29Brooklyn, United States
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
My self-summary
(what pronouns? surprise me! I'm not just genderfluid, I'm genderplasma.)

I have a full mailbox intentionally. If you "like" me and I "like" you back, it will let us send messages despite full mailboxes. Cool, right?

I am a mess of contradictory things. But that's okay, maybe! I could probably name a lot of them, but that would also mean a lot of sentences starting with "I am. . ." and that's boring. In the alternative, it might mean an overused Whitman quote (do I contradict myself?). . . So, let's do a thing without those things, I guess!

Before going to law school, I spent a lot of time just generally being a "Cool Guy (tm)" (not to be confused with a "Nice Guy (tm)!"). What does this mean? Well, if you asked a middle schooler what was a cool thing to be or do, eventually you would get most of the things I was doing. So, obviously, I was a glam-rock singer in New York City for a while, in addition to doing lots of other semi-professional music things. Obviously. I also taught yoga for a bit, in addition to doing some freelance writing, a very small amount of runway modeling, riding a bicycle across the country, and also taught the LSAT for a bit (okay, not so cool). There are definitely other things I did, but somehow, they escape me at the moment. Now I'm apparently a lawyer. I can no longer say "I ANAL," which is a thing, I guess.

As to what I'm looking for, I'm honestly rather unsure. I have many moments where I find myself wanting a primary/life partner or two.

Relatedly: I tend to be polyamorous, but I also have a weird thing where I don't think that there is such a thing as a "normal" monogamous relationship; every relationship involves a degree of negotiation about boundaries, and I tend to set my default a little further out than most. Of course, this recognition means that—like many other things—this limit is negotiable for me.

I don't know how much belongs on here, especially given that people might find it. But perhaps I should also mention that I tend a little kinky. Maybe a lot kinky. If you need a label, "switch" does pretty well (switch as to all the things; I've actually been playing with being a masochist Domme recently). If this doesn't scare you off, we can talk in more detail elsewhere. And by elsewhere, I really just mean a place where it's not me typing into the void.

Also: sometimes radical, always feminist.
What I’m doing with my life
Lawyer doing lawyer things at lawyer times and lawyer places. The weirdest part is I kind of love it. Ugh.

Wearing glasses and slowly growing my hair back out (but maybe cutting it again too?).
I’m really good at
Awkward but direct communication.
Being upside-down.
The first things people usually notice about me
I look a surprising amount like Patti Smith.

Or y'know, fill in the blank with some other famous person with a similar hair cut (Jim Morrison, Mick Jagger, Neil Gaiman, etc. all come up pretty often).
Six things I could never do without
Formal Logic
Informal Logic
Casual Logic
Business Casual Logic
Black Tie Logic
White Noise Logic
I spend a lot of time thinking about
How unbearably important everything is, yet how colossally insignificant anything we might call important must be.

If Colin Meloy recorded a version of "I Kissed A Girl" it would actually sound like one of his songs.

Can we hurry up and collectively get over beards? (But is this a problematic thing to think? I don't know. Probably not.)

Also, bees.
On a typical Friday night I am
Walking in to the shrink, singing a bar of "Alice's Restaurant," and walking out.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I have a huge back tattoo. It was my first one!

Either that or that I GMed a series of one-shot Tabletop RPGs using a home-brewed system based on a major anime/manga. I wrote a 30-page player's handbook. If you're willing to wrangle the cats to the table, I may even run it again.
You should message me if
<3 <3 <3 <3 <3:
-You need someone new in your tabletop roleplaying circle (who is willing to GM sometimes!).
-You are super organized and want to like... run my life.
-You need a super bendy rope bottom.
-You are a house boy/girl in need of a Domme and a house to clean.
-You are some sort of wonderful and mean Domme/sadist person.
-You want a Domme and like writing assignments.
-You want to do some kind of bodywork on me and fix my angry shoulder. I can do body work in return too.
-You want a knife play partner. On either side of the handle.
-You live in Bushwick, you want to become friends, and after we become friends, you're willing to cat sit.

I have made the thing above this line a list of people I need in my life right now, in varying degrees. Read below this line for what used to be here if you care. These all still apply and are an okay way to see what sorts of things I enjoy talking about.

Here are some ideas of reasons to message me:
You want to argue about answers to match questions—they seem like pretty good conversation starters, maybe.
You use em and en dashes—or really any form of less common punctuation—correctly.
You recognize that the sentence above is kind of funny coming from someone who adores Joyce.
You have weird hair.
You have well thought out opinions on how to formally address a dominant partner. Or you want to share an unusual title you've used.
You have strong opinions on, well, anything. But extra much on philosophy or literature or law things.
You are aware of how awesome bees are.

Also: you found a typo or error in my profile. That shit's embarrassing and I would like to fix it.
The two of us