyway.
➤ Pointing and laughing at the ones freaking out over the sinister implications of contrails.
➤ Extemporaneously breaking down and explaining complex ideas in physics, math, electrical engineering, and computer science in ways that just about anybody can understand, without sacrificing too much rigor. (Unless you're my mom, and it has anything to do with computers or electronics). My physics teacher was pretty good at that, too.
➤ Caring about people.
➤ Letting you know what I really think and feel.
➤ Being a good host to my house guests.
➤ Using words as playthings, and other forms of recreational linguistics.
➤ Creating new lost articles.
➤ Nurturing clutter.
➤ Putting random phrases next to these arrowhead thingies.
➤ Freaking out when packing for a trip.
➤ Seeing so many different ways to categorize a collection that it becomes difficult to pick an organizing principle and stick with it.
➤ Alphabetizing lists. (Actually, I really suck at that, and I have a note from my doctor to prove it. I just thought it would be funny placed in some arbitrary spot here in this clearly unalphabetized jumble.)
➤ Instantly destroying any semblance of order in my surroundings without ever being aware that is what is happening.
➤ Not smoking.
➤ Not taking drugs.
➤ Not drinking.
➤ Drinking coffee.
➤ Not sleeping.
➤ Repeating myself.
➤ Annoying, inordinate, inconvenient horniness.
➤ Disarming you with my wit and charm.
➤ Not getting laid.
➤ Saying the same thing in different ways.
➤ Parsimony of language.
➤ Growing just a tiny little bit more each day into the person I truly want to be.
➤ Making metaphorical lemonade.
➤ Repeating myself.
➤ Mentioning with annoying frequency that Feynman taught me physics.
I also have been told a number of times that my eyes are very attractive.
One of my most prized possessions is the autographed copy of the first volume of The Feynman Lectures on Physics which I used in two semesters of weekly continuing education classes sponsored in-house by my then employer, and taught personally by none other than Professor Richard P. Feynman himself.
After class each week, Feynman and I used to stroll a half-mile together to the bus stop where I caught my bus home, and he waited there with me for his own ride to come pick him up. Due to this accident of circumstance we struck up something of a small friendship, and almost every Wednesday night we enjoyed 45 minute chats spanning an expansive array of subjects. I have never stopped being grateful for this unique and rare gift which Fate's caprice chose to bestow upon me
There's a pretty good physics joke at the very end of my profile.
As to other books:
I've been struggling with some of the more advanced mathematics in Sir Roger Penrose's The Road to Reality: A Complete Guide to the Laws of the Universe for quite some while now, and each time my mind grasps a new idea it gives me tremendous pleasure. I would love to share, study, and discuss this book with you.
My very favorite literary writing is found in a novel called Winter's Tale by Mark Helprin. Helprin's descriptions are so sensually vivid that even now as I sit in my home on tropical Maui, I can taste and feel the ozone-sharpend crisp winter winds and hear the crackly crunch of men treading on virgin snow, though I last read this book some 20 years ago. I'm looking forward to the movie set scheduled for release next Valentines Day. [That turned out to be a huge disappointment. I can't believe they made such a mediocre film from such a great book.]
Some of my other favorite books are: Centering and the Art of Intimacy and Conscious Loving, both by the husband-and-wife Ph.D. psychologist team of Drs. Gay Hendricks and Kathlyn Hendricks; Shakti Gawain's Creative Visualization, which helped me discover that I wanted to relocate to Maui and taught me how to manifest the home in which I now live; The Richest Man in Babylon by George S. Clason; How to Meditate: A Guide to Self-Discovery by Lawrence LeShan; Kundalini Yoga for Body, Mind, and, Beyond by Ravi Singh; Fundamental Algorithms and Semi-Numerical Algorithms by Donald E. Knuth. (Yes, I am a geeknerdork.)
Hawaiiana: Nana i ke Kumu ("Look to the Source") - a work about Hawaiian culture, traditions, and language, intended to explain these things to clinical practitioners, and E Kama'ili Hawai'i Kakou ("Let's Speak Hawaiian"). OKC doesn't let me write these names properly, as it won't render the 'okina and the kahako-marked vowels used in correctly writing 'Olelo Hawai'i (Hawaiian language).
I have other favorites including one that are too private to be mentioned here.
I passionately enjoy many genres of music... British invasion, 60s rock, psychedelic movement, classic rock, punk, new wave, what used to be called alternative, 80s garage bands, surf sound, and own around 2000 CDs. (Yeah, I'm old school that way and I've even got some vinyl lying around.) Nonetheless I would be perfectly content were I were forced to spend the rest of my life listening to nothing but the Cocteau Twins.
