OK, so it was ten inches long, sitting in a bucket, and I maybe (definitely) deserved it for sticking my hand in its plastic home. There's a universe out there where this ends painfully in an Egyptian hospital, but in this one I got nothing more than a barely visible scar.
I like to think of it as the world teaching me that my stupid decisions don't have to have consequences. That and the value of the occasional lie of omission in storytelling.
The rest of the time, an only slightly cliché combination of: rock climbing, computer programming, open-container law flouting, cabeza taco eating, and mid-20s existential crisising.
Favorite bag of jolly ranchers in aural form: BØRNS Dopamine.
Favorite movie that I maybe kinda originally thought was about superheroes: Birdman
Favorite cuisine from a country not colonized by Europe: Ethiopian
Favorite book that my 14 year old self definitely did not understand as well as he thought he did: Lolita
Favorite book that my now self still doesn't understand as well as he thinks he does: Kafka on the shore
Favorite childhood comfort food that sounds bizarre when translated into English: Split pigeon pea stew over rice
Temperature lows above freezing
That internet thing the kids love so much
Running out of things to list before hitting quota
How to quote someone who wrongly used "[sic]".
Why some people choose to wear socks in situations where it's permissible not to.
What Lil Jon *would* turn down for.