Let me start again and let me make this more about who I truly am when I go to bed. I am the daughter of a musician and my mother is an artist and jewelry maker. At the early age of 11 my parents got divorced. I went to live with my grandmother. Grandma Georgia had been a widow since my grandpa Alva died on April 21st, 1982. She was never with another man and lived alone. I spent so much time believing there was love in the world.
My boyfriend was murdered in the October 28th, 1991 while I was in Peoria at the Metallica Black album concert. It would take a long time before I was ever able to attend a Metallica show again. Next time I saw them it was the year 2000 at the Summer Sanitarium tour.
My grandma was my everything. I lived with her until she died on Easter Sunday of 2001.
I took a job on the OZZFest in 2001 and I was off on the first tour I would ever work. My life consisted of going from being rich to being broke overnight as I never inherited any money when grandma died. I had been a bit of a bad girl in the eyes of my family. In many ways I was! Admittedly! I was the girl that drank alcohol, smoked cigarettes, and never committed to a schedule. I could never keep a boyfriend. I was the girl they talked about and spread rumors about. I am the girl that never gave a shit what they said. After getting kicked out of my dad's house I relocated to Clearwater FL. But that never lasted long because dad began to have issues in Illinois and I went home. I stayed there for almost 10 years while I was a parent to my son.
I moved back to Los Angeles in 2010 when my son turned 13, and I have now as of June 13th 2016 I have been here 5 years and never went back to Illinois.
I am only left with the scars of the people I knew that hurt me and those I thought would understand me. I have only met one person I thought might understand on here. He and I do not speak any longer. It is as if we do not know each other. In a room there is always room for the two of us. I think I need friends before I need anything else.
March 27th 2015 my son's father was murdered in a triple homicide in St Louis. The saying everyone goes away hits home. I know not to grow attached to anyone
If you think you will get me out, Here I sit in isolation in my apartment. I am a photographer and I need to get back to my taking photos.
Thank You for listening. I want to write a book about my life as it has been crazy.
I was working on a degree in Journalism and Mass Communication with a Minor in Health Care Administration. I was planning for the future and it is time to see the world. My son will be 18 next year. It is time I get to living because at 41 I should appreciate life more.
I am a rock journalist. I write about music as it completes me and there are a lot of worthy bands on the scene. I got tired of not using my gifts that I have been given. I am learning so much. When I walk in a room things seem to come together. The people I need to have in my life are coming in like destiny. There are things that I desire. If you are in my head and it is a open book to you, read it then. Read me like a book. If you ask me questions and I do not answer you, then that means I do not trust you. There are people in my life that I trust. I think about the decisions I make and I think about the impact on others. A lot of what I do is not totally self driven.
If you want a relationship with me and I am not ready for that sort of a relationship then please respect me. I am about to experiment with my sexuality and my mind in many ways. I am learning how to be vocal in my needs and desires.
So, like I said earlier; if you cannot form a sentence when you communicate with me and hold intelligent conversation, please do not bother.
I want steak dinner! I want breakfast in bed! How does that work for ya? I like strawberries and chocolate. I spend more time doing homework than I do anything. At least put forth an effort to thrill me. I like extravagant gifts.
My Grandma as my Spirit Guide.
A good day at the movies