On second thought, that would be torture without some Clash and Eno for balance.
Still, I will try to list particular favorites as they come to me:
Abba (Hey, I've been to Sweden, what can I tell ya?); The Allman Brothers Band; The Beatles; George Benson; David Bowie: Heroes; The Clash; Cocteau Twins; Depeche Mode; Bob Dylan; Echo and the Bunnymen; Brian Eno: Taking Tiger Mountain by Strategy, Before and after Science; The Grateful Dead; Jefferson Airplane; Jimi Hendrix; Jorma Kaukonen; Joy Division; Kraftwerk: Neonlicht; Richard Lloyd; New Order; The Rolling Stones; 10,000 Maniacs; Television: Marquee Moon; The Who; X; The Zombies
I actually don't own a TV, but there a number of things I watch via the internet from time to time. Basically, I like comedy, documentaries, science and nature shows, shows about history, science fiction (more properly, science fantasy; stories violating the laws of nature in obvious ways tend to irritate me), detective mysteries and news and current events programs - the kinds of things on PBS, The Comedy Channel and the SyFy Channel.
Favorite shows: BattleStar Galactica (Reimagined), Caprica,the entire Star Trek franchise except the last one, V (reimagined(The X-Files, The Daily Show,,South Park, The Simpsons, Futurama, and most Britcoms especially Monty Python's Flying Circus>/i>, Keeping Up Appearances, and As Time Goes By. I'm also a fan of detective shows such as the CSI franchise (and am still in mourning over th the passing of CSI Miami) and the Detective Lindley Mysteries. I loved the old cult favorite The Prisoner\er, with Patrick McGoohan. I never got into Doctor Who and I know that I really should.
There are two made for TV Sci-Fi mini-serieses that I think are among the best Sci-Fi ever made: Taken and The Battlestar Galactica (reimagined)
I don't go often enough, and I don't like renting. Most of this list is really old.
Classic favorites: THX1138, original Star Wars, Hitchcock's The Birds, Friends (1971), Them (giant ants with a taste for manflesh lurking in the sewer that is... I mean, the sewers under L.A.), Slacker
Cult Classics: The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Harold & Maude.
Favorites of the past few years (desperately needs updating!): Interstellar, Aeon Flux, The Constant Gardiner, Blood Diamond, US vs John Lennon, Venus, I Heart Huckabees, Cave of the Yellow Dog, The Producers, Memoirs of a Geisha, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Motorcycle Diaries. (That is so stale.)
Oh, look! An update:
➤ Interstellar kicked ass.
Most dreamily erotic love scene of all time: Flourescent cave scene in Gas, Food & Lodging, an otherwise completely tedious film.
Worst picture ever: Frogs. I'd challange you to a turkey shoot, but I'm not sure I'd survive another sitting.
I was both blessed and cursed with a mother who is a phenomenal cook. Nothing else on earth or in heaven quite measures up to Mom's arroz con gondules.
Having said that, I enjoy a wide variety of world cuisines, and I like to try new and exotic foods.
I also make a mean ginger/brown sugar/mixed berries pancake syrup. (Ginger is definitely my favorite flavor.) Mmmm. Yummy!
I like snorkeling. A lot. OK, I know it's not a book, movie, music or food, but it is way better that all those things combined. At least I think so. For me it is exercise, meditation, and wonder all rolled into one.
2: the intimate window into the nature of reality provided by a facile command of the methodology and tools of science and math
3: music, and other fine arts
4: the beautiful Hawai‘i archipelago, where I make my home
5: copious quantities of delicious beverages infused with concentrations of 3,7-dihydro-1,3,7-trimethyl-1H-purine-2,6-dione sufficient to sustain life as we know it
6: (this space reserved for future expansion.)
The sheer improbability that this particular collection of field excitation quanta, each having made its own 13.8 billion year journey across the vastness of space time from the beginning of all that is to here and now over so very many different paths, should have found each other and organize themselves into an assembly capable of contemplating that wonder with transcendent gratitude.
When will I again be loved by a woman who makes my heart explode with joy and gratitude each and every time I am merely reminded of her existence?
Why 80% of the matches OKC thinks should be highly compatible with me are bisexual women less than half my age.
What percentage of them would agree with the matching algorithm's assessment.
Would "who" or "whom" have been correct three sentences above?
