I have never had a girlfriend in any capacity in all my life(never had sex, never kissed, no type of date of any sort, never ANYTHING). I know that apparently the idea of a grown man who hasn't ever had a girlfriend seems to be a turnoff to the majority of women on this site but I feel that this is an important thing for me to mention in my profile.
I have epilepsy and since I have a seizure about once a year I'm not allowed to drive in this state so naturally I don't know how to drive, I also have a bad arm so I'm disabled and unable to do the only type of work I could get around here so I don't have a job and I live with my dad.
I just had to be honest about all of that upfront, I know that that a jobless loser that doesn't know how to drive who lives with his dad has got to be a major dealbreaker for most women but I just felt I had to mention it here in my profile as well.
For more about me you should read my answers to the questions I've answered on here, they summarize me better than this, I warn you though that if your are offended by profanity I use the word fuck a LOT in the explanations.
Some people have told me that I shouldn't mention all this stuff in my profile but this is me, this is who I am and I'm not going to lie about myself, I hate empty profiles and I want to be as detailed as possible.
Attempting to write even though I can never get started on anything even though I can come up with several plots.
Almost everyone who has heard me sing says that I can sing well though.
Stephen King, Garrison Keillor, Alan Moore, Grant Morrison, Neil Gaiman, Clive Barker, J.R.R Tolkien, Nick Cave, Dave Sim, Jack Kerouac, William S. Burroughs, Jeff Lindsay, Aleister Crowley, C.S Lewis(I know that's a very weird juxtaposition), Roald Dahl, Dennis Lehane, Cormac McCarthy, Alice Sebold, Audrey Niffenegger, Larry McMurtry, H.P Lovecraft, John Ajvide Lindqvist, Michael Crichton, Seth Grahame-Smith, Hunter S. Thompson, Mick Foley.
The Big Lebowski, The Shawshank Redemption, The Good, The Bad and The Ugly, JFK, The Dark Knight, Spirited Away, The Shining, Goodfellas, Fargo, Magnolia, Blue Velvet,A Clockwork Orange, Nosferatu(1979 version), There Will Be Blood, Young Frankenstein, Fear and Loathing In Las Vegas, Akira.
I am a bad movie connoisseur obsessed with Troll 2, Ed Wood movies, Roger Corman movies(although many of his aren't technically bad per se), Uwe Boll movies(we are few and far between, VERY few) and Asylum movies although I must be the only lover of bad movies in the world that hates Mystery Science Theater(I don't need three jackasses cracking terrible hipster jokes to tell me why it's funny).
Back on the subject of good movies my favorite directors include Werner Herzog, The Coen Brothers, David Lynch, Akira Kurosawa, Robert Altman, Clint Eastwood, Terry Gilliam and Hayo Miyazaki .
Six Feet Under, The Simpsons, Seinfeld, Dexter, Breaking Bad, My Name Is Earl, Smallville, Spongebob Squarepants, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Twin Peaks, Lost, King of The Hill, Beavis and Butt-Head, Lucky Louie, Louie, Raising Hope, Married With Children, The Ren & Stimpy Show, Bored To Death, Prison Break, Sherlock.
I watch a LOT of TV and mostly shows that aren't even on anymore.
My favorite genres are folk, alt country, industrial, film scores and neofolk.
I hate most hip hop/rap, most types of metal(symphonic and folk metal is decent though) and the grand majority of modern mainstream country(mainstream country in general in fact).
My favorite bands and singers are: The Rolling Stones, Led Zeppelin, Bob Dylan, Within Temptation, Nick Cave and The Bad Seeds, Tom Waits, The Doors, Bruce Springsteen, Marilyn Manson, Pink Floyd, Johnny Cash, The White Stripes, Wolfmother, Sigur Ros, Hank Williams III .
Current 93 and Coil are the two greatest bands you've likely never heard of.
Food: Japanese, Mexican, Italian, English(English food is HIGHLY underrated).
Cats(A straight guy who loves cats, what a shock huh?)
If you're childfree for life.
If you're liberal or at the very least apathetic or left leaning centrist.
If by some chance you like something you've read here.
I'd prefer it if you were a little older than me.