29Panama City, United States
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
My self-summary
An update for the curious(if you exist): I made this profile about three years ago. Most people would message me with a "hi. how are you?" or some variant there of, even though I had expressly forbade that. I had also received some creepers that seemed frustrated with me for not fitting into their preconceived mold of how women should respond to their advances on this site.

Two people managed to actually start and hold conversations with me. I was impressed(I get bored easily) and interested, but one asked me out on a date first. The plan for that date had been to go see a movie together with some munchies perhaps thrown in. Low-key just the way I preferred my first dates to be. What happened is I was three hours late to that date due to unforeseen circumstances and conceded to go over to his place for a movie on the couch(I was living dangerously).

What happened was an eight hour long conversation about pretty much everything that crossed our minds. He didn't make a move on me. It got to the point where I wondered if I had been quickly shuffled into the friendzone once he'd had the chance to see me in person. It wasn't until five in the morning that we got to the point of kissing and then promptly fell asleep as he only had a couple of hours before work.

The next date was slightly less talking and a good bit more physical (and food and a movie). When he finally asked me to be his girlfriend, it took me two weeks to respond. I don't like to make important decisions quickly. A year later he proposed, and a year after that we were married. We still have those long conversations though.

Back to our regularly scheduled programming:
Hmm after thinking I've decided honesty is the best policy on this. Also in not censoring my thoughts my writing is going to be a bit.. mmm wibbly-wobbly in its reasoning, so please bear with me.

I have had a total of 22 friends my entire life. I've moved 10 times. I was teased since first grade and any attempt I have ever made to be more pleasing to my peers has blown up in my face. My family generally only have something bad to say to me and if they ever have anything good to say it is always coupled with a 'but'. I've fallen in love once and that too was an unmitigated disaster. I spent a good deal of my life depressed and rather suicidal. At the moment, I have no clue what direction I should take my life in as my definition of success is utterly attainable(in fact I just met it today and yesterday and the day before that) and not at all materialistic in the slightest. Being that I was (do underline 'was' like a bajillion times in your mind) just drowning in depression, I'm not at all in the habit of hoping. I'm very realistic, in my opinion.

As a child, I was the quiet girl in the back of the classroom that everyone found a little weird. When I spoke it was to ask a question. I was and am still a very curious girlie. I was a very philosophical child and spent all of my time wondering about absolutely everything. And, I learned very quickly that no one likes an inquisitive child unless they want to grow up and be a rocket scientest or a doctor or something. All I ever wanted to do was figure out the whys of people and I did. I believe it's what makes me a great writer.

In middle school, I kind of.. snapped. I was tired of being seen as the nice pushover just because I preferred to keep to myself. When I did defend myself I was suddenly a crazy bitch in everyone's eyes. So around 12-13 years old that's what I became. I revelled in the oddness that was me and made sure that each word I gave my peers was scathing. It's become something of a defense mechanism over the years.

I can't tolerate fools. I just can't. I don't like the feel of my brain bleeding after awhile.

I'm actually a pretty nice person, when someone gets to know me. I have and will continue to do everything in my power to help those I care for. Even though my mom is more concerned about my appearance than my actual happiness, I still love her. I love taking care of kids and the kind of sappy romance stories where two friends realize they've been in love with each other all along. I like holding hands.

Honesty is probably not the best policy on sites like this. The point is to sell yourself like a product and make yourself out to be the best person that you are. I can't do that. There are many good points about me, but hell if I can name them without sounding like an idiot. So you get the worst of me instead.
What I’m doing with my life
considering going back to college (to major in something...) lol and trying to make enough money so that when I do go to college I can afford the little things... like gas and food.. and clothes ...yeah
I’m really good at
Stories... and that's about it lol. I love to do many things, but my life kind of revolves around writing and reading and little else.
The first things people usually notice about me
I'm quiet.

Until I open my mouth.. then they notice that I am an odd girlie.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I'll read most genres except mysteries, westerns, horror, and biographies(of course there have been exceptions).

My all-time favorite books are:
White As Snow by Tanith Lee
The Princess Bride by William Goldman
The Forbidden Game Trilogy by L.J. Smith
Rose Daughter by Robin McKinley
The Reluctant God by Pamela F. Service

I also <3 Shakespeare but I prefer to see plays instead of read them

My favorite movie is Labyrinth because I can watch it often after almost two decades and for more than nostalgic reasons. My second favorite is Sympathy For Lady Vengeance. It's a korean thriller type movie and it's made of AWESOME.

I like to watch practically every type of movie. Even the bad ones are worth mocking. However I hate zombies, love zombie movies, but hate zombies... so very very very much.

The music I listen to depends on my mood, but I'm not into classic rock or Jpop.
Six things I could never do without
Books, clean underwear, chocolate, imagination, music, and a pencil.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Stories... and characters... and (of course) my future... but that's boring.. and depressing most days.. I also daydream about saving the world or a different world or living in a post-apocalyptic future...
On a typical Friday night I am

most of my fun stuff gets done on Saturday and Friday is for being lazy after my long week of work
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I have a long-standing, mad crush on the many anthropomorphic representations of Death.

I always have a song(or more) stuck in my head... always... always. Seriously any time of day.. even when I first wake up ..forever and ever.
You should message me if
you actually have something to say. If you say hi and ask me how I am, I will rarely bother to message back.
The two of us