23Cedar Rapids, United States
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My self-summary
My name is Sam, and welcome to Jackass. Recently moved to Cedar Rapids for a job. I hail from Milwaukee, or as the indians call it, Milawawkay, which means the Good Land. I just graduated from college and am slowly figuring out how to be a productive member of society. Is it bad that I can't name a single hobby I have? I feel like it is... Uhmmm I guess I can see myself scrapbooking at some point in my life. I also had everyone of the state quarters collected back when I was like 8, but then I spent them all on ice cream or something. Not really sure what to be looking for here, but seeing as how I don't know anyone here outside of work I'll take what I can get!
What I’m doing with my life
Working for the weekend
I’m really good at
cooking, making people laugh, not giving a fuck, having a movie quote for almost any occasion, figuring out peoples celebrity doppelgangers, making an ass out of myself, making 10 episodes in a row on Netflix seem like nothing.
The first things people usually notice about me
My complete and total inability to grow facial hair
Maybe my permanently rosy cheeks
Also my Stats teacher told me I looked like Adam from Workaholics on the first day of class...
If I let my hair grow out for too long, me and my mom have the same haircut....
The totally badass wolf t-shirt I am probably wearing.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Movies: Hot Rod, Anchorman, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Die Hard, Thats my Boy, Happy Gilmore, Rock of Ages, Lethal Weapon, Mad Max, Airplane, Caddyshack, Animal House, Gone in 60 seconds(or any nic cage movie for that matter), Anything with Clint Eastwood, The Bourne Identity, Austin Powers, Star Wars, Star Trek, T2, The Breakfast Club, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and anything with Tom Cruise

Book: Catcher in the Rye: its the only book where I have ever connected so well to the main character

Music: Led Zeppelin or Guns N' Roses are tied for my favorite band of all time (cool GnR not new crappy GnR...)  I have a weird love/hate relationship with country that I'm not going to get into right now. I also would like to mention I have a decent collection of vinyl that I am very proud of... I swear I'm not a hipster, even though I've been listening to mostly 88.9 lately radio wise

Shows: Workaholics, Always Sunny, The Simpsons, Firefly, Breaking Bad, Chuck, Seinfeld, Supernatural

I have MANY more favorite movies and shows and music but I don't think you ladies honestly care...
Six things I could never do without
food, water, shelter, my mom and dad's unprotected sex, air, and Led Zeppelin
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Time travel, it hurts my head trying to understand how it works but someday I will perfect it and use it to see Led Zeppelin perform live and also to cockblock Freddie Mercury so he doesn't get AIDS

Also rush hour traffic, climbing the corporate ladder, and the government's cover up of extraterrestrials

Whether or not jet fuel can melt steel beams.

Who would win in a fight between a grilled cheese sandwich and a taco

Starting an illicit operation bringing delicious wisconsin beers across the boarder
On a typical Friday night I am
listening to the kind of music she doesn't like (definitely not a T-Swift reference)

Dancing with myself

Spending time with dear friends, either cocktailing or solving mysteries with our talking dog

Ordering pizza and watching Ninja Turtles II

Watching Netflix or playing video games
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I might be drunk right now...
You should message me if
You have yet to drive in a 1988 Ford Ranger...

You are NOT actually an old bald dude trying to have your way with me.

You aren't two midgets in a trench coat.... Seriously, that is NOT happening again...

You wanna be my sugar momma.
The two of us