I know what kind of person I'd like to be, but I have no fucking clue how others see me. Hopefully as dashingly handsome, polite, caring, independent, talented, intelligent... maybe with a sort of sexy confident swagger. A sweetheart with a devil may care presentation. I guess I could also be a total fucking jerkface and have no idea... my experience is that most jerkfaces are completely oblivious to the fact.
Here's what I guess I like to think about myself:
*Charismatic introvert- I crave social interaction and intimate attention but I need alone time to recharge my batteries
*Feminist... and constantly working at it. I think feminism benefits everyone. I'd love to see a world where women are honored and treated with respect, where trans people are not alienated, and where sex workers are not shamed. I'd like a world in which both men and women are not constantly told that they are weak for having and sharing difficult emotions. I want to support other men and be vulnerable with them instead of feeling threatened and drawn into competiton. I want the patriarchy to fall and along with it hetero normative social constructs and gender binary thinking... that's all.
*Outdoorsy- I teach traditional skills and indigenous technology. This does not mean that I live like a hermit in a debris hut in the woods. I just go to visit one sometimes. I make a lot of my own gear, I can track animals using bird language,and I am the best person to have on your zombie survival team ever.
*Queer- This is complicated because I don't present as queer. I present as very hetero masculine. I like the people that I like regardless of gender or lack thereof. I find myself mostly dating women and other queer/gender queer folk because a lot of cis men are terrible... see above "feminist".
*Poly- I identify as polyamorous. This phrase is defined differently by different people. For me this means connecting both emotionally and physically with more than one person. I am an ethical non-monogamist. I believe in honest, open, sometimes vulnerable communication. This part of my life is a constant work in progress, I still have monogamous socialization and I am still a human with difficult feelings. Deal with it.
*Sex positive- I love sex, and I whole heartedly believe that we as a culture have stigmatized it in a way that is unhealthy. I am open about sex, I physically engage with most of my friends, not always in the form of sex, but I like sharing intimacy. This does not mean that the only thing I want from you is sex. Believe me when I say I'm a lot more complicated than that.
Learning how to stay health focused. I like to climb, bike, run but not all the time. I'm trying to eat healthier foods... but not less delicious ones.
Sometimes asking for the things I want.... and other times not.
Finding things someone else lost... but still not my fucking coffee.
Most physical things... yes including that one... basically anything I can touch I can learn to do well. I think it comes from having to learn instruments by ear.
Cuddling while watching movies or reading books.
Plus I can start a fire by rubbing two sticks together... so I've got that going for me.
Movies: Impossible to name them all but the things that come to mind are... Anything by Hayao Miyazaki, Tim Burton previous to Planet of the Apes with the exception of Sweeney Todd, Guillermo Del Toro, Quentin Tarantino, Ghostbusters, The Fountain, Watchmen, Being There, 24 Hour Party People, The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnasus... MST3K!
Shows: Cosmos (I love you Carl Sagan), Planet Earth, Archer, Bobs Burgers, FUTURAMA! Cowboy Bebop, Metalocalypse, Adventure Time!, American Horror Story, Homeland, Blacklist, Sherlock, X-Files
Authors/Books: Douglas Adams, Rumi, David Sedaris, Tom Robbins, Orson Scott Card, Neil Gaiman, Terry Pratchett, Tolkien, Carl Sagan
A quiet place
What kind of person I will become.
What I would like to learn.
If anybody even reads this crap or if they just see a picture and swipe left.
Social dynamics and why it seems that sometimes I completely understand what's happening when no one else does... and am totally clueless when everyone else seems to be on the same page.
I don't know... probably watching some god awful movie on Netflix pretending that I want to be doing something different but really just wanting someone to come over and watch a god awful movie with me... and make out.