The deep meaning of the double slit experiment:
I've also been thinking a lot about dark energy and dark matter, what implications they have for our understanding of the cosmos.:Science has been in this place so many times before, thinking that we were just about to put a a pretty ribbon on a things and say we understood how everything works.
Just a few years ago it was thought that "all" we had to do now would be to unify general relativity with the standard model of particle physics, and it would be a wrap, but now we have substantial evidence that we can only see about 5% of all we there is in the observable universe and most of the rest is a complete mystery. There isn't much consensus on the parts which could be explained with the physics we do understand, and I'm excited at the prospect we could be on the verge of physics as profound as the one that ushered in relativity and quantum theory.
What exactly did happen in that first 10^-36 seconds?
Life & Death & Love & Sex.
Mystery & Gratitude.
If there is a God or gods, what a phenomenally effein' great idea he/she/it/they had in creating women. (Yes, I'm agnostic, but I don't think about all that much.)
The nature of consciousness, and how to whip up a batch in the kitchen.
What makes me tick.
My part in things.
How I may be of service.
The miracle of language, and how truly mindblowing it is that we can share our thoughts with each other.
How the universe works.
The glass being twice as big as it needs to be.
The beauty of it all.
If I find you attractive, you'll likely experience a growing sense that there's someting really weird or maybe even a little creepy about my body language. I will be attentive, interested, and engaged, but my body language will seem to signal disinterest, aloofness, rejection, or even the desire to get away.
What's going on is this: I'm feeling attracted to you, and I want to communicate that attraction by means of appropriate touch. Unless you have signaled clear permission for me to use demonstrative touch (and it has also registered with me, because sometimes I miss these signals), my desire to communicate interest through touch feels to me like I want to do something very, very wrong and harmful to you. As you might imagine this is very confusing and uncomfortable for me.
This is actually a great "tell" for you, because the weirder my body language feels to you, the more I want to use touch to communicate interest, and the more and more conflicted I feel.
If the interest is mutual, there's a couple of things you can do to help me. Probably the simplest thing would be to signal permission by touching me on the hand, arms or anywhere else that feels natural and appropriate to you in a way that makes it obvious that it was not accidental. Another thing that works is simply asking me what's going on.
My body language will become congruent after the permission signal has registered, and my use of communicative touch will be appropriate and normal for a while.
The next time my body language goes weird again it is your tell that I want to kiss you, and I am i need of a permission signal to proceed across the boundary between purely demonstrative touch and touch imbued with a sexual dimension.
So if you're wondeering why I don't kiss you already, it's probably because I'm wanting to do so, but I'm color-blind and didn't see the light change from red to green.
I'm happy for the opportunity to explain this, as it's pretty awkward to make this disclosure this between the beginning of a first meeting and the time my body language starts to get affected.
I have piqued your interest.
You like the physics joke below.
You have ever sent a link to this cartoon when what you really wanted to do is called homicide.
You are an übergeekette.
You so desire.
I won't see it if you "like" my profile or click on the star button in Quickmatch. Feel free to message me if you wish.
If you would like to have an extended conversation with me, I would like to move to using the telephone just as soon as you are comfortable with that idea; The length of this profile belies the fact that I am a two-finger typist.
And now, a physics nerd Joke:
Richard Feynman, Erwin Schrödinger, and Werrner Heisenberg set off on a cross-country road trip. Feynman is at the wheel with Heisenberg navigating, head buried in a map, when the police signal them to pull over.
An officer approaches and asks: "Do you know why I stopped you?", to which Feynman replies "Well, officer, I know it wasn't for speeding because I've been observing very carefully, and my measurements tell me that I've been going exactly the speed limit plus or minus..." at which point Heisenberg elbows Feynman sharply and says, "Dick, don't let me hear that, or we'll be hopelessly lost!"
The officer senses he is dealing with eccentrics, so he pays little mind to this strange remark: "No, you haven't been speeding, but I've been following you for a while and you keep weaving back and forth. You're all over the road and you're not staying in your lane." Feynman replies: "Of course I'm all over the road! How else am I supposed to get from point A to point B except by taking every possible path in between? And you say I wasn't staying in my lane: Which lane wasn't I staying in, and how can you say with such certainty that I wasn't there if you didn't see me not there?"
By this time the officer has had enough and says: "That's it! I don't know what you guys are on, but I'm gonna search the car, and if I find anything, I'm taking you all in." With that, he opens the trunk and says, "You're all under arrest!" When they protest that they've done nothing wrong the officer replies: "You can't tell me you didn't know there was a dead cat in your trunk!", to which Schrödinger replies, "Not until now."