39 York Harbor, United States
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My self-summary
I moved to southern Maine from Boston a few years ago for a quieter, simpler life. What a great idea that was. As much as I loved my city life and sometimes crave it still, I was pretty okay with exchanging sirens, city driving, uphill-downhill parallel parking, and the rumble of the T for a lovely, quiet little spot by the Atlantic Ocean.

I grew up at the edge of the woods in western Massachusetts and at a beautiful, quiet home in the White Mountains and am no stranger to living close to the earth, but what a special thing to live by the sea. For sure, the beauty of this place inspires my creative, sensual inclinations, desire to breathe deeply, entertain company oceanside, and regularly take in new adventures outside. While I really am happy to enjoy all of these fine things alone, and I engage solitude as a high priority, how many moments aren't made that much sweeter with the company of a kind partner? Perhaps you are a smart, charming, down-to-earth man I'd love to meet. I hope so.

I live an intentional, disciplined life and am naturally kind and generous, empathetic and forgiving, observant, attentive, light-hearted, gregarious and yet quite private, strong, creative, and dedicated to my passions and to people. I am a writer and educator, a reader with a general academic bent although a pretty serious disinterest in pretense. I seek abundance in simplicity and minimalism, grace, friendship, and natural beauty, and am humbled every day by small moments, many of them outside.

While the thought of a new companion often sounds pretty great to me--and something classy, smart, respectful, sensual, fun--I'm not remotely interested in rushing into anything but so much more interested in finding beauty in the unexpected and in simply meeting good people. That said, I am fully open to the possibility that you and I might just fall wildly in love and stay with one another for a while--possibly, even, forever. I'd love that.

Some music for continuing on? Yeah, I think so. This is lovely and might make you tear up a little. Seriously. Lovely:
What I’m doing with my life
Practicing mindfulness, feeling challenged, inspired and surprised by my work, exploring Maine, writing, reading, playing my piano, gardening, entertaining, enjoying the Atlantic Ocean in my back yard, taking in early mornings with meditation, exercise, tea, coffee, good literature, quiet; bathing simply and luxuriously with high quality shea butter soap (let's go with French shea butter soap with verbena--you won't ever regret that).
I’m really good at
being creative, meeting challenge with equanimity, expressing gratitude, living in the moment, creating comfortable living and thinking spaces, being a trustworthy friend, making really good food. I'm pretty sure it's a good practice to romance yourself every day--I do that pretty well.
The first things people usually notice about me
Probably my easy smile, expressive face, then maybe my white hair and short haircut, good posture, and authenticity as a kind, gracious, empathetic listener.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Too many to list--but-

Books/Reading Material:

Pilgrim at Tinker Creek (Annie Dillard), anything Terry Tempest Williams, Mary Oliver, Emily Dickinson, Robert Hass, Louise Gluck, Marianne Moore, Seamus Heaney, Jim Harrison, Galway Kinnell, Robert Frost. Food and Healing (Annemarie Colbin). The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali. I subscribe to and read The New York Times, The New Yorker, and Orion Magazine.

On my current reading list:

Poet on Demand: The Life, Letters and Works of Celia Thaxter (Jane E. Vallier); Consolations: The Solace, Nourishment and Underlying Meaning of Everyday Words (David Whyte) and Whyte's poetry; Life Work (Donald Hall); Citizen: An American Lyric (Claudia Rankine); The Spell of the Sensuous: Perception and Language in a More-Than-Human-World (David Abram)


Jeffrey Foucault, Gregory Alan Isakov, Martin Sexton, Ray Lamontagne, Kris Delmhorst, Peter Mulvey, Frazey Ford, Jolie Holland, Carsie Blanton, Gillian Welch, Carrie Elkin, Caroline Herring, Billie Holiday, Ella Fitzgerald, Etta James, Cecile McLorin Salvant, Cyrille Aimee, Madeleine Peyroux, Stacey Kent, Melody Gardot, Chet Baker, Krishna Das, Jai Uttal, Haydn cello concertos, classical and jazz piano.

Movies and TV:

I don't keep a TV in my home although I do really love a good film on occasion.


lots of juicing with lots of ginger, salads with local, organic greens, avocados and guacamole, summer tomatoes, kale, golden beets, pea shoots, wild berries, pomegranate, South River Miso (dandelion leek is pretty special if you can find it), sea vegetables, shelling peas, raw honey, good loose-leaf tea (kukicha, genmaicha, rooibos, sometimes Assam or lapsang souchong for the smoky warmth), good Ethiopian coffee, occasional raw goat and sheep cheeses (let's go for Abbaye de Belloc or Idiazabal to start), chevre, castelvetrano and cerignola olives, Pinot noir, Sauvignon blanc, chardonnay, a good strong amaro, G&T in summer (high quality gin & tonic), Maine lobster, mussels, clams. Above all, I have always believed that eating is about pleasure and nourishment on many levels and deeply enjoy the simple, sensual pleasures so often experienced with good, simple whole food and good company.
The six things I could never do without
Friends and family, mountains, ocean, good literature, kindness, quiet. The best things in life are not things.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
the art of balancing strong solitude with a strong social life (and, for me, the importance of each as an essential partner for the other), people I love, a party I'd love to host or one I'm planning (small, comfortable, low-key, low-lit, with abundant wine, good food, conviviality, connectedness, jazz), how to best engage a healing conversation, cultivating a warm home, books and articles I'm reading or have read, gardening projects (here or elsewhere), how to channel grace, books I might write and words I love (like "hummock" or "gomphrena" or "root cellar"), my next long walk, the possibility of a return to doctoral work (this will require more thought), my next vacation. I often dream of building a small writing cabin somewhere remote. And while I don't wish to own much, I do imagine, so frequently in my daydreams, someday owning a big, beautiful claw foot tub.
On a typical Friday night I am
At home with tea and/or wine and a good book, possibly entertaining, writing, out with friends, sometimes on the road to visit family and/or friends--any or all following a long walk or run along the water or another favorite path.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
Plenty of secret single behaviors around here. Please ask me whatever you'd like when you meet me.
You should message me if
it would bring you pleasure.

you enjoy smart, respectful conversation, mountains and sea air, have a few passions going on and some good stories to tell, have a rich life of the mind, live deliberately, attend to friendships with great interest and sincerity, love deeply and with abandon, are happy (which means you've sometimes also felt life long for you more than you long for it), listen well, are bold and awake, open-minded, affectionate, humbled by the natural world, are gentle, sensual, athletic, masculine, self-sufficient, find strength in your own vulnerability, have an easy smile and a lot of class, might make me laugh, and are, above all, kind.

you're a sweetheart and just keep getting better and better.

you're a voracious reader, want to talk about what you're reading or you want to read a great book together and talk about it. Or maybe you'd like to share writing. While not essential, I do adore a man who knows how to write a proper letter and enjoys the letter form--and epistolary etiquette--as a purposeful art. You love language, bottom line, and know how to turn a phrase.

you make a habit of being outside more often than not and would like to go for a hike or walk somewhere beautiful, on slow time, together.

you now simply cannot help yourself.

If you're equally rugged and refined we'd probably fit pretty well. It's especially appealing if you don't take yourself too seriously, and even more so if you're able to intuit something incredibly sexy from our shared pheromones and romance me with charm and a light heart. I love it when you're just you--sincere, confident, quick-witted, endearing--and are in for a good time.