SandwichMonster
29 Sacramento, United States
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SandwichMonster
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My self-summary
Time to rewrite this profile... going to experiment and try to keep it short.

I value honesty and humor, probably more than most things. The good thing about honesty is it's such a broad word that you can make it apply to almost anything! Chances are if you're easily offended then you won't like me, as few things offend me and while I do have a filter, I don't often employ it.

So to reiterate, I really think we'll get along if you like to laugh and are generally an honest person (Yes, that means you should aspire not to be a flake!)

I don't think my body type is average anymore... Nor do I feel I look overweight. So I shall take the path and state curvy/full figured. Why can't I be both, OkC?!
What I’m doing with my life
I'm a six year Air Force veteran, who got out in 2012, got his associates degree, graduated from CSU Sacramento with a degree in criminal justice and am currently working as a contractor for a federal agency as a criminal data analyst. I also began pursuing my masters and hopefully will not drive myself insane with work!

I also apparently excel at making sandwiches for lunch and then forgetting them at home.
I’m really good at
I can write, cook, entertain, love karaoke and I'm actually good at it!

I'm also good at being sarcastic, enjoy debating (Especially when I have no personal stake in it.), giving people nick-names, public speaking, and other generic things.

I also did Stand Up Comedy a few times in Korea at a few westerner bars. I'd like to get into it again but I'm also sort of worried I may too offensive for some people (Think Louis CK, folks).

I tend to pick up hobbies and sometimes lose interest in them. Which more or less means I'm a jack of many trades in skills that wouldn't ever really have any real use unless there is some sort of apocalypse!
The first things people usually notice about me
My sense of humour and apparent lack of tact. I dress nicely too. Didn't say I look nice. Just dress.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books:A Song of Ice and Fire, Catcher in the Rye, Ender's Game, World War Z, various other books revolving around post-apocolyptic things.

Shows/Movies: Sopranos, Breaking Bad, Sons of Anarchy, Schindler's List, Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, The Walking Dead, Scott Pilgrim Vs The World, Youth in Revolt, How I met your mother, It's always sunny in Philly, Schindler's List, Life is Beautiful, Beautiful Mind, Across the Universe (Really, I like anything that is good. Like Dramas, Comedies)

Music: The Killers, Eagles, Beatles, Kanye West, Green Day, Led Zeppelin, Arctic Monkeys, Black Keys... those all come to mind. I like pretty much everything but most Country.

Food: Love Sushi and Italian, can even cook the latter. Not a big fan of Korean sadly... unless it's BBQ.
The six things I could never do without
Good people, food, my liver, music, fun and sleep.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
The things I want to do with my life, should probably spend less time thinking and more time doing, no?

Zombie outbreaks are cool too. Hypothetical questions to pass time at work that often involve multiple choices and impossible situations. (If you were like a dragon and could breath anything instead of fire, what would it be? Duh. Bouncy Balls.)
On a typical Friday night I am
Kind of got the bar scene out of my system. Would love to find a fun girl who likes to stay in and/or go out to quieter bars (with karaoke!)
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
Actually... Not too private or embarassing, but funny; I fell into a duck pond once when I was 3 or 4 and my parents were too busy laughing at me screaming and splashing around as I was (likely) mauled by angry geese and swans that a stranger pulled me out.

Seriously. Don't fuck with geese.

In the end, don't do things that embarass you or shame you and you won't have to hide anything.

Oh, and since Korea I've developed a horrible fear of falling down stairs. Yet I haven't fallen down them yet. Only up...
You should message me if
If you'd like to start a contest to see who can write up the most awkward messages and send them out to the opposite sex on this site.

Or you know... You just want to talk or if you wanna get to know me!
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