SamJay9
42 Boston, United States
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SamJay9
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My self-summary
"Heart is what drives us and determines our fate. I need mavericks, dissidents, adventurers, outsiders, and rebels -- people who ask questions, bend the rules and take risks. Nice people with common sense do not make interesting characters, they only make good former spouses."
-Isabel Allende

I'm always on the look out for the unique, the real, and the bizarre to create or experience. Accomplices welcome.

Relationships are journeys, not destinations. Some are world tours, others a trip to the corner convenience store. Some are expeditions to the highest mountaintops, spelunkages into the deepest caves, dare-devil trips over Niagra Falls in wooden barrels, others are scavenger hunts around the city. They are all different, all opportunities to learn, to grow, to discover sides of ourselves, to reinvent ourselves and find our karass in the world.

Hey! I'm looking for travel partners! I'm a radically honest relationship anarchist. I don't do conventional relationships, I got off the relationship escalator years ago and never looked back. I value mutual independence, committed long term mutual emotional involvement and desire-based living. Once basic physical needs are met, I throw out the drama and the worries and get on with having fun: deep, expansive, all-enveloping fun. "Play is the highest form of research" so says Albert Einstein.

I'm an ex expat. I've lived and worked in South Korea, Japan, Israel, Holland, and Australia. Tokyo, Melbourne, Phoenix, Bloomington and Chicago are all places I consider home. I've spent time in Mexico, Colombia, Brazil, China, Singapore and Malaysia. I've studied at Arizona State, Indiana University, UNC Chapel Hill, Duke, Yale and the University of Melbourne. I only use the Oxford comma when absolutely necessary, which is never.

I'm liked because I care about others, in the small and the large sense. I have fulfilling relationships. I'm financially and emotionally secure, but I was never more loved than when I was dropdead broke. It's why I'm not afraid to be broke again.

I'm newly relocated to Boston after five years in Australia. Looking to make some new, local, interesting friends to add to my global bouquet of intelligent, interesting and improvisational community. I grieve for the monetization of creativity and everything in this town. I'm going to remake a small piece of it from the best of every place I've been.

I'm addicted to "what happens next?" If I can predict it, it's boring. I can't stand having a lack of wonder about the world and about the next moment. I like people that can turn any boring situation into fun and have a naturally happy approach to life. I also like hard workers. :)
What I’m doing with my life
A former academic now working in the fintech space. My day job is to prevent the next GFC. If you don't hear about such, then I'm doing my job. I absolutely love my job, but only do a four day workweek on principle.

My passions are in the discovery and pursuit of other objectives and interests. I like to partner alongside passionate people, get involved with their missions, become part of their worlds and have them part of mine.

I'm casually taking up sewing so I can moonlight like Tom Ford lives, casually taking up sailing so I can ruminate like Ernest Hemingway and John F. Kennedy. I'm casually reading through my re-stocked library all the books I'm not actually going to read because Umberto Eco taught me that a library is for the books you've not read.
I’m really good at
Keeping my commitments. How boring? Well, makes more fun possible, I think!

Finding the upside. Flexible non-dogmatic thinking. Making it work, just like Tim Gunn.

Reminding myself that most things are outside of our control. Stop trying to control that shit. Black Swans will get you every time.

Gastrophilanthropist - In the right (social) contexts, I'm an excellent purveyor of the wants and desires of others.

Trying to do too much and then complaining about it.
The first things people usually notice about me
A Cheshire cat like smile that promises fun. Maybe some mischief.

How does that creepy dirty old bastard channel Serge Gainsbourg in this day and age?

I often and inexplicably get compared to: Hugh Laurie, Keifer Sutherland, Kenneth Branagh and Eddie Izzard. But Hugh Laurie most. I asked once, "why Hugh Laurie? What's with the ugly old British guys?" The consensus was: "You're arrogant and sophisticated." (psst: I'm neither!!)
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books by Paul Auster, Italo Calvino, Milan Kundera, Hunter S. Thompson, Philip K. Dick, Jon Ronson, Beat Generation authors William S. Burroughs and Jack Kerouac and South American authors: Jorge Luis Borges, Julio Cortazar, Adolfo Bioy-Casares, Gabriel Garcia Marquez, Isabel Allende... Always looking for more South American authors...

Movies: by Jim Jarmusch, Wes Anderson, Luis Bunuel, Pedro Almodovar, the Coen Brothers, David Lynch, Robert Rodriguez, Ang Lee, Tim Burton, Pixar and of course many other films, in particular old french films, with the best by Eric Rohmer.

Music: too broad! John Coltrane, Louis Armstrong, Billie Holliday, Bob Marley and Taj Mahal. Jazz and Blues and Salsa and Downtempo Electronica. Endless, just like it is for you too.
The six things I could never do without
1. The unpredictable and inexplicable.
2. The solitude of my own personal space.
3. Meeting new people and the conversations they spark.
4. Throwing people together to see what happens next.
5. A crazy new plan or project.
6. A centered, unwavering internal core of happiness.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Art and Literature! All kinds. Not my field, just an interest. Also heady lectures and the MIT Poverty Lab.

How can I host or get involved in small, meaningful ways in important, but fun, organizations.

The past, present and future of cities. Cities are magical. So full of promise. 50% of the world's population lives in cities, a purely human construct. By 2050, 70% of that growing population will live in cities. (Of course, I do like unplugged time in remote places).
On a typical Friday night I am
Chasing down an art opening and catching up with friends for drinks...
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
The 800+ questions I answered are pretty incriminating. They've also been answered in speed quiz style five years ago and may be out of date.

In my five years in Melbourne, I've picked up Shibari as a bit of a thing I do. It's like a form of dancing, or an extended close embrace. I'm always looking the right person to practice with.
You should message me if
You should message me if you think "coz yolo" is as good a reason as any other and is best used to explain why you were washing dishes and doing laundry on Friday at midnight. It's not original, in the 70s and 80s it was the same meaning as "Why not?"

You should message me if you are in the mood to discover a part of the world you've not yet seen.

You should message me if you don't take anything at face value.

You should message me if what others say isn't your business, and you think your business is getting your shit done and then getting onto fun shit asap.

You should message me if you have something unique to offer, something I can work with.

You should message me if you like Dan Savage and are good, giving and game.

You should message me if you are interested in making a friend. I may or may not be right for you, but if I'm not, maybe one of my friends is!
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